Countess Dracula

Apologies for being vacant to the blog. Freelancing writing and Rotten Riffs writing has made me busy. So after a series of different film requests, I decided I would pick my own review for a change. I felt like exploring towards a Hammer film. It's been awhile so clearly it is time to give it a view. Our story is an old tale of Countess Elizabeth Bathory and her unique bathing habits of virgin girls' blood. This is Countess Dracula.

Ms. Pitt if you're nasty.

Released back in 1971, this was a double bill with Vampire Circus during its marquee debut. Wasn't that a nifty film fact?

Brought to us by director Peter Sasdy (Journey to the Unknown, Journey Into Darkness,Taste the Blood of Dracula, Hands of the Ripper, Doomwatch, Nothing But the Night, Orson Welles' Great Mysteries, 1990, Return of the Saint and Sherlock Homes and Doctor Watson) and I last beheld his work in Taste the Blood of Dracula. Our aging countess Elizabeth (Ingrid Pitt of Where Eagles Dare,The Vampire Lovers, Countess Dracula, The Wicker Man, Octopussy, The Comedy of Errors, Doctor Who, Bones, Underworld and Hanna's War) discovered a way to revive youth, beauty and even sex drive by bathing in the blood of young women.

Gypsies, tramps and thieves...

Her faithful servant and lover Captain Dobi (Nigel Green of Zulu, The Ipcress File, Jason and the Argonauts, The Ruling Class, Clochemerle, The Protectors and Gawain and the Green Knight) in league with her maid Julie (Patience Collier of House of Cards, Baby Love, Every Home Should Have One, Perfect Friday, Countess Dracula, Fiddler on the Roof, Endless Night, Shoulder to Shoulder, David Copperfield,Who Pays the Ferryman? And Sapphire & Steel) as she commands them to fetch young, nubile girls for draining the precious bodily fluids (Yes I did make a Doctor Strangelove reference.) Also how convincing is your argument telling subordinates to capture young women for nefarious deeds, let alone where do you conceal the bodies?

So to conceal her nefarious deeds, the countess takes on the persona of her daughter Ilona (Lesley-Anne Down of The Smashing Bird I Used to Know, All the Right Noises, Assault, From Beyond the Grave, Brannigan, The First Great Train Robbery, Hanover Street, Arch of Triumph and Nomads) of which she sent the good Captain to watch over her and while the cat's away the mouse picks up a new lover in the form of Lt. Toth (Sandor Eles of Marked Personal, The Tunnel, Love and Death, Eleanor Marx, The Assignment, The Foundation, The Treachery Game, Crossroads and Sherlock Holmes and the Leading Lady).

This necklace will really accent my breasts.

After using the blood of a prostitute, the adverse effects cause the countess to age rapidly and the town historian, Fabio (Maurice Denham of Animal Farm, The Alphabet Murders, Nicholas and Alexandra, The Day of the Jackal, Behaving Badly, Lovejoy, Inspector Morse, Peak Practice, The Bill and Pie in the Sky) has noticed the steady decline of virgin girls. I guess he has a doctorate in that too. Maybe he has the stick from Lair of the White Worm, the virgin dowsing rod if you will. The saddest problem is the town while under superstition, and they really have no true desire to send out search parties for these missing girls. This has been going on for months and what? It was a series of wolf attacks? Some wily bear murdering young girls? I just wondered how they justify their cowardice.

Now some fun film facts. Oh suck it up and just read.

Elton John makes a cameo appearance as one of the villagers and yes I immediately recognized the ROCKET MAAAAAN... Ingrid Pitt replaced Diana Rigg for the lead role. Apparently Ingrid Pitt was voice dubbed and she was pissed at director Peter Sasdy for such and refused to speak to him again.

As this was a bit typical for Hammer at this timeline, that sexy girls on the screen kept men's butts in seats but you probably already gathered that. With this said, the costumes, the orchestral soundtrack and professional film crew does the film justice. No I am not anti-boobies, fellas. It does just get a tad bit tiresome after enough of these flicks. Yes the parable or allegory of aging gracefully, being jealous of the young and how women are often judged by aging are all here. In spite of her monstrous ways of slaughtering girls, you can't help but feel bad for her as well. It is a true split of horror and compassion.

Sorry I heard nothing. I was gawking at your breasts.

The Satanic Rites of Dracula

Hey gang. Sorry for the substantial delay. Between a hasty move, loading that away in a storage unit and some family emergency hospital stays, well I have been busy. So today, totally up my alley we go back to the Hammer Productions in the far away time of 1974 and yet IMDB swears it to be 1978.

We see how that lineage of Van Helsing is coping with its ancient evil nemesis, Dracula himself. As luck would have it, it is also (All together now!) has alternative titles. Sharpen those stakes, have holy water at the ready and prepare for the groovin' seventies. This is The Satanic Rites of Dracula.

Count Dooku?  RUUUUUUUUNNN!!!!

With a myriad of alternative titles such as: Count Dracula and His Vampire Bride, Dracula Is Alive and Well and Living in London, Dracula Is Dead...and Well and Living in London, Dracula and His Brides and Rites of Dracula. Yes, once again this still holds sway that all that is black arts, necromancy, demonic incantations automatically gets lumped into witchcraft. There's a difference, writers. It's called research. Try it.   Really makes you feel for the Wicca of the world.  Just worshiping elements and bestowing common decency.

Anywho, a gathering of black art practitioners have gotten around the man cave to resurrect Dracula (Sir Christopher Lee of The Blood of Dracula, The Hound of the Baskervilles, The Wicker Man, Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring and Star Wars: Attack of the Clones) have a standard white goat (Human sacrifice) at the ready to bring the awesome malefic vampire back. Something about a demon god assisting in this as well. They are kind of all over the map. A collective of prominent citizens strive to bring back the dark prince to usher in a new era.

Meanwhile in an adjacent room, some poor fellow is being held against his will by what looks like roadies for Bread. After a brief strangling and gimping his way out of the manor, he gets sped away in a car to Scotland Yard, where his report tells of these untouchable men and women in society could be engaging in blood rites and ancient practices that defy God.  Hmm sounds like Scientology to me. 

And that's when I dropped the occult and went into folk dancing.

Hehe, moving on. Inspector Murray (Michael Coles of Doctor Who and the Daleks, The Avengers, Department S, Dracula A.D. 1972, The Sweeney and Pie in the Sky) of Dracula '72 has worked with a an expert of the occult (sadly no it is not Damian Hellstrom, my Marvel fans) but none other than a Lorimar Van Helsing (Peter Cushing of The Curse of Frankenstein, Horror of Dracula, The Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires, The Ghoul, Land of the Minotaur, Shock Waves and The Uncanny) to aid in their endeavors and shed some much needed light on the subject.

Listening in his study Lormiar takes note of all the undercover agent has witnessed and fears for us all. Quick FYI, his granddaughter Jessica has timelady regenerated from Stephanie Beacham to Absolutely Fabulous's Joanna Lumley. Oh sure we could just say the actress was replaced but that's no fun at all.

With the combination of Scotland Yard and Helsing, they find out that one of the five men that was photographed is Professor Keeley (Freddie Jones of Dune, Krull, The Elephant Man, The Count of Monte Cristo and Emmerdale) who deals with virulent diseases pointing to a plague of biblical porportions. Inspector Murray and Jessica are looking over land deeds and noticing a building owned by a D.D. Denham, a wealthy individual that is a recluse, never seen in the light of day....hmmm...

Worse Craigslist orgy...ever.

Further investigations to the Pellham House where they discover what can only be described as a harem of vampire wenches. Yeah almost as someone is building a cadre of lethal lovelies.

Can this mean that Dracula has returned and if so, why does he do business with mortal men when he can pretty much take whatever he wants with a bit of mind control? I mean Lord of the Vampires is a fairly hefty title right? Something rotten in the as they find the headquarters Denham is a new building erected over the very church Dracula died two years prior. Helsing is convinced something is afoot and proceeds to take measures but can he do it in time before the Sabbat of the Undead takes place? Why does this feel a bit convoluted? What is the mystery of Sasquatch?

For the record, this isn't a bad follow-up to Dracula A.D. 1972 but it wasn't as clever. It had some cloak and dagger elements but it really just seemed like the aristocracy dealing with the lowly peasants and hoped that Dracula would not turn on them.  Perhaps they have been mesmerized to do Dracula's bidding.   A fun piece to be sure but you have to be a Hammer fan and not a causal viewer. Course by that same standing if you are just now diving into Hammer Dracula, why the hell would you start this far into the series?

You see the arse on Lumley? Damn.

Grindhouse Flicks: Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires

Hey there teen gang and welcome back for Day 4 of Grindhouse Flicks. Well we've had some blaxploitation, a biker/satanist themed movie and a slasher/thriller low budget cult film. What are we lacking??? OoOo how about a Kung Fu film? But this can't be just any Kung Fu flick. No, it cannot. We need something to punch it up a bit. I know! Vampires added to the mix! Oh and Dracula as a main baddie but... we won't elude to his existence right away. Yeah, that will do nicely. This is Legend of the 7 Golden Vampires.

Of course I am Christopher Lee...grr...rawr.

Hammer Films presents a trip to China vampire style!!! With director Roy Ward Baker (Don't Bother to Knock, A Night to Remember, Five Million Years to Earth and Asylum) and uncredited director for location Cheh Chang (Blood Brothers, One-Armed Swordsman, Crippled Avengers and Five Deadly Venoms) comes a Hammer Film of multiple alternative titles. My personal favorite is The 7 Brothers Meet Dracula. Sounds like they just dropped in for tea and biccies. Eleven English alternative titles for this puppy so this should be interesting.

Our film opens with a shaman of Chinese descent making his way to Castle Dracula in Translyvania with the burden of his quest. To take audience with Count Dracula (John Forbes-Robertson of The Vault of Horror, The Vampire Lovers, Nicholas and Alexandra, The Man from Nowhere, The Island of Adventure, Samson and Delilah and Room 36) and ask him to restore the power of the 7 Golden Vampires given the seventh one has been slain. With Dracula's power base the reigning vamps can be at full strength and rule over China once more from beyond the grave... or check in a psycho ward, whichever happens first. Dracula listens and makes his own demand of inhabiting the shaman/priest's body in order to leave the land and make it across China. Serious commitment there brohan!

Revenge of the three bean salad!

Meanwhile as luck or a clever plot device Professor Lawerence Van Helsing (Peter Cushing of The Horror of Dracula, The Mummy, Doctor Who and the Daleks, Island of Terror, Sherlock Holmes, Star Wars, Shock Waves and Top Secret!) is tending a lecture circuit to at a Chongqing University on the legends of Chinese vampires. The legends he speaks of is a village ruled and harassed by a cult following the immortal Golden Vampires. Apparently a peasant farmer lost his wife to the vampires and he trekked all the way on foot to their main temple. Finding several women strapped to tables to be fed on the farmer armed only with a pitch-fork (No boomstick for this badass) did battle with the vampires. Permanently losing his wife the farmer swiped a bat-like talisman off one of the vamps and high-tailed in outta there. Placing the talisman around a Jade Buddha he attempted to get the villagers to open the gates only to be fanged and drained. Still ballsy guy in my book. With the Buddha being consecrated or holy, the vampires cannot obtain the talisman.

Later Helsing is spoken to by a student Hsi Chang (David Chiang of Blood Brothers, Death Duel, Shaolin Handlock, Shaolin Mantis, Strife of Mastery and Once Upon a Time in China II) explains the legend is true and the man that defiled the vampire temple was his grandfather. While the vampires slumber the seventh moon of the year is almost upon this village. Chang asks for Helsing's assistance in dispatching this ancient evil. Helsing agrees and he and his son Leyland (Robin Stewart of Damn the Defiant!, Bless This House, Oliver Twist, Sweet and Sour, A Tale of Two Cities and Sons and Daughters) will join the battle.

Can they stop Dracula from making the Seven Golden Vampires whole? Will the village suffer? Can they be stopped?

A couple of notations for the movie at this time.

Christopher Lee was first approached to reprise Dracula again but he was less than interested with the script and passed so the torch was given to John Forbes-Robertson. This is the only Hammer film starring Dracula that the Count's name was not featured in the title. We got to hear a Wilhelm scream during the big fight in the village as Helsing chucked a zombie into a fire pit.

While this was supposed to follow directly after Scars of Dracula the continuity claims Dracula to have travel from Transylvania in 1804 and arrive in China in 1904. an entire century of which Dracula was in London, Germany and Transylvania so it does not match up with the rest of the Dracula Hammer films at all. Plus...no Christopher Lee. Got a little sick of the servitors' tune which sounded like a combination of bumble bees trapped in a tin can, trumpets and tambourines.

Still quite entertaining and very challenging for an English production to the wire work, fight choreography and stunts via China. These days that is a walk in the park by comparison.

Eternal life does not excuse poor hygiene!!!

Sir Christopher Lee Week: The Horror of Dracula

Welcome back for Day 2 of Sir Christopher Lee Week. As mentioned prior the man of the week had more than a few reoccurring appearances with his main character. Harken back to 1958 when Dracula was tall, majestic and all the while vicious and one would dare say brutal. So grab your crucifix, holy water and a few stakes. This is the Horror of Dracula.

Do I have something on my chin?

Veteran Hammer Film Director Terrence Fisher (The Curse of Frankenstein, Horror of Dracula, The Revenge of Frankenstein, The Hound of the Baskervilles, and The Man Could Cheat Death) brings in my humble opinion a timeless tale of the misdeeds of the Lord of the Vampires. We open with our movie on Jonathan Harker (John Van Eyssen of Chance Meeting, Four Sided Triangle and Quartermass 2) a mind mannered librarian arriving in Transylvania to catalog Count Dracula’s extensive library but in fact is to investigate Count Dracula (Christopher Lee of Horror of Dracula, The Three 
Musketeers, The Man with the Golden Gun, Dracula and Son and Star Wars: Episode II- Attack of the Clones) and the possible link he has with a cult of vampirism. Soon after encountering one of Dracula’s brides, Harker is determined to rid the world of this undead monster, manages to stake the girl but is thereby angered Dracula and is slain by him.

Almost certain that is not how to perform the Heimlich maneuver.

Doctor Van Helsing (Peter Cushing of The Curse of Frankenstein, The Abominable Snowman, The Hound of the Baskervilles, The Brides of Dracula, Dr. Who and the Daleks, Star Wars: Episode IV- A New Hope and Shock Waves) arrives in Transylvania in search of the whereabouts of his associate; only to find Harker had been made a vampire and he slew his former colleague. He finds a few detailed clues that Dracula has vacated the country in search for Harker’s fiancé, Lucy. Desperate to catch the fiend before he has the girl under his spell, Helsing rushes back to London in the hopes that he can end Dracula’s tyranny of terror.

How about some groovy facts on the film. 

Christopher Lee had 13 lines in this movie, then it was snarls and slapping people about.

  Peter Cushing gets top billing but appears 25 minutes into the movie.   An unusual move for the director but I am not  judging.    On several occasions Lee complained about his contact lenses that were there for effect to shock and awe the audience but they were the hardened lenses  and colored so he couldn't always see and he missed the vampire woman a few times trying to grasp her.

What can I say about this movie? Well it is one of the Technicolor greats. Filmed in standard 35mm stock and has two very distinguished British actors Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. The film has a good pace and does not leave much time to moll over scene to scene. The wide angle shots of the castle’s interior will astound you. The musical score in junction with the exterior castle shots and even those of the graveyard just sends mild chills down the spine. The fog on the graveyard followed by the orchestration just sets the tone of this movie. Lee’s portrayal of Dracula is one of elegance and object cruelty. Cushing is steadfast as a hero and you get the feeling would sacrifice his own life to end Dracula.

Sorry gore fans this is not that messy for you but I think the plot and performances should make up for that. As for the rest of you that may have grown up on these films as well as your children did. Pop it in your DVD player and give it the love it deserves.

HICKEY ATTACK!!!!

Blog#350!!!! Vampire Grab Bag Week: The Kiss of the Vampire

Wow we have arrived at 350 blogs already!  That is simply amazing.

Howdy all and apologies for not starting Day 3 of Vampire Grab Bag Week yesterday.  A different sleep schedule threw me off so clearly there is no reason why we don’t excavate another title out of the bag today.  How about another Hammer vampire film but without Christopher Lee?  Balderdash you might say and many would agree as this was intended to be the third Dracula but the story got mangled and garbled to no end in sight completely detracting the whole Dracula standing and was made a standalone vampire movie.  So grab your cross, holy water, garlic and perhaps a good axe or falchion.  This is The Kiss of the Vampire.

 

Pardon, the three bean salad backfired.

Servant: You keep away from here, or we’ll set the spoilers on you!

Thankfully with no association with the Karnstein trilogy our story takes place not in Austria but in the far mountain range of Bavaria, Germany.  Vampires dig chocolate don’t you know.    Our young honeymooning couple having just arrived in this warm inviting village runs in a spot of bad luck to have their car breakdown at the most inopportune time.  Gerald (Edward De Souza of The Phantom of the Opera, The Mill on the Floss, Doctor Who, Mogul and The Spy Who Loved Me) and Marianne Harcourt (Jennifer Daniel of The Reptile, The Vortex, People Like Us, The Collectors and Love Is All There Is) are quite annoyed as they are out of gas and have no means for AAA so Gerald legs it after leaving his bride with the luggage to the nearest village in the hopes for a tow or gasoline to carry.  Young Marianne feels as though she is being spied on and finally can bare it no more, flees the car and heads towards the village about a half hour behind her husband.  A craggily old man channels his best Crazy Ralph impression and warns her to stay far away from the cast and to leave the area ASAP, PDQ and give it wings.

Slow it down kids, you're British so no emotions needed.

As predicted the tiny village being so isolated has no gas station to speak of but a brawny fellow helps Gerald with the car and the pair stay in a small inn ran by a little elderly couple that seem overtly superstitious and not very friendly.  Travel Book guide says it is worse than Motel Hell or the accommodations of Eaten Alive.     One of the local girls died prior and a funeral is being held; not be for a shabbily dressed fellow named Professor Zimmer flips her coffin lid and stakes her.  A blood curdling shriek omits from the coffin followed but a geyser of blood erupts from the corpse.

Keeping true Dracula standing a coachman arrives from the local squire informing them of the castle’s hospitality for stranded travelers.  Yes that castle they have been warned off from.  So of course our nitwits head there for turning down such an invitation would be the height of bad manners.  The locals shake and scratch their heads at the sheer bravado/stupidity of the couple and pray for their very souls.

So what to take away from this film?  Well apparently vampire cult and Satanism are one and the same as it was with the Karnstein Trilogy, this entire town somehow thrives in spite of vampire raids every so often and oh yes let us warn newcomers but not give them the full skinny. The rubber bats were killing me, I could not stop laughing. The day for night shots were predictably painful to stare at.  Not a bad film but hardly a great one.  

Vampire Tango of Terror!!!

Vampire Grab Bag Week: Lust For A Vampire

Day 2 of the Vampire Grab Bag Week is upon us!   I bring us to the continuation of the Karnstein Trilogy.  A film that has many a buxom young lady, many an overtly drawn out scene, late night nude swims and creepy eyed men that almost hit the caliber of Christopher Lee but not quite and yes once again implied lesbian themes.   It seems Hammer was desperate to keep bottoms in the theater seats so clearly scantily clad females or topless ones will grasp the notice of many a horndog man.  So get your torches, blades and stakes for the vampiress is on the loose.  This is Lust for a Vampire.

School lunch program looks good to me!

You too will fall under the spoiler of Mircalla and then you will be damned for all eternity!

Once again an adaptation of Sheridan Le Fanu’s Carmilla is being created by Hammer Films by writer Tudor Gates (Death Is a Good Living, Better a Widow, Danger: Diabolik, Barbarella, The Vampire Lovers, Fright and Twins of Evil) showcases the depravity that lurks inside us all but especially young, prim and proper schoolgirls?   Not far from the uninhabited Castle Karnstein is a proper school for young girls that have been beseeched by black magic, Satanism and vampires.  An accomplished writer Richard Lestrange (Michael Johnson of The Human Jungle, Anne of a the Thousand Days, Homebodies, Crown Court and Perfect Scoundrels), a horror novelist is doing research for his next novel and the local villagers are warning him off from the Castle Karnstein and speak of every 40 years an unspeakable evil lurks through the land in the form of a vampire.  The legends speak of the sacrifice of an innocent blood to resurrect their wicked ancestors and bring for an age of darkness.

No I am not Paul McGann.

The local school houses an ancient vampiress now unbeknownst to all except for a few.  Yes this vampiress can WALK IN THE DAYLIGHT, be awake at all hours and seduces with a glance.   A young school girl Mircalla (Yutte Stensgaard Denmark nude model of The Girl with a Pistol, The Love Factor, Some Girls Do, Carry on Again Doctor, Scream and Scream Again and Doctor in Trouble) is perplexed to classmates missing, a local girl in town and even a teacher seems to have had a “heart attack” but her current attentions are on Lestrange as he has replaced the English instructor for this school and they both cannot cope with their feelings for one another.   

Yes now I must nitpick a bit about this film.  While this reign of terror is about; this would seem the ample time for copious amount of nudity, a over the top love scene where the orgasm brings Yutte to a cross eyed response to the tune of a tripe pop song entitled Strange Love.  This movie feels as though it stems away from the dignity of the Hammer Legacy and feels like the movie was rushed together providing far too much unexplained and how the royals move about without anyone questioning them at all.  They did not have any royal guards to speak of so revolting villagers could not have been thwarted in any sense of the manner.  There was more fog in this movie that John Carpenter’s The Fog and its remake combined, our blood looked garishly red and my god there were more heaving bosoms in this flick to rival soft core pornography.

Zombies? In the lake?? Heavens!

   

Vampire Grab Bag Week: Twins of Evil

Greetings all and a hearty welcome to Day 1 of the Vampire Grab Bag Week in the hopes we get some fun titles.  This week I just go on IMDB.com and randomly snag a vampire title and hope for the best.  Here is hoping we don’t end up with another Zombie Lake scenario because that was simply disturbing.  Today I chose a Hammer title so it will be a 50/50 chance of a classic to a blatant soft core naughty.  Fingers crossed we get a winner so let’s prep those crucifix; keep a torch handy and maybe a decent short sword for beheadings.  This is Twins of Evil.

If only I knew where my TARDIS was!

The Brotherhood is dedicated in eradicating spoilers throughout the world!

Part 3 of the Karnstein Trilogy produced by the Hammer Films, these films are named such as the vampires of the Karnstein family as their title seats at Castle Karnstein in Styria Austria and the flicks always seem to have a lesbian theme similar to its predecessors The Vampire Lovers and Lust for a Vampire.   Boy I sure can pick them.

Maria and Frieda Gellhorn (Mary and Madeleine Collinson the first identical twin Playmate sisters from October 1970) are recently orphaned teenage girls forced to move from the charming Venice to Karnstein to live with their astringent uncle Gustav Weil (Peter Cushing of Horror of Dracula, The Curse of Frankenstein, The Brides of Dracula, Dr. Who and the Daleks, Frankenstein Created Woman, Star Wars and Shock Waves) a puritan and leader of the Brotherhood, a collective of bible thumpers and witch hunters.  Both girls are less than thrilled with their new living conditions and contemplating escape.  Count Karnstein (Damien Thomas of The Message, Shogun, Pirates and Wish Me Luck and House of Cards) holds the Emperor’s ear and favor and has not fallen under sway of the Brotherhood and follows a far darker path of Satanism. 

A double pleasure's waiting for you...

To gain greater power the Count slays a girl for human sacrifice to bring forth his ancestor Countess Mircalla Karenstein (Katya Wyeth of Inspector Clouseau, A Clockwork Orange, Straight on Till Morning, Got It Made, Barry McKenzie Holds His Own and I’m Not Feeling Myself Tonight) from her grave and make him a vampire as well.   Imbued with his new found power our Count sets his sights on the lovely Frieda and Maria becomes smitten by her teacher Anton (David Warbeck of Hunter of the Apocalypse, The Black Cat, The Beyond, Sudden Fury and Razor Blade Smile).   While Frieda is tempted by darkness with the Count, Maria has a sweet innocent love blossoming with Anton.  Will these two girls ever be the same again?

Yes I have a few points to be made about the film.  Yes fellas there is more eye candy than a Playboy party, a fair degree of nudity and once again ladies yes you are getting snubbed on strapping fellows with the exception of the Count and Anton.  Granted there could be hot and bothered Peter Cushing fans but I have not met the like.  Acclaimed film critic Leonard Maltin attempted to give this film two and a half stars as the Collinson twins were very lovely and engaging in spite of their voices being dubbed in.  

My, your breasts are lovely in the torchlight.

Horror of 1970 Week: Scars of Dracula

What’s happenin’ babies?  Okay got that out of my system and welcome to Horror of 1970 Week.  This week we trowel some B Movies of the year and we shall see if we find any gems or diamonds in the rough rather than a polished turd.  So let’s commence with a Hammer Film of the vampiric nature starring our favorite Prince of Darkness, Dracula so fasten your crosses to a lapel, prep your rings of garlic and put an edge on that stake.  This is Scars of Dracula.

 

His eyes are so scary the credits tremble.

Klove: You fools!  You think you can destroy my spoiler??!!  The flames will never reach him!

As in the previous films there is of course the recap from its predecessor giving us the highlights of what was then and why the monster returns yet again to wreak chaos on the land and the villagers. We see Dracula’s remains, his cape and a pile of dried blood and dust left on the altar in said church.  Alice saved by Paul shudder at Dracula’s agonizing death and leave.   However, a large bat flies in the church dribbling blood from its fangs on to the powdered, desiccated remains only to resurrect the vampire once again.

Villager rabble and cookout!

A year later the villagers summon the nerve to attack the Castle Dracula after yet another village girl died at his hand and they burn the Castle while the Count is actually snoozing away in a crypt away from the castle.  After their arsonist deeds, the villagers return to find every woman and child hid in the church to be slaughtered by bats.  

Accused of raping the burgomasters’ daughter (she was spurned by Paul) Paul Carlson (Christopher Matthews of Some Like It Sexy, Scream and Scream Again and See No Evil) fled from the Kleinenberg officials by leaping into a handy coach and while it lacked a driver it takes off with great velocity.  The coach deposits him off to the slightly ruined Castle Dracula where the lord of manor and his mistress Tania (Anouska Hempel of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, Tiffany Jones and Black Snake).    After dinner and given his room to stay Tania and Paul…have a brief little liaison of the flesh when Dracula comes barging in, slaps Paul aside like a rag doll and skewers Tania with a dagger.  He locks Paul in his room and hands Tania to Klove (Patrick Troughton of Hamlet, Doctor Who, Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger, The Omen and Knights of God) to dispose of her.  Paul attempts an escape but is trapped in a room with a locked door and a coffin at his feet.

Now the frat's hazing can be...rough.

Sometime later Paul’s brother Simon (Dennis Waterman of The Sweeny, Sweeny!, Sweeny 2, Back in Business and New Tricks) and Paul’s fiancée Sarah (Jenny Hanley of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, The Flesh and Blood Show, Saturday Night at the Mill and West Country Tales) are attempting to retrace Paul’s whereabouts and remove this stigma on his good name.   The reluctance of the authorities makes Simon a bit concerned but little does he know what truly happens in this village.

I wanted to make a few points of interest in this film.  Christopher Lee has a lot more to do, better dialogue and still quite menacing.  The cinematography as always amazing and their collection of scale model and deep woods was so impressive and the landscape paintings were quite detailed. The violence is greater and sexuality a bit more freely than back in the day however I feel the ending is a bit anti-climatic as it feels like they were running out of ideas.   Just my take on it but if you are a Hammer fan give it some love and the once over.

Sci-Fi Fantasy Week: Captain Kronos- Vampire Hunter

Hello all and welcome back to Sci-Fi Fantasy Week and I found us a Hammer film of some repute.   With the fans of Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing a few Hammer films do escape the public eye especially if they are just looking to see Ingrid Pitt nude again. What say we regale stories of a traveling master swordsman and his humpback companion as they campaign against the undead?  Yes strop us some stakes, prep the holy water and gather some garlic flowers.  This is Captain Kronos- Vampire Hunter

Dead toads confuses the vampire you see and...oh forget it.

Heironymous Grost: You see, doctor, there are as many spoilers of vampire as there are beasts of prey. Their methods and their motive for attack can vary in a hundred different ways.

With his village on under siege from a virulent plague, Dr. Marcus (John Carson of Taste the Blood of Dracula, Emma, Oppenheimer, Doctor Who and Survivor) almost dismisses the notion that the plague attack these young girls is actually vampires and sends for his old Imperial Army friend Captain Kronos (Horst Janson of You Can’t Win ‘Em All, The Captain, Shout at the Devil, Storm of Love and Destruction of Silence) an adept swordsman and would you believe it, a vampire hunter?  Travelling with Kronos is his faithful companion Professor Heironymous Grost (John Cater of Orlando, The Avengers, The Abominable Dr. Phibes, Dr. Phibes Rises Again,  the Woman in Black and Where the Heart Is) an expert on all things Vampire and how to dispatch them. 

What hump?

Now before you all start screaming not another vampire movie, let us point out a few things.  These vampires appear in hoods even during the mid day and seem to drain not blood but life and youth from their victims.  Most mythology buffs or even Stargate Atlantis fans would be saying wraith about now and I cannot say I fault them.  

Along the road to Marcus’ village Kronos spots a young girl Carla (Carolyn Munro of Dracula A.D. 1972, Star Crash, The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, The Spy Who Loved Me, Maniac and Slaughter High) in pillory for a meager crime, Kronos chooses to free her and be off on his way when she asks to join him and Grost to their next destination.  Kronos and Grost prep their litmus test for vampire detection using a series of dead toads in the road, forcing them walk around and prepare to waste the creatures but no clue so far to the unspeakable foul beast or beasts’ lair.   The town has been living in fear of this curse and few choose to speak out.  The most influential of the village are in seclusion and have no interest with interaction on the day to day leads Kronos to believe perhaps the vampire is hiding on their property.   I personally thought they were prigs and uptight.

Vampire Hunter and Eye Candy? Bonus.

A few things I wanted to mention about the movie.   Shot in 35mm Spherical and audio done in Mono, writer/director Brian Clemens (The Golden Voyage of Sinbad, Quiller, The New Avengers, The Watcher in the Woods, Timestalkers and Blue Blood) must have felt the vampire folklore angle being more of a superstitious nature into the story was a nice touch; keeping in tradition that there is always a sliver of truth in every tale.  

NINJA STRIKE!!!!

Our hooded menace feasting on the local wenches is not revealed until towards the end of the film giving it a bit of suspense.  The dialogue was sharp and clever with a nice leisurely pace of films of its ilk but it certainly did not skimp on the action at all and for the life of me I cannot see how this did not go the same franchise route the Dracula series did.   Guess even Hammer Film fans are fickle.

Hammer Features Week: The Curse of Frankstein

Greetings my fine cadre of readers welcome back to Day 4 of Hammer Features Week.  Again we will investigate the collection of Hammer Films to see they tapped into Mary Shelly’s finest creation.  So prep the kite with a key, prime the electrodes and throw the third switch.  This is The Curse of Frankenstein.

Whatever do you mean NO MORE COFFEE!!!

Baron Frankenstein: I’ve spoiled nobody, just robbed a few graves!

Our cinematic feature opens with Baron Victor Frankenstein (Peter Cushing of Horror of Dracula, The Blood Beast Terror, Carnage, The Vampire Lovers, Dr. Who and the Daleks, Twins of Evil, Star Wars and Shock Waves) awaits his execution for murder and he chooses to tell the story of his life to a priest (Alex Gallier of Flame and the Flesh, Million Dollar Manhunt, Thunder Over Tangier, The Revenge of Frankenstein and The Man Inside) hearing his final confession.

As a young lad Victor’s father passed on at an early age in his life leaving him the estate and title of Frankenstein.  While overwhelming a friend of the family Paul Krempe(Robert Urquhart of Battle Hell, Dunkirk, Armchair Theatre, Jango, The Plane Makers and The Pathfinders) assists Victor in his experimental endeavors as they bring a dog back from the dead.  So naturally the next step is a human, right?

Christopher Lee when he wakes in the morning.

Victor begins to fasten his own creation from scavenged remains of the dead and even so far as slaying a distinguished professor through what is perceived as an accidental death.  He is most successful in his creation but Krempe leaves disgusted with the manner Victor has acquired his creature (Christopher Lee of Horror of Dracula, The Devil’s Agent, Horror Castle, Castle of the Living Dead, Dracula A.D. 1972 and The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring).  Bad form to loot from the dead old boy and the two gents scuffle and damage the brain in its jar the creature is violent and psychotic.  They vow to lock it up for now but it inevitably escapes and crushes an old man in the woods.  Both Victor and Krempe hunt down the creature, shoot it and bury it the woods.  Yeah that won’t come and bite them in their ass.

Now I have just a few highlights of the movie if you will.    The original notion of the movie was to be done in black and white but Universal Studios raised a big stink and said it would ruin the classic Universal version with Boris Karloff so Hammer had to retune the script as well as shoot the film in Eastmancolour (the first European Technicolor 35mm Spherical).  Christopher Lee and Peter Cushing met professionally for the first time on the set of this film and developed a rapport and friendship until Cushing’s demise in 1994.    

Yes yes, I am vile and diabolical...but how is my port?

This of course is the first Frankenstein movie to be filmed in color setting precedence to this day.  Doctor Who alumni Patrick Troughton appeared in a cameo as a gravedigger and while the good fellow was credited to most of the early publicity material; his scenes were cut from the finished production.   I hear he egged the sets and flew off in the TARDIS before getting reprimanded.