007 Week: Live and Let Die

Welcome back Bond fans to Day 2 of 007 Week.  As we acknowledge Connery's success as Bond we need to observe the other fellows that claimed this title as well.  Today I thought we would focus on another kind of Bond.  A dapper gentleman with the same strive and need to serve Queen and country.  Referred as a dandy, I would disagree with that term.   While lacking the rough and tumble standing that Connery had, Roger Moore is no lesser Bond and completely worthy of the title.  This is Live and Let Die.

I really have no desire to work for UNCLE.

Mr. Big: Is THIS the spoiling mother who tailed you uptown?
James Bond: There seems to be some mistake. My name is...
Mr. Big: Names is for tombstones, baby! Y'all take this honky out and WASTE HIM! NOW!

While this is the 8th Bond movie, this is the first Moore film as James Bond.  Three MI-6 agents working in junction with the CIA have been killed within 24 hours of their assignment.  The only comment denominator is was Dr. Kananga (Yaphett Kotto of The Thomas Crown Affair, 5 Card Stud, Bone, The Limit, The Running Man and Homicide: Life on the Street) a dictator of the island San Monique making his way to the UN building in New York.   Deep in Harlem a drug kingpin known only as Mr. Big plans to release no less than two tons of heroin through New York as such a cut rate cost to put all other drug czars completely out of business and making him top dog without firing a shot.  

Carribbean Comcast runs things a little differently.

James Bond (Roger Moore of Ivanhoe, The Miracle, Maverick, No Man's Land, The Saint, The Persuaders!, The Man with the Golden Gun, A View to a Kill and Alias) has arrived in New York and his contact with CIA agent Felix Leiter (David Hedison of A Man About a Dog, Crime Club, Adventures of the Queen, The Power Within, Romance Theatre and Fantasy Island) which personally I feel the role has become nothing more than a straight man for Bond's pithy comments or puns.  Remember when Jack Lord handled this role?  Yeah think on that.

Leiter lets Bond in on the scam in question that Kananga and Mr. Big may been in cahoots with one another given San Monique's tropical climate is ideal for poppy growth. Ensuring his empire Kananga seeks solace in his lovely tarot card expert Solitaire (Jane Seymour of The Only Way, The Strauss Family, Our Mutual Friend, Captains and the Kings, Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger, Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman, Smallville and Modern Men) and she gauges the course of his journey as one would the course of the river.  Bond must uncover the heroin connection and put Kananaga's plot on hold.

Now a few facts about the movie.  This is deemed a bit of a groaner for puns as many of Bond's comments are that.  This film fell into the Blaxploitation and broke race barriers for the Bond Franchise as his first romantic encounter with a black woman, CIA agent Rosie Carver (Gloria Hendry of Hell Up in Harlem, Black Caesar, Black Belt Jones, Savage Sisters, Seeds of Tragedy and Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings).  While the previous films focused on meglomaniacs bent on world domination, this movie fixated with drug trafficking  and organized crime.

With a 7 million dollar budget our film cleared $35 million payoff and an Academy Award for Best Original Song "Live and Let Die" by Paul McCarthy and the Wings.  Not too shabby.

Hmm, lovely view.

007 Week: Thunderball

Hello and welcome to the beginning of 007 Week and we clearly cannot start this off without a Connery Bond film.  Sadly, it will not be Dr. No as I already reviewed that for Sean Connery Week if you will recall.  Mind you, there were other things you could have been doing during that week such as: laundry, hemming a skirt or making a quiche.  Nevertheless, we shall have to carry on and move to a popular title to this very day.  From its disturbing content of nuclear arms easily lifted to Bond having to prevent the impending World War III, this film brings us excitement, memorable villains and of course, the fetching ladies of the film.  This is Thunderball.

So... what are you doing after the funeral?

Madame LaPorte: You sound disappointed you did not kill him yourself.
Bond: I am. Jacques Bouvar spoiled two of my colleagues.





As this is the fourth film in the Bond Series starring Sean Connery (An Age of Kings, Macbeth Dr. No, Marnie, Goldfinger, The Anderson Tapes, Meteor, Outland, Highlander and The Hunt for Red October) Bond has returned from avenging several friends from a risque mission when he learns from his superior "M" (Benard Lee of The Angry Silence, Partners in Crime, Whistle Down the Wind, The Brain and Goldfinger) that an organization calling itself SPECTRE (Special Executive for Counter-Intelligence, Terrorism, Revenge and Extortion) has captured two NATO atomic warheads demanding no less than $100 million in diamonds or an undisclosed major city in England or the States will be destroyed.  Hot on the case, Bond follows leads to the Bahamas where he meets Emilio Largo (Adolfo Celi of Pleasant Nights, The Honey Pot, Danger: Diablolik,  Hitler: The Last Ten Days, Ten Little Indians and The Next Man) a eye-patch wearing, card playing gambler that Bond suspects that SPECTRE's man of operations for this caper.

Mr. Peepers reporting as ordered, sir.

Bond's CIA contact Felix Leiter (Rik Van Nutter of Assignment: Outer Space, The Passionate Thief and Romanoff and Juliet) along with Largo's "niece" Domino (Claudine Auger of The Reckless, The Devil in Love, The Killing Game, Anyone Can Play, A Bay of Blood, Equinox and Summertime Killer) both clue Bond into where the warheads are being kept and pointing out the sheer amount of manpower Largo has at his fingertips.  Not for calling in the cavalry, Bond proceeds with his mission at all costs for Queen and country.

Some interesting facts about this film now.  This is the first of the Bond Franchise to have multiple alternative titles due to the translation gap.  These are: Operation: Thunderball, Ian Fleming's Thunderball, Agente 007- Thunderball, James Bond 007- Feuerball, Atomic Ball, Agent 007 Into The Fire, Thunderball Fighting, Operation Thunder, James Bond, Secret Agent, Operation Thunder and Longitude 78 West.

The "Golden Grotto" in the Bahamas does in fact exist and is now to this day been rechristened as "Thunderball Reef".  Sadly, the villa was torn down in 1990 for a hotel resort.   This is the first time we see all the double o's in one room as "M" has called them all to the carpet for a debriefing.  This is also the first of the Bond films to be shot entirely in Panavision (Anamorphic lens for widescreen shooting).  I really wanted to nick the 1965 Thunderbird Largo was driving around in Paris at the start of the film but I seemed to have misplaced my blue police box.

I think a grip left a tack on my chair!

007 Week

Yes, I have seen Jolie in the buff.  Impressive.

Good day and hello to my readers of my tripe.  I appreciate each and everyone of you for comments, complaints and overall suggestions.  That being said I am bringing us a few cinematic collections based on one suave, sophisticated and lethal fellow in service of the Queen.  Based on internationally known novelist Ian Fleming we will be checking out a man in more states of undress than Courtney Love "sober".   I speak of none other than James Bond.   This week we will be going over the various incarnations of this iconic character with the minor exception I will NOT sit through On Her Majesty's Secret Service.  I would rather have my eye lids taped back with needles threatening to gouge them if I blink or look away from one of Andy Dick's sexual soirees.

Lazenby?  Don't make me laugh.

The basis of the character was created as a Royal Naval Reserve Commander during World War II, where he went on to being an intelligence analyst and finally an field agent for the fictitious MI-6 receiving his double o status of license to kill.  A blunt instrument with a certain sophistication, charm and grace and remain out of the spotlight...  and yet they kept casting faces and builds that we recognized.  Go figure.  Officially 7 men have portrayed this character, Sean Connery against Ian Fleming's wishes being the first.  Bring a sense of humor and a mildly repressed Scottish accent, Dr. No managed to gross more than $16 million from the US in 1962 on a $1.1 million dollar budget.  Not too shabby, eh?    So grab a dame, a vodka martini, shaken not stirred and keep the Walther PPK at the ready.

Not upset, just holding in a sneeze.

Schwarzenegger Week: Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Greetings action and sci-fi junkies and welcome to Day 5 of Schwarzenegger Week and time to cover one of the most beloved of the Schwarzenegger franchise. Where one incarnation of the same character was a ruthless and relentless killing machine determined to complete the mission it was sent for, this version is a steadfast, capable and implacable protector.  in the summer of 1991 we saw computer generated effects, chase scenes and gun battles that completely changed the course of storytelling and cinema.  This is Terminator 2: Judgement Day.

My hair looks good?  

The Terminator: Come with me if you want to spoil.






10 years after the first encounter of this cyborg organism, Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton of Secrets of Midland Heights, King's Crossing, Tag: The Assassination Game, The Terminator, Beauty and the Beast, Silent Fall and Chuck) has been enlisted in paramilitary organizations, guerilla freedom fighters and mercenaries to teach her son, the future leader of humanity to outfight and out think Skynet and all its killer machines.  Upon blowing up a factory she was arrested and sent to a psychiatric ward.  Her son John Connor (Edward Furlong of Pet Sematary II, American Heart, A Home of Our Own, Before and After, Pecker and American History X) has been assigned to yet another foster care where he spends most of his time hitting arcades and ripping off money from ATMs to further his mallrat lifestyle.   Rather than send another machine to deal with Sarah Connor in that fixed point in time, Skynet sends a new type of Terminator called the T-1000 (Robert Patrick of Body Shot, Zero Tolerance, Double Dragon, Decoy, The Faculty, The X-Files, Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, The Unit and From Dusk Till Dawn TV series) an entity compressed of a liquid metal with the ability to take on other forms of equal mass and fashion its limbs into stabbing weapons, it takes the form of a police officer and mimics human emotions.

The resistance knowing Skynet's intent also sends a warrior back to assist John.  The very make and model T-800 infiltrator model that was sent to dispatch Sarah Connor 10 years ago.  The Terminator (Arnold Schwarzenegger of...  seriously?  Have you not been reading this week??  IMDB him then.)  protects and obeys John Connor in the best of its programming allows it.   Joined again by Sarah, John and the Terminator must find a way to defeat the T-1000, stop Skynet from ever being created and avert the impeding apocalypse before it is too late.

Catherine telling the Beast the relationship is over...

Just a few bits of trivia and fun facts about the movie.  This film was given a $100 million dollar budget in 1991 for Director/writer James Cameron (The Terminator, Aliens, The Abyss, True Lies, Titanic and Avatar) to complete and raking in a little over 200 million at the box office, not including VHS rental, sales, special releases and the latter DVD and Blu-Ray to come.

With its level of explosions, vehicles and buildings going up like Roman candles, coupled with stuntman driving, wirework and gun battles the visual creation on just the human involvement was stellar.  Add small scale model work, blue screen effects and CGI in its infant state brought the story together.

To this date, this film is the only sequel to win an Academy Award when the original film was not even nominated.   With F/X legend Stan Winston and crew they simulated from hours of nuclear test foots to create the nightmare sequence as possible to even have several nuclear test labs declaring (unofficially of course) the most accurate portrayal of a nuclear blast created in a motion picture.   Industrial Light and Magic's cutting edge computer graphics department went from 6 artists to 36 for the T-1000 costing a little over $5 million and 8 months prep and production for about 3 and a half minutes of screen time.  Yikes, the dailies most have driven the producers nuts.

This was an immensely fun week and at the suggestion of my dad two weeks prior.  Thanks Dad, I had a blast with this one.

Hmm, may need a bit of buffing out and chassis work.

Schwarzenegger Week: Red Heat

Welcome to Day 4 of Schwarzenegger Week and it is clearly time for even more shots of Arnold's butt.  No, straight men you will have to accept this tradition that has been since The Terminator and move on.   This time around Arnold will attempt an accent that is not his own but learn some Russian and pummel even more bad guys in various state of dress.  Coupled with Jim Belushi he will thwart crime and take down the head villain.  This is Red Heat.

Keep it at 50 or we blow up!

Art Ridzik:  I'm gonna get us something from the four food spoilers: hamburgers, french fries, coffee and doughnuts.





Writer/director of action Walter Hill (The Warriors, 48 Hrs., Crossroads, Extreme Prejudice, Johnny Handsome, Another 48 Hrs. and Last Man Standing)  give us a slew of buddy cop cliches, hard hitting one-liners and many composure of James Horner (Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, Krull, Star Trek III: The Search for Spock, Commando, Cocoon, Willow and Glory) brings a gritty and dark look the differences of countries, police work and views on life.    A Georgian drug lord Viktor Rostavili (Ed O' Ross of Lethal Weapon, Full Metal Jacket, Action Jackson, Another 48 Hrs., Universal Soldier, Dark Planet and Sorority Party Massacre) is being led into a trap via Captain Ivan Danko (Arnold Schwarzenegger of Raw Deal, Twins, Kindergarten Cop, Dave, True Lies, T2 3-D: Battle Across Time and Batman & Robin) only to have to tables turn as Rosta's men gun down more than a few of the Soviet cops including Danko's partner.  Yes, now he made it personal and so on.

Well it's August.  Of course I am sweaty.

 Rosta makes his way to the States and lands in Chicago to peddle his wares when CPD gets wind of it and nabs him up.  Assigned to a plethora of murders with Rosta's m.o. Detective Art Ridzik (James Belushi of Salvador, The Principal, Real Men, K-9, Taking Care of Business, Last Action Hero and According to Jim) is there to represent Chicago PD as a prisoner transfer to Danko is to take place when Rosta's men strike again and now Ridzik looses his partner.  Double jeopardy babies!!  The two completely different cops team up in good faith and pursue Rosta and his lackeys up and down over half of Chicago causing more than their fair share of destruction to public and private property and have several shoot-outs in the process.

A few notes on the film itself if you will.

 This Hodge podge collection of action and pithy comments has more than the usual cadre of stars in it including: Gina Gershon, Laurence Fishburne, Peter Boyle and Arnold's weightlifting and sparring buddy Sven-Ole Thorsen.    I swear that guy has been in every Arnold flick to the day.  So the concept of the film is not exactly original.  Two cops from different sides of the track (or countries) are forced to team, argue, snipe, bitch, work together and become buddies by the end of the film.

Okay the formula has been used numerous times by even our director but it works.  We have action, some comedic moments and Arnold looks like a stone face golem, hell bent on crushing his chosen opponent and Belushi is really along for the ride.  I do not discount the humor and attitude he brings to the picture but it is hard to look like a bad ass next to Schwarzenegger...  unless you are Stallone.

Ivan Danko: Pro Vodka.

Schwarzenegger Week: The Running Man

Day 3 of Schwarzenegger Week is here!  Are you folks tired of over-the-top acting and ridiculous violence??!!  No?  Well then it is time we look to the future of law enforcement, crime and punishment.  With overpopulation, a lack of jobs and healthcare how do we give the people what they want?  How about an old Roman classic with a gladiatorial fight to the death?  This is The Running Man.

Survey says, " LET'S PLAY THE RUNNING MAN!"

Ben Richards: I told Killian I would be back.  I don't want to be a spoiler.








The year is 2017 and the global economy has completely collapsed leaving countries to fend for themselves as America as you knew it is now a police state censoring all forms of media and activity.  To keep the populace pacified a series of TV shows are at the ready to remove convicts from our gene pool in daily game shows.   The most popular is The Running Man hosted by Damon Killian (Richard Dawson of The Devil's Brigade, Hogan's Heroes, Love, American Style, Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In and Hong Kong Phooey) and boy has he handed a whopper of a contestant.  Former police pilot Ben Richards (Arnold Schwarzenegger of  The Streets of San Francisco, Scavenger Hunt, Conan the Destroyer, Commando, Predator and Total Recall) flew overhead of a food riot in Bakersfield, his superior instructs him to mow them down and he refuses. His own men jump and bind him while cutting civilians down.

Yeesh, Sub-Zero really let himself go.

Framed for their deaths and stuck in a labor camp he makes a jail break with his inmate friends tough guy Laughlin (Yaphet Kotto of Live and Let Die, Roots, Alien, Othello, For Love and Honor and Homicide: Life on the Street) and tech geek Weiss (Marvin J. McIntyre of Short Circuit, Project X, The Presido, Twins and Back to the Future Part III).  The three part ways when Richards says he just wants to live the quiet life and hang out with his brother.  He discovers his brother's apartment has been re-leased to another tenant Amber Mendez (Maria Conchita Alonso of Moscow on the Hudson, Fear City, Blood Ties, Colors, Vampire's Kiss, Predator 2 and Roosters) and she knows him to be a mad dog killer of women and children. Amber alerts (tee hee) the police and security to capture Richards and Killian gets our boy for the show.  Will Richards race to the finish or will he just be dead meat on the side of the road?

Some fun trivia about the film at this time.  The novel, The Running Man written by novelist Stephen King of which the movie is very loosely based on was written in about 72 hours.  

Arnold's campaign bus was titled running man for Governor.  Supporting character of the Resistance consisted of Mick Fleetwood of Fleetwood Mac and Rocker Frank Zappa's son Dweezil both wanting to check out Arnold and be in an action flick.

It is said that the inspiration for American Gladiators came from this movie and not a history book.  Hell at least they didn't channel either concept's lethal obstacles.  

Need a painful pun?

Schwarzenegger Week: Predator

Howdy folks and welcome back to Schwarzenegger Week as we view an action/sci-fi hybrid taking the best of both genres and directed by veteran action guru (John McTiernan of Nomads, Die Hard, The Hunt for Red October, Die Hard: With a Vengeance, The 13th Warrior, The Thomas Crown Affair remake and Rollerball remake) who brings his experience and expertise to the table.  This is Predator.

Told you it wasn't a gopher!

Poncho: You're bleeding, man.
Blain: I ain't got time to bleed.
Poncho: Oh... Okay...
Poncho: You got time to spoil?



An elite special ops team lead by Major Dutch (Arnold Schwarzenegger of The Jayne Mansfield Story, Conan the Barbarian, The Terminator, Commando, Twins, True Lies, Eraser and End of Days) assigned by a Major General character actor/mentor/path provider with a joint CIA mission to get a presidential cabinet member free from guerrilla forces.

Dutch's team consist of Sgt Mac Elliot (Bill Duke of American Gigolo, Palmerstown, U.S.A., Commando, No Man's Land, Action Jackson, Bird on a Wire, Payback, The Limey and Exit Wounds) Blain Cooper (Governor Jesse Ventura of WrestleMania III, The Running Man, Thunderground, Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe, Ricochet and Major League II) Billy Sole (Sonny Landham of Blood Bath, The Warriors, 48 Hrs., Firewalker, Action Jackson, Maximum Force and Lock Up) Poncho (Richard Chaves of Witness, Ohara, War of the Worlds, Night Eyes II, Night Realm and Dark House)  and Hawkins (writer/actor Shane Black of Night of the Creeps, Dead Heat, Robocop 3, Night Realm, As Good as It Gets, Monkeys and Any Day).  Working with CIA contact in Central America is Dutch's old buddy Dillon (Carl Weathers of Rocky,  Close Encounters of the Third Kind, Force 10 From Navarone, Rocky II, Rocky III, Action Jackson, Tour of Duty and In the Heat of the Night) who is in charge of the mission.

It's got Betty Davis Eyes!

No sooner does the crew hoof it through the jungle they find a downed helicopter with the skinned remains of an Army Special Forces team lead by Dutch's friend Hopper.  Dillon clams up on it and claims they should have never been out here.  They hit a rebel encampment hard, smoking these poor schmucks like a pack of Marlboros spraying the  camp with enough lead to block Superman's peepers.

Dutch finally confronts Dillon over the inconsistencies to his story and Dillon tells them their were CIA Agents nabbed by guerrillas.  the spec ops team went in to find and rescue and well we know how well that went.  

Back on the move, the team can almost feel eyes on them.  Hawkins is watching the prisoner the team picked up when something appears out of the jungle and runs Hawkins through leaving the female prisoner unharmed.   What else is out there?  Is it another guerrilla they missed or has another chess piece been added to the board?

A few comments and trivia about the film now.  Jean-Claude Van Damme was originally cast to play the Predator but was dropped by McTierran due to his relentless complaining.  Such the diva our Van Damme.  After Dutch skewers a bad guy against the post with his machete, Arnold drops his one-liner "Stick around" purely by improv.

 Between rough terrain, humidity, snakes, leeches and freezing cold night shoots, the actors almost threw in the towel.  Schwarzenegger especially with the cold mud smeared over his face, arms and torso.  Schnapps kept him warmer but also got him a wee bit hammered.  Who says you can't drink on the job?

Be vewy, vewy quiet.