Case of Financial Woe: Chapter 4

Hey folks!   Sorry for the writing blog delays.  The editing for a movie review takes me at least two to three days overall, so here's a continuation in Case of Financial Woe.  Enjoy!

Chapter 4

A cultured Spanish voice inquired, "Senor Malone?" I scooted my chair back and pointed the Sig right at his stomach, "Tell your goons to drop their cannons in the front room, then everyone comes in nice and easy." "Do you always do business at gunpoint, Senor Malone?" I smirked, "It's a tough racket and I might not always want to hear what the potential client has to say. Drop the rods and grab a seat, fellas. Last warning." Reluctantly the apes dropped a Desert Eagle .44 and a Ruger Blackhawk. Good God. Were they expecting grizzly bears in my office?

Thugs 1 and 2 took seats on either side of their boss as he causally sat down and removed his hat revealing a slowly thinning head of hair and placed his hat in his lap. "Look Mr. Motoya, it's not that I am not glad to see you but we've had some friction in the past." Montoya sneered at this. "Friction? Malone you held my associates and I at gunpoint, called the cops on us and then took pictures of us being hauled away." He sighed. "Let the past be the past, Malone. I have need of a detective to find a man."

I damn near laughed. I held it in but snickered a bit. "Yeah I think you can find a much larger sucker than me." Montoya looked irked. "We came here to discuss business like civilized men. If you do not care for the proposal, I will leave and not return." With an incredulous scowl on my face, I ventured. "And if by some small miracle I agree, you what? Smoke the guy I find for you? Not sure I can live with that at any price."

Montoya leaned back in his chair at ease. "Not only will you recieve a substantial fee but I will owe you one. The man I wish found has stolen from me and he has...what is term? Ah besmirched my name! I will have what is mine and you turn him to police, yes?"

I try to hide my smirk rapidly approaching my face. "Let me get this straight. You want to hire me to track down a former "associate" of yours, giving him over to you, doing God knows what and I should take my money and keep quiet?"

Montoya stirred in his chair. I reminded him of the sig in my hand by cocking the hammer back.

"My professional advice, Mr. Montoya is to find a less moral P.I.and offer him the same terms. No I will not call the officials because technically you have not committed a crime. I think you need to leave and you will leave your hardware on my floor."

Thugs 1 and 2's gaze got shifty like they were actually going to dive for their cannons when Montoya cleared his throat, straightened his tie clip (silver of course) and placed his fedora on his head and proceeded to carefully leave his chair. "Very well." He turned to face his goons and with a head nod assured them they will get replacement cannons. Five minutes tick by as they all left my office. I finally exhale and put the hammer back. Yeah that wasn't too stressful. So I have the US Marshals pissed off, a con man's kill happy gunsel and now the lieutenant of the Montoya syndicate looking rather annoyed with me.

Yup when it rains, it strikes the ground with lighting and fries everything in its path. Also it pours.

I glance over what I know thus far. Chet is looking to burn the Montoyas and the feds are trying to close the noose around their necks. This info has to be juicy enough for them to take it serious but they won't argee to scumbag Chet's wishlist. Chet being the decent soul that he is hires his Moose and Jimmy the knife nut that wants me or should I say, my cover ID gone. Reynolds and Clarke sat on my place for at least a couple of hours but didn't know my client and yet figured out who I was.

I never met those guys until today so who circulated my pic to them? Did they make a trip downtown to my favorite precinct? Did that little prick Marsden show them my file? God dammit.

Once again I play pool and I'm behind the 8 ball. Well the mob are honked off, I loathe Bishop so that's out. The cops won't be much help and the feds can kiss my ass.

Time to go bend Chatty Charlie's ear. If I hustle I can catch him at Shooter's. I speed dial and head out the office. "Shooter's. Shelby speaking." Somethings will never change. "Hey Shelby, Malone here. Charlie in?" Shelby snorted. "Yeah and he's sharking the tables again. Some of dem hipsters are gettin' their asses handed to them." A gin graced my face as I unlocked the Impala. "Well I am in route. Let him know, would you?" "Sure thing, kid. See ya when we see ya."

A quick hop on the freeway and I am in Shooter's parking lot. Not so odd considering the hour. Not that many hardcore drinkers at 2 in the afternoon. Before I go any further, I turn off my smart ass smartphone and pull the memory card. Paul once told me the easiest way to trace a guy is to bounce a signal using cell towers to triangulate a perp's location. Well I'm not the bad guy but these cats don't seem to realize that. If I am going to make any headway in this with Baker, I am going to need Charlie's help.

People look at Charlie, they see an 40 to 50 pounds overweight drunk in a velure track suit and a pool cue. Me? I see the man with his fingers on the pulse of the underworld. Charlie knows so many crooked cats, cops and mouth pieces it is a wonder he doesn't know what's going down in Hell right now. From a package boy to running numbers in the day, to info and pool sharking, if Charlie doesn't know then it's not happening. Hell Charlie and Clancy were kids in the neighborhood in Chi Town. Guess Clancy couldn't ever give up on Charlie.

Coming in the front, the smell of smoke, whiskey and beer hang in the air. This watering hole brings back memories. Some good, some bad and all the ones inbetween.

I give a nod to Shelby. Ex-Marine 25 years in, 6 foot 5 black with a shaved head and enough scar tissue you'd think he was in a fire. I think he's almost 55 now? All I know is no one fucks with Shelby in his own bar. Under the counter is a pair of twin Colts and a very illegal Mossberg with a magazine giving him 8 rounds of double ought buckshot. Arms and legs as thick as rolled carpet. This is one gay man very few have the balls to mock. I see he is back into his martini shirts and khakis again. I belly up to the bar. "Geeze Shelby, you watch a Burn Notice marathon or something?" I saw out of the corner of my right eye some of the patrons scoot down from the tops and away.

"Hey punk. You wear anything but suits in 80 degree weather?" I smiled. "Fair enough. How the hell are you Shelby?" "Kid I barely got hit on at all this week. Starting to lose my touch." he stated sliding me and Charlie's scotches, light ice.

I scooped up the drinks, sliding $40 on the bar top and had a chuckle burp up. " Hell if I wasn't already seeing someone, Shelby I'd give you a pester."

"Scram kid, yer bothering me," Shelby exaggerated in a horrific impression of W.C. Fields.

It's not that the inflections were dead on, it's the trachia scar that makes Shelby sound like the Kurgan in Highlander. I've never had the balls to ask him how he got it because...well he would tell me and probably scar me for life in the process.

Moseying around the tables, eyes slightly tearing up from all the smoke pluming in the air, I spotted Charlie smoking a table filled with hipsters standing mouths wide open as he clears the table. I dont't think the little pukes even got to play. Begrudgely they toss their money down and put up their sticks. Charlie maybe getting older, the bursitis is kicking in but his reflexes on the green felt never looked better. I think he lost a bit of weight since last I saw him. "Come back again if you want a rematch," Charlie bellowed and the kids stomped off and out the door. I cocked my head at him shaking it in disbelief, "When are you going to give these kids a chance, Charlie?" Charlie swung his head around and with a broad grin replied, "Hey Jakey, I let them break first. Not my fault if they suck."

I just smiled in response. I mean you can't argue with his logic. The man is a pool hall legend and every young buck keeps trying to knock him down a peg or two. "How's Madge?" Charlie slumped to a stool. "She's got me on this macrobiotic diet or she's tossing me out on my ass. Don't get me wrong, the food's okay but she's harping about my drinking again." I smirked, "Well Charlie maybe she just wants to keep you around a little longer." Scoffing, Charlie swung his scotch back for a gulp. "I tell ya Jakey, it's gettting so a man can't have no vices no more. Toss me a smoke and let's hear it."

I opened the silver cigarette case Tom got for me and presented a smoke for Charlie, struck a match with my thumb and lit it. "So what's the worry, kid? You look nervous as Hell." So I laid it out for him plenty. The client's problem, the scumbag, the visit from Montoya and even the WitSec scuffle. Charlie seemed to be taking it all in stride. I swear the archangel Michael could roll up in here, flaming sword in hand, dispatching sinners and Charlie wouldn't blink. Tough old bird.

Charlie puffed a bit, mulling it around and I could see he knew the score once again. "Well kid, it's like this. Montoyas' goon squad has been looking for your boy Chet for over a month. He's kept well hidden where he hangs his hat but you know it is only a matter of time before they find him." I nodded thinking why the hell haven't they scoped out La Jolla. Then it dawns on me that is Caprici territory and reigning lieutenant, John Bishop would have them cut up into parcel sized packages and set back to the family with postage due.

"So Charlie, how much jack is involved finding this cat's whereabouts?" Charlie thought about it for a moment, "Well my boy, I could take Madge on that Carnival cruise she wants to go on free and clear. $50 gees last I checked." I choked on my scotch for a couple of minutes, coughed and righted myself. "Okay, then with that hanging over his head, why doesn't he take the deal and get out of town? I am scratching my head on that one." Charlie smirked a toothy grin, "Kid, you know them feds ain't gonna let him hold on to any of that con money or whatever swag he bought with it. The guy's had a taste of the lifestyle out here and he wants to get fat."

"Yeah but they need this little prick, his info and testimony so why the fuck is it taking so long to toss him in Arizona or Omaha with a new name and house? You'd think they would transfer some of his dough to an account or something."

Charlie just shook his head. "Nah kid. They make an exception like that and before you know it, the goobahs and the goodfellas that want out but still living large is going to be on Johnny Taxpayers' dime. Nothing doin'."

I looked at my watch for the time. Still three hours before my meet and greet with Gruber. I'd better scout out the location prior. I tossed the usual cabbage to Charlie plus a couple hundred extra. "You're a prince among men, Charlie. I got to jet." "Thanks Jakey. Hey Madge wants you over for supper. I think she's found you yet another girl to look at." "I'll call you if work gets less screwy this week. Bye Charlie."

Got back behind the Impala, starting piecing it together. Why would Baker roll on Montoyas if he thought the feds couldn't work with him? Why haven't they pressed him for the info? What is the end game? Why would Montoya, a guy who loathes me even offer to pay me to rat Baker out? Who the hell did Madge find this time to lump me with?

I drove down to the Broadway, locked up the ride and made my way through the food court area. I love how when clandestine meetings go down the guy that agrees too eagerly to the terms thinks you'll sit and kill time until the meeting happens. Like those are the rules or something. Three hours is long enough to put together a force to nab, apprehend or even bump me off if needed. Maybe I have just dealt with too many mobsters, pimps, drug kingpins but you tend to trust your instincts when it comes to dealing with men in power.

A cursory glance around the court shown more than 4 guys in sunglasses in tacky civvies monitoring the area with newspapers in hand, some walking about and window shopping but you can read between the lines. I ducked back towards the comic store on second level and spotted a "couple" walking a bit ridgid and their off the rack coats didn't conceal their bulges very well. Oh yeah Gruber wasn't taking any chances on this one at all. So what's the deal? He can't be serious in nabbing me up and keeping me on ice. He's not Hoover and his authority for this clearly less than legal maneuver must have him scared about something.

I putter around in the shop for a few minutes, browsing back issues I'd actually buy but on the job prevents such bliss. Instead I get a Hellboy ballcap and wear it out of the store, exiting down the walk ramp and head towards the parking lot. No need to go rushing to the Impala. Look cool and calm and no one questions your motives. My SEAL buddy, Ecarde taught me the fine art of hiding in plain sight. Fiddle with a phone, wear clothes appropriate the scenario and occasionally play "Lost Tourist" and no one thinks anything of it. Now if you are trained to spot details, movement and expressions on a perp's face, you know that no everyone can keep their cool. A $25 dollar hat and just causal walking allowed me to leave their sting operation. Hmm, now that I know that is in play, how do I handle it? Quiet, diginity and grace? Loud and obnoxious? Do I drop dime to the cops I think there is something shady going on near Fuddruckers?

Could also point out to Ray that the FBI is probably wondering why WITSEC is going to this length. I mean I don't know the ins and outs of their jurisdiction but plotting a snatch and grab cannot be legal in the least. I text Ray on my burner what's going on at Broadway and tell him I won't provoke them too terribly. I place a call to Gruber's office with my cell and his secretary tells me to she'll connect us in just a minute or so. Back at the office, I notice no lumbering shapes of terror looming about.

A couple of minutes tick by as I am subjected to muzak via Hungry like the Wolf. No justice in the world sometimes. Gruber finally picks up and sounds flustered. "Yes, Mr. Malone? Is there something we needed to discuss before the meeting?" "You sound a little out of breath, Special Agent Gruber. Everything alright?" I can envision wrinkles forming on his face. "You are well aware of the situation at hand and my need to resolve quickly so I may get back to work."

I grinned. "Yeah about that. I am stuck at the office filing at least a dozen reports right now. I just wanted to make sure you knew it may take me longer than I predicted. Perhaps we should shoot for another time?" Gruber cleared his throat and I heard the sound of kids shouting and playing in the background. Fun fact, did you know cheaper cellphones have an omni-directional microphone that picks up a lot of sound? Guessing his Cricket is doing just that as he regains his composure.

"I'm sorry, what?" he burbled. I felt a smile and I hoisted the sound of warm telemarketer voice. "It's just with you handling your case load, dealing with subordiants and whatever else your job entails, you can't be drug out of your office at a moment's whim. I am thinking you're right I should just come down to your office, I'm heading out the door now." Gruber sounding like he was choking on a big piece of steak came back with, "Well see here now...I'm, I'm right in the middle of something on my cases and can't be bothered...right now...that is."

With the same jovial tone, "Oh it's no worry, Special Agent Gruber. I can wait in the lobby untill you are ready to recieve me, unless today's just not good for you either."

You could almost hear the beads of sweat dribbling down his presumbly chubby face with all the hard b's he has been attempting to conceal. Tersely he came back with, "Mr. Malone! We have an agreement! We meet at 4 o'clock at the Broadway at of all places, the Fuddruckers." "Well I do enjoy a good burger and fries. I just rethought the whole situation and felt I was being entirely too harsh. To offer an olive branch if you will. I could even swing by Fuddruckers on my way to your office and snag you some dinner." I made sure he could hear my car door unlock.

"NO! That is...that won't be necessary, Mr. Malone. Just meet me down at the mall at 4 would be fine." Gruber blurted out. My God, how long as it been since he was on a sting?

"Okay well I guess I could just head there, maybe fine a book to read and wait for you there," I said starting up the car. "Sorry got to put you on hands free." "Mr. Malone...um...yes well." Gruber was afraid the gig was up and trying to rally a new course of action. I hadn't the heart to end this little show. More entertaining than anything on HULU right now.

"Say Agent Gruber, can you close the door to your office. I can't believe how busy it sounds there." I actually had to bite my tongue hearing him run to I am guessing the bathroom to continue his ruse.

Within a minute I hear a bit of panting. Our boy must be more out of shape than I thought. The moment I heard a gasp it echoed like a cathedral or a ceramic tiled bathroom with enough reverb to be worthy of an auditorium. "Alright, Mr. Malone I have had quite enough of this. We are going to meet at the designated place...at... the designated time. Am I understood?" I let it hang in the air for a moment trying to stifle a laugh. Tears rolling down my eyes, "Well Agent Gruber, I was just hoping for some plain old fashioned honesty and not a ruse." "Excuse me?!" Gruber barked back. I smirked. "A ruse. That bit of cunning to orchestrate a trap or ensnarement."

Gruber sounded as though he wanted to rip my nuts off and force me to wear them as earrings. "YES! I know what a ruse is! What is your point?"

Finally I couldn't hold it back. I started snickering in the phone. "What is so DAMN FUNNY?!!" Gruber added, his tone vibrating against the tiles again. "Sorry I am just envisioning you in a bathroom getting irate and your voice ringing isn't helping. So do you write all your reports on the can or just when your stomach acts up?"

Gruber went silent. "I'm. I'm not sure what you mean." Piping up before an even more pathetic lie crept into conversation, "Fun fact, Agent Gruber. Some cheaper model cellphones have an omni-directional microphone that picks up background noises something fierce. So unless your office is Spanish tiled, you sound as though you ducked into the head." Gruber sputtered a bit and I continued on. "See I went with an smartphone myself. Pocket sized computer, phone, great net surfing tool and I am warming to the apps."

Gruber finally had enough. "Who the hell do you think you are, Mr. Malone? You call me to mock me about an agent that may or may not have been in his right mind, you demand this audience at a Fuddruckers and now you are changing the time of the meeting? Just who the fuck do you think you are messing with??!! By God I will have your license pulled, your ass thrown in jail and maybe even your business closed. Yes I think with the right strings even the IRS will look at you funny!" Sounding shocked, "Why Special Agent Gruber, what are you saying?"

Frustrated and clearly out of patience, "I'm saying if I can't have you banned from the P.I. Business, maybe I will just have you shot for the sake of National security!" Just then, it dawned on him. I went quiet and let him sweat.

"Oh. Oh my God. My God you are recording this, aren't you?" Just rubbing my index finger and thumb on my right temple. "Hey, now. There's a plan. Kind of like a clearly less than legal snatch and grab at say...oh probably a mall next to a family restaurant? Which of course is by the book if I were a guy that ducked out of WITSEC. Of course I'm not so just looks as though your brute squad is standing around in this heat waiting to snag a private citizen."

Gruber back to making his motorboat sounds, "Now s-see here..." I interrupted, "Nope, this is how this is going down. This recording goes next to the previous one. Already stopped recording and submitting it to every national newspaper in the country. You want this black mark? You start explaining yourself damn quick, alone and now a new time and place. I catch even a whiff of your stooges and Agent Reynolds and you can both share some cell time together. Decide." I hung up letting it sink in.

Shockingly enough my cell blew up with Gruber's cell number. Meh, swipe left.

A quick dial to Bernie Libowitz, my attorney and I sent him both digital copies of my harassment.

"Jakey my boy, you trying to put me in the grave? Why can't you be a mench and find a lost dog or long lost relative for a will? My uclers hate you."

"Well Bernie, if detective work was easy, everyone would be doing it. Hold on to that. You don't hear from me in two days, you sling that damning recordings all over. Leak it to papers, the news, the net. Hell chuck it at Twitter for all I care."

"Alright kid. You've got yourself one fine mess but I will see what I can do. Watch yourself."

"Thanks Bernie. You're a good man. See ya."

Hanging up with Bernie I am still unclear what to do about Montoya. I check out the window to see any obvious black SUVs again and thus far nothing. That could just mean they're up the block. I lock my office but left the front open as per usual. Passing the dentist office I can see Doc Mitchell passing out some sugar free candy to a 5 year old as he gabbed with the boy's mother.

Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted me so I flipped him off just to see him get beet red.

Yup the little things in life really give you joy.

Down the block I walk nice and slow to see if I have any activity coming my way and shoot a message to my favorite skirt chaser Ex-SEAL and give him the lowdown. From my burner, duh. I don't know if Gruber can arrange a tap on my phones, home, office and cell but I am not taking any chances. We settled for a quick trip to Mr. D's. Being only just shy of 3, the joint should be fairly calm but enough background noise to drown out YET another conversation I rather not heard.

Paul looked good. I swear the man should be swinging a beer and a shot belly by now but he runs every day, hits the weights and I think he's even in a spin class. Gotta be for the spandex clad girls to oggle. Looks like he recently dyed his hair back to the brunette of his youth and sporting yet another blinding martini poly-silk blended shirt and khakis. There ought to be a law against that much rayon.

I slide a scotch neat as he bellied up to the bar, we clinked glasses and took back a pull. I'm not a heavy drinker by nature but this job could drive you to chugging paint thinner some days. Paul was all smiles but it didn't quite reach his eyes when he saw my hound dog face. "Alright kid, one of these days we just go to a ball game or cruise for chicks. Deal?" "Hell Paul, I think that sounds a ton better than what's on my plate." We sipped our scotches and I gave him the full skinny. Paul's good people and I am not about to bullshit him. He's earned my trust tenfold.

Paul scratched his stubble beard giving this all some thought. "So your client, is she stacked?" I nearly choked on my drink. "Christ Ecarde, is that all you took away from this? " I wheezed out. Paul shot me a grin not unlike that of every used car salesman that has screwed me over and replied, "Well sure, kid. You in a pickle, suits are getting in your business and you managed to piss off the mob again. Now back to her funbags." With a face palm later I reluctantly agreed, my client was a looker but I try my damnedest to never mix business and pleasure.

"Okay, I know a guy that owes me since Desert Storm. Pulled his ass out the frying pan. Lemme make a couple of calls and see what's what. Be right back." I waved and ordered another round. Looking around at the afternoon crowd was mostly college kids playing some pool, a few near-do-wells talking in booths and at the bar mirror I spotted it. A black GM SUV, tinted windows and they were down for peeping. Thankfully at this hour, the sun's glare off the glass makes that two-way window difficult to make out anything. Why Mr. D's needs that for the customers? Hell I don't know. I barely get by with search engines most days.

A stunning black girl at the end of the bar seemed to be engrossed in a Anne Rice novel with a martini that looked barely touched. Either that or she passed on the ice. Tall, lean muscle and leggy I can't begin to believe no one has talked to her. Before I can muster looking less dishoveled, Paul made his way back, slipped his cell in his pocket and downed what was left his drink in a gulp.

Signaling the redhead behind the bar for another, he clasped my shoulder. "Well buddy I've got good news, bad news and what you come to expect. What do you want first?"

"Oh God, this is going to hurt." I thought. Fuck it. "Alright, bad news me, Paul." "Bad news is Baker's case looks like it's getting tossed. Without the crucial evidence that he is holding, the boys upstairs aren't interested in helping his scum bag ass out so this will be all over in less than a week." I frowned. "Wait, that's the bad news?" Paul sipped some more scotch. "Well buddy the good news is, it looks like Montoya didn't put a contract out on you after all so yeah happy times."

I blinked in disbelief. "Paul, what does your "friend" do?" He smirked with a cherise grin, "Oh a little of this, little of that. Not entirely...legal persay but.." "Yeah I get it." I interrupted. "Okay so what is the news you come to expect then?" Back to scratching that Don Johnson stubble, Paul looked cagey. "Well, skuttlebutt saying in-house shakedown. Not sure but seems like someone at WITSEC is dolling info out to the Montoyas because it is too ripe. If I had to guess I'd say someone is getting fat from the Montoyas giving up people."

My stomach just sank. It's so crazy but it makes damn good sense. Gruber is losing witnesses to what? Contract killers? 10-to-1 their common link is the Montoyas doing dirty deeds, seeing it in action and afraid for their lives. Gruber is piss scared his investigations, witnesses and probably career are all on the line. I glanced at my cell. 25 messages all Gruber. I guess I better rethink this strategy with him. Damn. He might be an overbearing asshole but he might also be one of the good guys.

"You okay, kid?" Paul asked around a glass. I rubbed my forehead. "Yeah it really does put things in perspective. Okay, assuming Gruber isn't the guy on the take and going on a further limb, assuming he is trying to find his mole, what the hell can I do? I'm not qualified for this. Shit, I am hard pressed to think of a guy that could fix this."

Gulping scotch down I placed the glass down for a refill. Paul's never one to sugar coat things of dire importance but God I wished he did this time. I looked up to realize he left to pester that gorgeous girl at the corner. Dammit not again. The man is a poacher. Not like I called dibs or something like that but just once he could keep his libido in check. I start watching him go into his speil and she placed her bookmark away, saving her page. It just hit me. She's not under his spell.

I think she is just letting him ramble and schmooze as he knows how to what? Pass the time? Idle entertainment? She reaches in her purse, pulling out a ten placing it on the counter then turns to face the master. I can't read lips but I think she is... Heh. She is graciously turning him down. Wow.

She walks with the fluidity of someone who enjoys a good stroll. Dressed in a light sweater and jeans with deep brown eyes. No, they're hazel, a smile that could melt butter and a carefree attitude, she walks over...to me? Huh?

This tall drink of water looks down where I am sitting and casually leans a hand out. "Janine." I took her hand gently. "Huh?" "My name. You've got one?" "Uh yeah, Jake." "Hi Jake." "Hi Janine. What can I do for you?" "Oh you can ask your friend to be a little less forward." I glanced at Paul giving me slumped shoulders and the what the hell expression and stared back at this goddess among men. "Yeah he's. He can be a bit full of himself but harmless. Mostly harmless."

This got another dazzling smile out of her. I noticed a slight tinge of red to her hair. I couldn't say it was bottled or a weave. I'm really a doof when it comes to treatments.

"Well his friend seems nice enough, Jake. I am going to need that hand back through." (internal scream) AHHHHHH!!!!!!! I smile and relaxed my grip. "Sorry. Been a bit of a day, well a few days now."

She snatches up a cocktail napkin, producing a metal ballpoint pen and hands me the napkin with a few words, "I am giving you this and you decide what you'll do with it. Nice meeting you, Jake." And before I can reply she pivots her curvy hips with a saunter that was easy on the eyes. A minute later I looked down at the napkin. Yup, that is definitely a phone number. I'm a detective. I notice details.

The Case of Financial Woe Chapter 3

Hey folks!  Sorry for the absence here.  I have really taken a liking to the audio reviews that I have forgotten to post any written work on the blog.  To tide you over, I present the next chapter of The Case of Financial Woe.  Enjoy.   I will also post the audio review on here as well.

Chapter 3

Well I was wondering how long before this happened. I turned off the ride and slid out nice and slow so my large federal officer didn't have any just cause to go for a sidearm or slam me into my car. He looked mid-thirties, clean shaved and crew cut with a tailored suit to conceal his shoulder holster rig. As taunt as the suit was I am certain he didn't have an ounce of body fat to go with it.

Seriously, this guy was solid. "How can I help you, Agent Reynolds?" Reynolds seemed taken back but then realized he just showed me his credentials less than a minute ago. "You can start by dropping this case on one Chet Baker and that will suffice." "Uh huh. Well I don't see that being a problem as I am after a con man name of Raymond Mezrich. Seems he has acquired less than legal holdings which he has laundered through real estate to make it squeaky clean."

Reynolds looked less than happy at this point. "Yes Mr. Malone you will need to leave him alone as well. You are interfering with an ongoing series of investigations and we would urge you to cease all activities in this nature." I scratched my chin noticing Agent No Name circling around my car and peering into it. Not actually taking stock of anything but I don't care for the action.

"Of course I won't be compensated nor will my client be given the satisfaction of seeing this man going to jail. That about right?" Reynolds now looking annoyed, crossed his rolled carpet thick arms and gave me a glare. "Mr. Malone. You have been ordered by a United States official to back off an ongoing investigation or we will have problems." " Agent Reynolds. Are you threatening me with physical violence and/or to my profession?" "I'm saying jackass, walk away from this or I put you in a hurt locker, slap you with fines and make sure your license gets taken away from you. Now your client's name. I need explain why this issue has to be dropped."

I fixed him with a mediocre scowl I usually reserve when the bank teller says I don't have enough funds in my account than they prefer. " My client is confidential, you have no supeona, no probable cause or for that matter any jurisdiction over me and I do not feel inclined to speak on this matter any further. Good day. I moved off my car and Reynolds pushed me back on it, getting up in my face. "Look dammit. I am a Federal officer and everything sneaky bit of peeping you do in your so-called "profession" can be exactly my business if you don't start cooperating." No Name spoke up. "Take it easy, Blake. Kid's just watching out for his client." "Blow me Clarke."

Reynolds swiped his shades off to reveal an extremely pissed off set of steely blue eyes glaring through me as it was supposed inspire either fear of God or just an involuntary need to shit my pants. "Now start talking or I will rain hell down on you, you'll beg to be thrown in jail." I took his massive hands off my jacket, smoothed out the material and shot him the glance I give when my bank's current balance is greater than my available balance. I muttered soft but audibly, "So assault, verbal abuse and threatening my livelihood is supposed to make me roll over? Man you either have no idea with whom you are speaking with or you think that you stride across water. Now back off."

Well that did it as Reynolds swung a fist at my head. I ducked at the last minute letting him punch Detroit steel, darted out of his range and moved around the front of the car. Agent Clarke came up behind Reynolds in a bear hug trying to calm him down. "Jesus Reynolds! Let it go!" Two minutes of this grappling continued and I had enough.

I opened my jacket, slid my phone out, hit stop and send directly to Tom's account.

I smiled almost Chesire like and glared at Reynolds. So stopping to fix my tie, I decided to break the news.

"Well Agent Reynolds, what we have here is a bit of a situation. I left my phone to record with this nifty attached microphone during your "polite" intentions. It is now pointed out your abuse of authority, an attempt at assault and your need to vent your spleen."

Reynolds went slack in Clarke's arms. He looked like he wanted to kick my nuts up into my throat. His mouth started to open but I continued on. "Furthermore this scuffle just got sent to a very shrewd, capable writer who digs dirt until he finds gold. How long will it take him with his various contacts to find out which department you are from, your supervisor and whether or not you have a career afterwards? My humble advice is you already warned me off and that should suffice. Anything else happens is out of your hands." I beamed at him with my smile that can only be used when encountering a hideous baby.

Reynolds, not thrilled with this outcome shrugged Clarke off his arms and walked up to me. I drew my Sig out of my opened jacket. "Don't." Reynolds and Clarke both froze. "I don't normally have to deal with anyone on this level but I won't trust a damn thing you do or say. Back up and go around the car. I don't aim this at you unless you come a step further." Reynolds went with a feral gaze. "And how will you explain gunning down two federal officers, Mr. Malone?" I replied coldly, "If all things go as I asked, I will never have tell that tale. Last warning, back off Reynolds."

Not completely able to gauge my skill versus they're being 8 feet away, the boys kept their hands down and circled the car slowly. True to my word, I didn't aim or cock the hammer back as they went down the street. "You won't get away with this," Reynold felt the need to fire at me. "Well I'm the guy that was harassed by law enforcement, my lawyer would have a field day with this batch of legal nasties. You've made your point, Reynolds. Now I invite you to leave."

Clarke put Reynolds in the passenger seat after clearly chastising him. What was said I didn't heard but the general vibe was shut up and get in the car. I point the Sig back on the hip holster, glad I didn't have to use it but damn if that wasn't close. Whatever Mezrich was into has enough people worried that a guy that probably isn't this high strung just lost his cool in a big rush. So now becomes the question: Do I stay the course or do I return my client's money and walk away?

I don't like disappointing my clients but sometimes life isn't a gritty Raymond Chandler novel. The Lincoln pulled out and they were off. Presumbly to fix this mondo clusterfuck of an event and smooth things over with their boss. I failed to mention to them both I already knew they were U.S. Marshals with Witness Protection. I thought depriving them of that particular detail might put them at ease. About an hour from now their higher up is going to invite me over for some polished ass kissing seen only from James Spader's performance in Maniquin.

Steady to course, Jake. You know you don't have to behave the way they want you to but you got to tread these waters carefully. Chances are they were tailing him and not me so they haven't any bugs or tails on me so far. Nevertheless I headed back into the office to burn Baker's greatest hits on a thumb drive and hide in my safe. I called Ms Dietrich and gave her the whole story. I told her if she wanted to give this still a go then I will and how I do such will she would not be privvy to that information. The less she knows, the less the feds can climb into her ass about. Rule #1: Protect the client.

After about two minutes pause she finally agreed that I continue on. I thanked her for the blessing and informed her I would be in touch. She decided I might need some discretion funds and will have a courier sent to deliver it personally. Smart, lovely, available and wealthy. Why can't I ever meet that unprofessionally?

Forty minutes ticked by at the office and of course I got a ring from Tom. "So this on the level?" "Hi to you too, Tom. Oh I'm fine and how are you?" "Dude you answered the phone so you are not dead, in jail or maimed. Is this on the level?" "Yes and no. The agent in question was so enraged he couldn't think or see straight. A lot is riding on Baker's testimony I think and some serious fish are looking to get netted. Baker isn't satisfied with the terms so the Marshals are probably massaging out those details or they will cut ties altogether"

Tom sighed. "So nothing beyond what we know already then?" "Bro I don't even know who he'd be ratting out in the first place. So quid pro qo?" Tom smiled with a pleasant voice of the cat that got the canary, "Okay ace detective. You remember a fellow by the name of Eduardo Montoya?" I about crapped my pants. Tom got worried. "Bro you still there?" I gulped and shakely said, "Yeah that name does ring a bell or two. Fuck. So this grease stain could bring the Montoyas down with what he knows?" "That's the skuttlebutt." Tom replied. Oh my God. That whole syndicate squashed due to a lowly employee giving testimony could mean less headaches for say, John Bishop but would also cut down on heroin import and export in L.A., New York and Paris.

"Okay so they have a lot riding on this and yet still no follow through which leads me to believe that something's hinky." Tom scoffed. "That the professional P.I. Terminology? Hinky? Seriously man welcome to 2017." I slouched in my chair, dropping my feet up on the desk. "Well only us hard boiled detectives know the ins and outs of hinky. Sorry kid, but you need your license before I can devulch such secrets." Tom sounded like he snorted sweet tea through his nose. "Dammit. On my good suit too." I chuckled. "Send me the cleaning bill."

Tom distracted from probably dabbling his tie, "Okay so two marshals warned you off and you are on the QT about it. You promise to throw me an exclusive if this gets hot?" I mulled it over. I can't go blurting out my client's name and have it dragged through the mud but I know Tom. He knows how to keep the facts compartmentalized so why the hell not.

"Yeah but again the names will be changed to protect the innocent." I could almost hear his eye rolled as he spoke, "Dude you really need to update your DVD collection. Well I have a deadline. I will talk later. Watch your ass, man." "I always try but I don't bend that way. Later skater."

Putting the phone down I have to wonder what god I annoyed to drop me into this potential meat grinder again. I swear there is this vindictive writer scrolling my life and doesn't throw enough sex with my violence. Didn't see the Montoya angle and frankly that scared the shit out of me. I am already in enough hot water with these people the last time. Apparently selfies with a lieutenant of a crime outfit as he is getting hauled off is not good business. There have been no bomb shaped parcels at my doorstep and I haven't had a visit from a burly dude with a ballbat fixing to bash my skull and/or kneecaps. Still it is food for thought.

Speaking of food, I think it's time for some. I stop wallowing in my office waiting for the aforementioned ass kissing call. I had a craving for red meat and at this hour only one chain will do. Say whatever you will about the dangers and health risks of fast food. Americans love it like any other vice. Smoking, drinking, unprotected sex, Hell even drugs. We can't get enough of it. I mean it's not as though we are all self-destructive but every so often you have to say the hell with the rules and good intentions, have some greasy food dammit. I have friends that simply don't get my next destination. You have the lovers of the golden arches or the cats that swear and worship the king but for my money and more importantly my palette, I'm hitting Jack-in-the-Box. A couple of cheeseburgers, curly fries and a chocolate milk shake will take me right out of my funk.

No sooner I got back to my office, arms full of my ill-gotten greasy heaven the phone rings. I check caller ID and it's a protected number. Screw it then. I am having lunch. Let messenger service pick it up. The aroma of the burgers are making my mouth water. I plunk down on my chair and start opening a container. And they left off the tomato. Maybe the day is perking up.

A half hour later from my veritable feast of doom I am sipping my milkshake and taking my time through the curly fries. My God, even the seasoning on them are just so. I check my service to find at least three messages. Apparently the call I let go straight to it wasn't the only one. I'm a detective. I notice these little details. All three calls hail from a gentleman slowly getting annoyed calling himself director in charge Special Agent Charles Gruber. I'm picturing him in my head and I keep coming back to the principal from Back to the Future, waiting for him to call me slacker.

Dusting my hands off on one of the far too many napkins, I take down that he is concerned for his agents and wants to have a sit down with me. How nice. Meanwhile couldn't these same people give me a fake ID and shuffle me off to Buffalo? I start scratching my beard I forgot to shave again for the third day. Hey I've been busy. I grab the reciever and stab at the numbers letting a belch out I didn't even know was building up. Thank God no one has answered the phone yet.

On the third ring the same pinched nasal voice that left me my delightful messags answers. "Special Agent Gruber. Is that you Mister Malone?" I stiffled a snicker. "Yes it is, Special Agent Gruber and what can I do for you? Wife sneaking out at odd hours?" You could almost hear his eyes narrowing as he spoke. "I am in no mood for leviety, Mr. Malone. Now then I wish to discuss a very sensitive manner but I would rather not do this over the phone." "Uh-huh. And would the nature of this discussion bare anything on the future of an agent and your very department recieving a rather huge black eye?" Gruber sounded like he swallowed a small bug. "Now hold on young man, there's no need for threats." "First off, I'm not that young. Second, I don't like my person, my job or my clients threatened by anyone, badge or no badge."

Gruber sounded antsy. "Well I understand there was a bit of a situation that was not handled the best and on behalf of the..." I cut in. "Save it. I am in no mood for half-assed apologies or some pandering to my better nature speech. Your agent was out of control so much his own damn partner had to restrain him."

Gruber shoots back with I guess he thought was a commanding authority. "And I understand you pulled a firearm on two federal officers in the line of duty. Have you any idea of the trouble you are in, young man?" Oh enough of this shit. "Again, not a young man. If I were, I would have been piss scared, discharged my firearm and would be in custody trying to explain I was afraid for my life. Furthermore I am sure that Agents Reynolds and Clarke both failed to mention that at no point in time was the gun chambered or even aimed at them. It was dicey and eerie as Hell but we all got through it." I let that sit in the ether for a minute noting that Gruber clearly did not know that little tidbit.

Gruber started burbling and I cut him off again. "I would also point out I have a crisp audio recording of Agent Reynolds' misdeeds and as many digital copies I could copy in 2 hours and you would be amazed how many of those are handed to trusted friends in local law enforcement as well as federal so do try this prick waving contest with me. I'm sure your superiors, Hell your deputy director alone will love how this pans out." "Are you threatening a federal officer, son?" I sighed. "Nope I am just going to hang up and place a call to Washington to the US Marshals Service under WitSec. So I guess we are done here."

Gruber jumped in immediately, "Wait a goddamn minute! How the hell do you know those agents are even connected to Witness Security? Did they publicly announce this to you?" "You really want to quibble over details, Agent Gruber? Fine. No they did not identify themselves as Witness Security nor did they identify themselves as US Marshals so their metaphoric balls are in a sling one way or the other. Now unless you want to hash this out at the big boys table, this conversation is over. Ball's in your court, old man."

Yeah I shouldn't have added that last bit but dammit the young man comments were pissing me off. I felt the need to vent my spleen a little. 30 seconds have gone by and I feel the need to hang up when Gruber finally came back to the line. "Alright, you will have to come in so we can go over this with a fine-tooth comb. Now I can send you a car and.." Again he must think I am slow.

"Yeah, that's not going to happen. I am going nowhere an disgruntled former Marine is going to be. So I tell you what, Gruber. You're more than welcome to toodle on down to my office where I don't have to sit in an interrogation room for undisclosed hours on it getting grilled by people that should be just doing their jobs and not busting my hump." Gruber came back pissed. "Look here. This is not a negotiation, Malone." "Good" I piped back. "Because you have no leverage, anything to offer me or any wiggle room. Your boy screwed up and as his supervisor it is on your head."

I was getting annoyed. I'm tired and I haven't slept well this week and clearly it is making me punchy. Of course it could also be that I am tired of people trying to cover their asses regardless of the noble intentions behind that. "Okay you want to meet. It will be public and no black sedans and SVUs waiting for me. I am in no mood for your cloak and dagger bullshit." "You just said your office!" Gruber shot back. "I did." I said. "Then I came to my senses. You can meet me at Broadway Mall by the Fuddruckers. 4 o' clock. No bullshit or this goes viral."

Gruber gets huffy again. "You don't think I can't have your office and apartment tossed?" I rolled my eyes. "With a warrant of probable cause and it's lunch hour, yeah you could get a judge but it will take some time. I have contacts in the press that can make this print in less than 12 hours. Hell if I feel particularly cranky it goes up on the net, off to folks with anti-government standings. I bet I can find a few bloggers to make it circulate in a matter of minutes. Understand me when I say I won't be happy if I get messed with any further, Gruber. 4 o'clock and don't be late."

I slammed down the phone. See, you don't get that same effect from your smartphone unless you aren't worried about cracking the screen. Did I push him too far? How much is riding on this Montoya case? Could this be the final nail in that prick's coffin, let alone his whole organization? How much dirt could a punk like Baker actually have on Montoya?

I rocked back in my chair mulling it over. It just don't add up. Look, I am a fairly bright guy and I can't piece this together. I'm not saying only I could do that but I should be able to get my head around this.

A knock at my outer office door. I went for the Sig in hand and asked whoever to come in. Through the peep hole I can make out three figures in dapper suits and one Eduardo Montoya.

Yeah this day can officially kiss my ass.

The Case of Financial Woe Chapter 2

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