Eternal Code

What's the old cliche? A new spin on an old thing? Hey folks, I'm back with a request review from our old friend, producer Joe Williamson of Williamson Management Company (Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance, Check Point, Holy Terror, Nation's Fire, Moon of the Blood Beast, Meathook Massacre: The Final Chapter) and he had a humble request to give the once over for a new Harley Wallen film. Director Harley Wallen (Deceitful, Moving Parts, Bennett's Song, Abeyance and Betrayed) has a new action thriller so let's give it an eyeful. This is Eternal Code.

Honey, I think this Craigslist orgy is wrong now.

We open with a young man on the ragged edge, hastily scribbling notes and pulls a USP .45 to clear his mind when a young prostitute, Stephanie (Kaiti Wallen of Moving Parts, Bennett's Song, Iced Out and Betrayed) is getting slapped around by her would-be John (Brian Heintz of Moving Parts, Lizard of Dogs, Betrayed, Revenge of the Mask, Ring of Silence and Be Somebody). Naturally the need to help another puts our suicidal lad Corey (Damien Chinappi of The Web of Spider-Man, Knightmare, Retribution, The Girl in the Attic, Betrayed and I Thought You Were a Nice Man) off his coconut scrambling ideas and proceeds to lay smack down on the puke and they disappear into the night.

Basing this story on Juan Ponce de Leon's(Conquistador, explorer, soldier and first governor of Puerto Rico) discovery of the fountain of eternal youth, a genetic research company has developed a miracle cure. One that will enrich human life for, shockingly enough for the rich and powerful. The idea of infinitely prolonging human life and slowing the aging process.

Hobo Hero...

However, the methods to bring this miraculous creation to be was immoral and completely unethical. The company's CEO Bridget Pellegrini (Erika Hoveland of Sparkle, Mary's Buttons, Ticket to the Circus, The House That Jack Broke, Believe Again, Proxy and Good News) wants to pull the plug and not watch her empire to go crumbling down. Her board of directors is trying to coax her to the dark side with promises of money and chocolate chip cookies and hey if you can't trust Oliver (Richard Tyson of 3 o'Clock High, Kindergarten Cop, There's Something About Mary, Battlefield Earth and Black Hawk Down) well, who can you trust?

Who took my smiley face mug? You Gary? Hmm?

 

The looks on the interns and lower echelon workers, seems to me a typical board meeting. Screaming and scheming is the order of the day, if not the week. Dr. Magnus (Yan Birch of Slumber Party Massacre III, The People Under the Stairs, Cyber Bandits, Ghost Rock, Terror Tales, Death House and Betrayed) also attempts to get Bridget to see the benefits that outweigh the repercussions. C'mon Bridget, the Stairmaster is right!  At least Mr. Pomeroy (Mel Novak of Game of Death, An Eye for an Eye, Sword of Heaven, Moonbase, Vampire Assassin, Thunderkick, Kill Factor, Syndicate Smasher, Holy Terror and Nemesis 5: The New Model) has her back. GO STICK!   I swear I will try to stop doing that.

Ongoing concern about this merger veto even hits home with Bridget's husband Mark (Billy Wirth of The Lost Boys, Body Snatchers, Reunion, The Talent Given Us, Duress, Chicago P.D., Last Curtain Call and Betrayed). He expresses he just doesn't want her getting hurt and is there to support her while he is making dinner. Damn right she put a ring on it!

Diabolical deeds done via Vida!

Corey and Stephanie slowly gain a rapport as two people broken by life are trying to mend. Two people guarding who they are opening up in a fashion they didn't think even possible again.

Oliver is done playing nice and contracts a crew to capture and contain Bridget and family. This nefarious piece of work, Sam (Harley Wallen of Moving Parts, Love Espionage: Spy Revenge, Halt: The Motion Picture, Betrayed, Be Somebody and Eternal Code) tells Oliver 5 million upfront so they can have a location for the kidnapping and another five once completed.

Considering kidnapping is a federal offense, yeah his team is gonna need the scratch to avoid prosecution. Costa Rica would be ideal.

With Bridget out of the way, Magnus can start the trials with the aid of Nikita (the vivacious Vida Ghaffari of Circus of Dread, The Catch, Holy Terror, Horndog's Beach Party, Robowoman, Moon of the Blood Beast and Meathook Massacre: The Final Chapter) and her talents.

With Corey and Stephanie trying to find out what happened to Bridget and Mark, time is ticking down. Can a burned out Vet and a street walker save the day? Will the company collapse?

This is just some damn good story telling. We got heart and soul of good people, that grim and gritty darkness of the villains and business being dealt regardless of the damage that it could produce. A solid thriller, good dialogue and an impressive cast, I have to say this Indie thriller is damn captivating. A nice slow build-up to give you all you need to know about the players and then, something new happens. Take notes, A-list films. This is how good yarn spinning is done. Does it need a sequel? Maybe not but I would like to see this cast brought back for a similar project. Took me ages to realize Charlie was Scout Taylor-Compton (Charmed, Halloween, Halloween II, NCIS Los Angeles, Wet and Reckless and Nashville). Brain was expecting her to be blonde. Smooth move, brain.

Just a side note here. Damien and Kaiti had real chemistry. I really hope to see them in more work. Maybe give them villain roles this time around. Sinister and brutal. Again all just ideas to toss out there. A tale of morality versus injustice. Strong character development for a 105 minute film. Excellent playing off each others emotions and I especially enjoyed Richard Tyson having next to no morals. Vicious character.

September 6 is a release of VOD on iTunes, Amazon, GooglePlay, Vudu and FandangoNow and the DVD release is scheduled later in the fall. Keep those eyes peeled, people!

Ho boy, Joker crew.

Finding Purpose

And we are back. Hello ladies and gentlemen. I was going to follow up Ninja Death with its sequel when the lovely and talented Dawna Lee Heising (Blade Runner, Kung Fu: The Movie, Big Trouble in Little China, Forbidden Warrior, Waiting for Dracula, Legend of the Red Reaper, Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance, Meathook Massacre II and Nemesis 5: The New Model) made request of me directly to take a look at today's cinematic, and who am I to refuse a lady her humble request? A compelling story of brotherly love, a fight of what is the law and what is morally right. Being helmed by writer/director John Reign (Bullets for Jesus, Snuff: Diary of a Serial Killer, Exorcism of the 7^th Demon, Blood Woods and Brokedown) it looks like it should be a bit heart wrenching. This is Finding Purpose.

Um, pack of cigarettes?

With an all too familiar tale of a soldier that has fought for his country with distinction, Sergeant John Kayhill (John Reign of Bullets for Jesus, Destitute, Snuff: Diary of a Serial Killer, Brokedown, Finding Purpose and On the Arm) fought in the Bosian War and saved his men out of a serious slug throw fest that was that ambush.

25 years later, he is reduced to living in a trailer with no job prospects, the power and water being shut off and caring for his mentally handicapped brother, Rodney (cinematographer/actor Thomas Stoops of Wormwood's End, Blood Woods, Brokedown and Finding Purpose). Naturally Social Services had a field day with this, gathered the cops and took Rodney away from John due to unfit environment. Rodney is scared and the change in his life will have devastating effects for years to come. Furthermore, John is deemed less than savory to be around his brother at all and loses rights to visit him. Yeah folks, rock bottom is sinking in.

This a bug hunt, man. Game Over!

Not leaving a brother in the lurch, John's old army buddies decide they would help John and concoct a jail break for Rodney. Cue The Great Escape theme! Loaded with some getaway cash and a ride, the brothers are on their way to wherever the road takes theme.

A quick stop off at a strip club (no folk, no zombies.) and John reconnects with the lovely Skye (Dawna Lee Heising) and they see each other with seasoned but kind eyes. A shcmuck with a fat wallet, attitude and frankly in need of a serious ass whipping grabs young dancer Anna (April Love of Creed II, Finding Purpose and Volition). John's having none of this and well you know the fight is on. With the law not taking kind for this sort of action, April joins John and Rodney on the road.

The comaraderie is there and sometimes misery is beaten back by having company. A journey of the soul and simple dreams to be met. A mixture of the family you come from to the family you make.

Keep in mind, we have all the elements of a thriller/action drama with a thirty something ex-Special Forces badass and all the pithy one liners to be had. Instead with we have a down on his luck guy in his fifties that has integrity and duty. Honestly I appreciate this fresher look to it rather than a drag out action exploitation film without any real meaning and a huge body count.

So many taboo subjects that cause polite society to turn a deaf ear to. Mentally handicapped, to impoverished to near homeless veterans to the mere cruelty that is life. Imagine all these woes that John could have walked away from but his heart, his soul and his very honor would not allow such.

This film is not demanding special treatment or being preachy about bad things happen to good people. What this story is telling the audience that life will throw some wicked curve balls and you have the choice to wallow in your own pity or rise up and meet the challenge. It is that courage to tell this story that really makes the film. Some damn good hand held work, excellent blocking and a very professional vibe on the indie budget.

Call me Boris one more time...I dare you.

 As many of you know, I have...endured some indie films that have looked like a failed high school student with a handy cam and a bottle of Thunderbird got it in his/her head to put a film out there. Not so here. Our director allows a peek into his very life as his late brother was mentally challenged and that love and pain translates from the page to the screen. An authentic glimpse to the highs and lows of the family that must be strong. This was a tight cast and crew. A great cast, memorable moments and great performance. So impressive this film; that a sequel has been green lit and I think they will knock it out of the ball park.

Okay so who order the Moons over My Hammy?

Ninja Death

Okay, back from the hiatus. I have been working on freelance writing as well as, a radio script known as Fiends and Flatfoots. Basically Noir meets Horror. That however is not what we are enduring today. So combing through the more obscure 80s films, I noticed the 50 to 100 disc collections of martial arts, three titles and their alternative titles keep coming up so I thought I would take a gander at this. This is Ninja Death a.k.a. Ninja Kid.

Pajama Party!

No time for credits, introduction or story build-up! Yeah I am serious. This opens up with Samurai spilling Ninja blood. A gathering of warriors, their grand master watching over a princess with a baby and attempt to escape their capture and deaths. Guess we just dive into the action. This ridiculous fast pace is the first five minutes. With that in mind, the princess hurls herself off the cliff (clearly a dummy) and one of the brothers makes off with the baby.

Then for some reason we still skip title cards and have years later tag and fade.

Finding our protagonist Tiger (Alexander Rei Lo of Kung Fu Commandos, Shaolin vs Ninja, Shaolin vs Lama, Mafia vs Ninja, Shadow Killers Tiger Force and Ninja: The Final Duel) in a brothel and a cadre of pointless sex scenes (Yeah boys, there's titty!). The dialogue among the prostitutes sounds like it was written for a porno. Stay classy, movie.

Chinese Gandalf is most vexed.

Gobsmack amount of nudity, this bit of pointlessness is all leading up to intro of a brother and sister that work for Tiger. Tiger makes the brother engage in tons of montage training footage. Seriously, this all look like B footage set aside for filler. Also the grand master has to make a fabulous entrance worthy of Rip Taylor. He send the brother out to converse with a blind soothsayer because...why the hell not. The dubbing goes from American English to the Queen's English throughout this whole scene.

For some reason we have a gaggle of ninja trying to still find Tiger and the siblings. The Grand master has a bunch of ninja along with one wearing a devil mask, who goes completely mental every time the Grand master plays the flute. Who knew that could be a trigger?

With more fighting we see the devil masked ninja is actually Tiger's brother. Okay we have tons to get through.

Ninja Casual

 Firstly, the movie just abruptly starts as well as ends. I mean there weren't any title cards on either the beginning or the end of the film. I am baffled to what the hell I was watching.

After a bit of research, I found out this film and its sequels is actually all one movie that was diced up to make for sequels. This was a friggin' acid trip. Nothing of coherent for story, acting or even a decent explanation. This is either a brilliant bypass to story telling or a garbled hot mess.

Enough interest for me to see if the sequels would actually make ANY sense of this. What the hell, I'll give the second film a whirl.

Hmm decent Slipknot mask.

Night of the Creeps

Heya kids I am back and we are going for some 80s throwback. Why 80s? Well they are some of the most outlandish, bizarre and risk taking with stories. We are back with Tom Atkins (Escape from New York, The Howling, The Fog, The Rockford Files Halloween 3: Season of the Witch and Maniac Cop) and his awesome power imbuing mustache which has served him well via the 1980s and our film is being handled by writer/director Fred Dekker (House, The Monster Squad, If Looks Could Kill, Ricochet, Tales from the Crypt and Robocop 3) so expected weirdness. This is Night of the Creeps.

Yeah I didn't get lead, got stuck as love interest.

With an alternative title of Homecoming Night; our film already has cult classic status, as if college wasn't a difficulty enough but they now must contend with the Homecoming Dance. In the far away time of 1959, a spacecraft race to find an experiment from getting released by a member of the crew. This container holding said experiment crash lands on Earth.

A couple are parking and necking when they follow the path of a shooting star. An criminally insane patient has recently escaped and meets the creature, the aliens were in hot pursuit. A slug like creature makes the nutter butter even more crazy as he engages in a little axe murder. Said creature glurks out of ax murderer's mouth and the now ex-boyfriend captures it in a container.

Yes I am the hard ass. give it a squeeze.

30 years later... Sorry love the ellipses.  At any rate, 30 years later we have a gaggle of teens headed to college, jammed pack with hormones and need for identity.  Two frat pledges, Chris (Jason Lively of Brainstorm, National Lampoon's European Vacation, Monday Morning, Rock 'n' Roll High School Forever and Maximum Force) and JC (Steve Marshall of Night Heat, 21 Jump Street, Justice Denied and Sleeping in a Dream) end up releasing our film's evil McGuffin and the guy frozen in '59 and out and about infecting brohans and making slug wagons (pithy euphemism for zombies controlled by semi-intelligent, intergalactic slugs).

Damn Zombrohan! Use a door!

Chris while freaked out by the walking dead guy, he makes his way to the dance. Meanwhile the cops get a report from the cryogenics department in this small town college and head of investigations is none other that Detective Cameron (Tom Atkins of The Fog, The Howling, Halloween III: Season of the Witch and Maniac Cop), a hard-assed, bad ass on the ragged edge. Probably two weeks from retirement. He recognizes the frozen body as it was the kid from '59 that disappeared all those years ago. Cameron has to get to the bottom of all this.

And before it is asked, yes there is mild nudity so thank the gods we cleared up the age old question I get. "Will there be titty?" With Chris, Cynthia and Cameron working together, the slug wagons attack the prom pre-party for some monster mayhem. Still love that Cameron happened to have a flame thrower in police armory. In a small town. Totally believable.

The cluster of ideas and themes blends pretty well together with a mixture of 1950s Sci-fi alien invasions the zombie craze courtesy of George Romero, a dash of slasher film and even some teenage touchy feely dialogue worthy of John Hughes.

With seven days this script was penned by the director, selling the product with the notation, unless he directed it, he wasn't selling the script. The granite hew balls on this guy! Tristar floats him $5 million for his 1986 release. Not too shabby. While the gross was only about five hundred thousand in gross box office, this film did better with the video rental crowd and became a cult classic.

A quick side note. All main characters' last names are the names of famous Horror directors, Bruce Solomon's Sgt Raimi (Sam Raimi of The Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn), Jill Whitlow's Cynthia Cronenberg (David Croneneberg of Scanners, Videodrome, The Dead Zone and The Fly) Wally Taylor's Detective Landis (John Landis of The Blues Brothers, An American Werewolf in London and Innocent Blood) Jason Lively's Chris Romero (George A. Romero of Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Martin, Day of the Dead, Creepshow and Monkey Shines). There really is no one category for this film as it is comedy, horror, sci-fi and action.

This is another one of those flicks you can't simply quantify and group. Last film tidbit, Fred Dekker was roommates with Shane Black and they both worked on the script. Later Shane Black would go on to writing Lethal Weapon and Predator.   Scream Factory released a collector's edition Blu-ray a month ago. Considering it was in bootleg territory in 2005, it is nice to see it getting some love in the current format.

Evil slugs or sentient turds?

Young Justice

Howdy. I wanted to write about a cartoon that has been constantly enjoyable and yes I am a forty something watching this. What of it? Not since Justice League has a cartoon been well thought out, written, voice cast and brilliant art. With primary characters hailing from Teen Titans, without the cutesy story-lines and pizza parties, a more serious approach is done still giving a blend of humor and drama. This is Young Justice.

I wonder why I get so many movies.  Oh right, I'm Batman.

With this young team of partners/sidekicks calling the shots on what to do and how to dispense justice, the Justice League feels their young partners are now ready to begin the next level and become closer to the League. Unfortunately, the Leaguers still hold secrets over them and this irks Speedy a.k.a. Red Arrow (Crispin Freeman of Naturo:Shippuden, For Honor, Teen Titans: The Judas Contract, Doomfist Origin Story, Justice League Action) and he splits on Green Arrow.

The rest of the team consisting of Robin/Dick Grayson(Jesse McCartney of Pizza, Jesse McCartney: Get Your Shine On, Kingdom Hearts II, Alvin and the Chipmunks, Horton Hears a Who!, Tinker Bell and The Hardy Boys: The Hidden Theft), Kid Flash/Wally West(Jason Spisak of Everything Must Go, Piranha 3D, Time Lapse,Young Justice and LEGO DC: Batman: Family Matters) and Caldur/Aqualad (Khary Payton of Dracula II: The Ascension, Batman: Arkham Underworld, Mafia III, Young Justice, The Lion Guard, DC Super Hero Girls: Legends of Atlantis and The Walking Dead) go and investigate a weird happening near their school. The project black ops funded cloning process called CADUMUS is less than legal, moral or ethical.

There's something squishy in my boot!

One of their projects is to create a Superman they can completely control for government black ops. Yeah a demigod with a kill switch. Comforting and clearly what tax dollars should be allocated for. Upon finding this Superboy (Nolan North of Uncharted, Uncharted 2, Deadpool, Hulk Vs, Spider-Man, Lego DC Super-Villains, The Lion Guard, Voltron: Legendary Defender and Marvel's Avengers), the team hold their own against villains and stand up for what is right with their mentors. Joining their motley crew is Meg'ann Marz or Miss Martian (Danica McKellar of The Wonder Years, Good Neighbor, The Year That Trembled, Justice League, Sex and the Teenage Mind, Static Shock, X-Men Legends, Inspector Mom and Young Justice) to round out the team.

As their adventures need a bit more stealth and motivation, Batman (Bruce Greenwood of Knots Landing, Passenger 57, Treacherous Beauties, Nowhere Man, Class of the Titans, Star Trek, Batman: Under the Red Hood, Star Trek Into the Darkness and Young Justice) trains the kids in martial arts, espionage, counter-terrorism and subterfuge. So this is a Titans team under Batman tutelage. Their levels just went up. Later new members join the ranks and get to learn how dangerous the really real world is and good and evil isn't so cut and dry. It's a high stakes game of patience, combat and execution of plans.

Not even warmed up, Robin.

Understand, there is more than a few Justice League based story-lines but the primary characters are this Young Justice team. Following them as they grow into their roles and still behave as teens and friends.

For the avid DC Fans, we get plenty of villain appearances, characters we thought the WB and DC forgot about, stakes, actions and consequences. Voice cast alone is worth this.

This is DC Comics at its best. Taking a hiatus due to ratings around Season 2, the gang has come back for Season 3 and is still going strong. Honestly I have not enjoyed DC like this since Justice League. Completely worthy of the hardened DC fans, casual viewers and all ages. You will get a lot from this 25 minute cartoon. Oh and kids, you may have to field questions like the following: "Which one is that one?" "Do all these kids have powers?" "How come they listen to that guy?" and so on.

So why are you down capes and tights?

Captain Marvel

Howdy all. Well time for a new release. Yes I know so many of you wanted an obscure Italy Horror or an Exploitation film from the 1950s but dammit I need some new viewing material from time to time. With this new Marvel "Cough Disney subservient" release, the controversy (that really isn't) we finally have a female protagonist not surrounded by male counterparts in the sense they have to protect or govern her.   As Phase 3 is commencing and it's all about outer space, it is time.  This is Captain Marvel.

C'mon, put 'em up! Put 'em up!

Our story is in a far away time...the dreaded 1990s.  That savage time period.   Cellphones could barely flip, we had actual face-to-face conversations and our music wasn't completely sucky.   Enter a young Kree (Alien species with blue blood that can resurrect humans) recruit Vers (Bria Larson of Free Fire, Room, Kong: Skull Island, The Glass Castle, Unicorn Store, Basmati Blues and Captain Marvel) is having confusing dreams/nightmares. A link to the past? Another life before the Kree? Who can say?

She and her trainer/mentor Yon-Rogg (Jude Law of Gattaca, Final Cut, A.I. Artificial Intelligence, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, Alfie and Repo Men) tells her in true Obi-Wan fashion to be mindful of her feelings, powers and surroundings. To serve the Empire with diligence, dignity and grace.  She's a bit headstrong, cocky and some levels, arrogance. I like that. Reminds me of me. No wait, that's another film. She and her team are on mission to stop Skrulls (race of shapeshifting and transmographing alien combantants) for disrupting the harmony of an outside system under Kree protection.  Vers is captured and probed (mind not anus. You perverts) as the gaps in her memory show her a parallel life on an insignificant blue and green planet involving primitive vehicles like go-karts, 64 and a half Mustangs, Hornet fighter jets and hey... ain't that Earth? How kooky.

The domesticated Skrull attends to light housekeeping and dusting.

As Vers is done with hanging upside down, she proceeds to open a big gulp worth of whoop ass on the Skrulls, escapes the vessel in a pod and crash land in a refuge of movie known as Blockbuster Video.  Hope I didn't lose the Milennials again. Prior to Red Box, there was a store that provided you VHS and DVDs, snacks and soda, along with human interaction on selecting films of current or previous eras. Thanks to progress...we have none of those. Hurrah.

With being an extraterrestrial, she is flanked by a couple of SHIELD agents, Fury (Samuel L Jackson of Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown, Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace, Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Captain America: The First Avenger, The Avengers, Black Snake Moan, The Incredibles and Afro Samurai) without his mother f bombs (so sad) and Phil Coulson (Clark Gregg of Spartan, The West Wing, When a Stranger Calls, The Air I Breathe, Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Thor, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., The Avengers, Ultimate Spider-Man and Captain Marvel). Assigned by their higher ups to keep tabs on Vers, understand and plan for the Skrulls and see if she is on our side.

Jackson senses MF Bombs but is forbidden to utter them.

With Vers' team lead by Yon-Rogg, I can't help but recognize a few later villainous fellows such as Korath (Djmon Housou of Stargate, ER, The Four Feathers, Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life, Constantine, The Island, Blood Diamond and Guardians of the Galaxy) and Ronan the Accuser (Lee Pace of Pushing Daisies, A Single Man, When in Rome, The Resident, 30 Beats, Lincoln, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug and Guardians of the Galaxy) so yeah a tad flashback like. Not unlike this whole film granted.

Piecing together her life on Earth and in the Kree homeworld, Hala Vers is having conflicting memories about a FTL drive (Faster than Light) and who it would benefit.

Can Vers agree to work with SHIELD? Can the Skrulls be defeated? Can the Kree be trusted?

So yeah Marvel, nice of you to get off your ass and finally have a predominant female protagonist film. Not as though Marvel archives are rife with them and...oh wait, THERE ARE TONS of them!! Let's address the chauvinistic pricks that whined about this movie. Fellas, what's the damn problem? She came, she saw and she kicked ass.   Had Spidey levels of quips, energy channeling and re-directional blasts, flight, strength. She's Captain Marvel. So what's the friggin' problem? Did you not "See Yourselves?" Boo frickin' hoo. How many muscle bound male hero flicks out there? You can find more than a few.

This is Black Panther whiny white guy bitching all over again. Frankly, I wanted to see Valkyrie, She-Hulk, Spider-Woman, Elsa Bloodstone and Misty Knight 20 YEARS AGO, but I cannot bitch and complain about that all the time. I would be tedious and annoying. Much like the pricks that complained about this film. Solid storyline, a few alterations to meet the current timeline, great cameos and nods to the current nifty gags and tropes, this is a decent flick.

Oh and guys that ask me this FAR TOO OFTEN, no there is no titty in the movie. 

Miles away, Hollywood Video had Hercules drunk again.

Messiah of Evil

How goes it? Well after that festering stink nugget of a film Monday, I need a pick me up. Alas no ether in site so I will have to just watch today's movie and hope for the best. Another horror film but at least the synopsis offers promise. A young woman searches for her missing artist father in a California sea based town, but the whole area is watched by a strange cult of the undead. This is Messiah of Evil.

Worse orgy...ever.

Worry not, gentle readers. This is yet another alternative titled film. Titles like: Messiah of the Evil Dead, Deep Swamp, Messiah of Evil: The Second Coming, The Second Coming, Revenge of the Screaming Dead, Return of the Living Dead, Dead People, Night of the Damned and Blood Busters. What a collective of festive titles.

We see a young man with that seventies hair, the Epstein from Welcome Back Kotter and he's wearing corduroy. Apparently running for quite a while or he is a chain smoker and it's only been 5 blocks. A young girl lets him into her pool patio where he takes it easy for a moment and then throat slashed open with a straight razor with the first minute and 22 seconds. Boom title card! No screwing around here.

We have some mildly depressing music. Think Morrisey. As a young woman down a long hallway declares that madness is all around her and they can't even hear her scream. The monologue feels as though the main protagonist is recapping those events prior and we are playing catch up.

Gentle and demure Arletty (Marianna Hill of Mannix, The Name of the Game, The Baby, High Plains Drifter, Kung Fu, The Magician, The Godfather: Part II and S.W.A.T.) is on a quest to find her wayward artist father in the small beach town of Point Dume, California. She arrives at his beachfront house to find it abandoned. Bereft of life in the house, she finds a diary specifically addressed to her. As she reads through it, her father complains about a darkness consuming the town little by little, these ominous nightmares he has been having and tell her to never look for him. I was personally waiting for a to do list, grocery list and possibly girls he slept with and his ratings on each of them.

So pants optional at this gas station? Okaaay.

She rolls into town, low on gas and a full service station! What a myth. Her attendant seems to busting caps into howling creatures' collective asses. No wolves were hurt in the making of this film. The poor foley guy though. Ouch. Dude comes right over, cleans the windows and gases her up and there is this huge awkward pause. Because honestly do you want to ask what he was shooting at, not knowing if he is unhinged?

The owner of the art gallery was absolutely no help whatsoever as he recounts vaguely meeting Arletty's father and said that none of his work would sell as all his paintings had gatherings of peopele in that were black, white and grey. The men were all in black suits, white shirts and black ties. So either the Mormons moved heavily in Cali, the Men in Black stationed there or this was some serious brown acid he dropped.

Arletty bumps into smooth aristocrat Thom (Michael Greer of The Gay Deceivers, Diamond Stud, The Curious Female, Fortune and Men's Eyes, The Streets of San Francisco, Summer School Teachers and Sunshine) and his two bits of posh crumpets Toni (Joy Bang of Maidstone, The Young Lawyers, Hawaii Five-O, Pretty Maids All in a Row, Night of the Cobra Woman, Room 222, and Cisco Pike) and Laura (Anitra Ford of The Big Bird Cage, Invasion of the Bee Girls, The Longest Yard, Messiah of Evil, Starsky & Hutch, Wonder Woman, Baretta and The Streets of San Francisco).

Group hickeys!!!

They are gadding about and having fun but Thom has to interview the town kook for an article on the town of Point Dume, Charlie (my favorite character actor, Elisha Cook Jr. Of The Maltese Falcon, A Gentleman at Heart, Dark Waters, The Big Sleep, Shane, House on Haunted Hill, Peter Gunn, Rosemary's Baby, Blacula, The Night Stalker and Salem's Lot). Charlie speaks about the 100^th anniversary of the dark stranger that came to town. He also talk about the blood moon. The night of the blood moon appears and the evil will consume the town. It's at this point, I have already packed my bags and got the hell out of there. Elisha also provides more bug eyes than he did even in House on Haunted Hill. Looks like a deranged leprechaun hoarding his Lucky Charms from those pesky kids.

Well about this time to start thinning out the cast, am I right? Sorry barely line having eye candy, yer toast.

Thom and girls get bounced out of the hotel like a bad check and they all crash at Arletty's dad's pad.

Yeah that was some seventies lingo but so is the flick.

Arletty takes her time through dad's journal and that is a trope pet peeve of mine. Read the whole thing through one sitting dammit. Think of the lives you could spare. And don't read any book of unspeakable evil out loud. Okay done ranting but the journal wasn't even that long.

Can the evil be thwarted? With Arletty, Thom and the girls survive the night?

Let's see... the pace was kind of on the move from the get go. They didn't dally but still had plenty of time to build up suspense. The kills are reasonably nasty and the plot was unusual and clever linking to a horror of the past. Honestly I think if you found a better copy than what I got, you would enjoy it. Old school story telling with a bit of freedom from the stereotypical standings of the genre. This sort of mob scene is pre Romero's The Crazies or Dawn of the Dead. No I am not giving away any more spoilers than necessary because it would ruin the film experience. Personally, I liked it. Good and creepy. The music scores were a tad odd. Just what I presume an acid trip would sound like in your head. Weird spoken word tunes and some ORGAN MUSIC!!

Aside from that, it was fun. For those that felt it wasn't their cup of tea, have fun riffing it at a drinking party.

Joni Mitchell looks HiIiIiIIiIIiigh!!!!