The Return of Swamp Thing

 Welcome back Readers of Rotten. I am trying to get more blogs out this summer, while looking for more writing work. Any freelance writing suggestions, feel free to toss them my way. Today I wanted to continue a tragic hero of the DC Comics universe. Now I know that is extremely vague and doesn't help anyone but I am getting to the character. For a couple of actors, they will be reprising roles in the continuation of the harrowing adventures of Doctor Alec Holland. This is The Return of Swamp Thing.

 

Ayyyy....

 

 

 

 

 

With the recurrence of this noteworthy and dark storyline based character, Doctor Holland a.k.a. The plant/man hybrid known as Swamp Thing (Dick Durock of Stand By Me, Swamp Thing, Runaway Train, Return of Swamp Thing, Delirious, Swamp Thing TV series, Die Hard with a Vengeance and The Hunted) has a life filled with agony and loss.   Wes Craven's original run gave us his humble beginnings as a passionate scientist, whose only concern was to aid his fellow humanity with his restoration formula that would magnify both plant and animal.   This time however, we get a more tongue in cheek story with Jim Wynorski (The Lost Empire, Chopping Mall, Sorceress, Hard Bounty, Demolition High, Against the Law, Raptor, Busty Cops and The Curse of the Komodo) at the director's helm. 

 

First, kippers and then take over the world!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 With our film opening with bubbly Abigail Arcane (Heather Locklear of City Killer, T.J. Hooker, Dynasty, Melrose Place, Double Tap, Spin City, Scrubs and Looney Tunes: Back in Action) who is bustling about finishing her packing and heading out to attend her mother's funeral.  A somber event no doubt.   With that she visits her stepfather Dr. Anton Arcane (Louis Jourdan of Letter from an Unknown Woman, Gigi, The Swan, Escapade, The V.I.P.s, The Young Rebel, Swamp Thing, Octopussy and Counterforce), who Abby hasn't really seen since she was a little girl.   The "good" doctor has always been consumed by his work. After a near death experience, Arcane wishes to make amends to Abby and assure her she is the most important thing in her life. Abby strikes me as a tad naive.  How can I say such?   Well her dad has a private mercenary army at his fingertips. Seriously this cat has more protection than Dr. Quest. 

 

Bill Shatner, you go too far!

 

 

 

 

 

Of his gunsels...hmm thugs? Mercs? Oh I got it! Lickspittles! Head of security Lickspittle! Mr. Gunn (Joey Sagal of World War III, Final Jeopardy, Quiet Cool, The Hidden, Out for Blood, Bloodfist VII: Manhunt, Barb Wire, Whatever It Takes, Lost Treasure and Retrograde) and Ms. Poinsettia (the lovely Monique Gabrielle of Deathstalker II, Bachelor Party, Emmanuelle 5, Amazon Women on the Moon, The Big Bet, Not of This Earth, Hard to Die, Body Chemistry II: The Voice of a Stranger, 976-Evil II, Evil Toons and Angel Eyes) have enough sexual tension between them, pretty sure the rest of the guards are chuckling and commenting quietly, "Just screw already." Now I am certain some of you are confused.  To recap, Dr. Acane had Swamp Thing flogged, netted and then chained up.   He attempted to duplicate Holland's formula, had a goof and morphed into a chitinous mutant pig monster that Swampy dispatched.   Soooo...what in the cheese and crackers is a-going on?

 

THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

With the assistance of Dr. Zurrell (The stunning Sarah Douglas of The People That Time Forgot, Superman, Thundercloud, Superman II, Conan the Destroyer, Falcon Crest, Beastermaster 2 Through the Portal of Time, Return of the Living Dead III, The Demolitionist, Stargate SG-1 and Heavy Gear: The Animated Series) whom Arcane has been seeing and Dr. Rochelle (Ace Mask of Big Bad Mama II, Not of This Earth, The Return of Swamp Thing, Transylvania Twist, 976-Evil II, Munchie, Sins of Desire, Ghoulies IV, Victim of Desire,Babylon 5 and Buffy the Vampire Slayer) have been working on these various mutations trying to re-create the formula and flooding the swamps with mutants. They tampered in God's domain and Gunn's men haven't really busted their collective butts to capture them all.   C'mon, Doc. Ya gotta pay the overtime.

Let's not forget those darn, pesky kids Darryl (Daniel Emery Taylor of The Return of Swamp Thing, Road Trip, Hell-ephone, Hell House, The Legacy, Resurrection, Night of the Cannibals, Mountain Mafia, Camp Massacre and For a Few Zombies More) and Omar (RonReaco Lee of The Return of Swamp Thing, Career Opportunities, Paris Trout, How I Spent My Summer Vacation, Sister,Sister, Girlfriends, Committed and The Shield) whose parents clearly are not watching them AT ALL. Yes they are a bit of comic relief, kid hi-jinks and an element of the big green's humanity. At 6'6", I think we can call him a jolly green giant.

 

Swampy spends a little time with these two, saves them from a few mutants and even poses with them for a few pics. Pre-Selfie! What we have here is a superhero story of Swamp Thing falling for Abby and vice versa. Arcane is being a typical mad scientist and control freak and some good fight sequences and explosions. Hell we even get Swamp Thing getting behind the wheel of a jeep. Not to mention CCR (Creedence Clearwater Revival for you younger readers) Born on the Bayou as opening credits intro. Flawless victory!!

Is it a bit goofy? Yes. Does that bother me? Hell no. We got mutates, Swamp Thing getting to smack creatures and mercs around like tennis balls and maybe even get a girl. Anything's possible. For me I saw this when I rented it from Blockbuster in the day. We got it and had no expectations, only to be pleasantly surprised. I loved it and have it in the collection. So yes, old school superhero fans grab a copy, you'll thank me. 

 

Hehe, I'm high on...me.

 

 

Superhero Film Week: Swamp Thing

Welcome back boys and girls to another helping of Superhero Film Week.  I thought I would point out the differences to the MPAA (Motion Picture Association of America) ratings from the early 80’s to current.  The Christian Morality campaign was in high swing and felt films needed to be rated by the government to cut down on violence and nudity since Hollywood wasn’t doing their jobs according to these yahoos.   With stricter clauses inserted the ratings for the next film I am reviewing would be rated R rather than the PG rating it was given in the day.  Why would that be on a comic book film you ask?  Well DC Comics had more mature collections as well including this very character I am going to babble on and on about.   So grab those hip waders, watch for alligators and do not bring your evil here.   This is Swamp Thing.

No hitchhikers!!!

Dr. Anton Arcane: A man who loves gives hostages to spoiler.

Based on the DC Comics horror series, House of Secrets; a tragic tale of a scientist striving only to better the world and humanity was met with a near fatal end.  A new metamorphosis on life if you will and this translated to a later series known as Swamp Thing.  Director Wes Craven (The Last House on the Left, The Hills Have Eyes, A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Serpent and the Rainbow, Night Visions and Scream) embraced the terror and conflict side of this comic book and brought it to life.

Must not stare at cleavage...maybe a glance.

Government agent Alice Cable (Adrienne Barbeau of Escape from New York, The Fog, Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death, Batman the Animated Series, The Drew Carey Show and God of War III) has been assigned to protect a pair of scientists Dr Alec Holland (Ray Wise of Robocop, Knots Landing, Twin Peaks, The Chase, Ressurection Blvd., and Reaper) and Linda Holland (Nannette Brown of Swamp Thing and My Boyfriend’s Back) because of the practicalities and applications of Holland’s formula.  A formula that allows both plant and animal to survive and adapt even thrive in the harshest of conditions.  

Scalp massage?

Of course with every good intention something wicked lurks behind it as a rival scientist Anton Arcane (Louis Jordan of Letter from an Unknown Woman, Gigi, Made in Paris, To Commit a Murder and Year of the Comet) and his army of mercenaries, shoot just about everyone involved, torch the place like a Vietnamese village and make off with Holland’s notebooks.  Alec falls into the swamps coated in his formula and on fire.  

Cable escapes and invades the mercs while trying to call for help and she sees a 6 foot 5 plant creature emerge from the swamps and swat Arcane’s bully boys around like they were house flies.  As she heads for cover the creature acknowledges her name and makes known that he is Holland. This now towering plant humanoid seeks revenge on Arcane.

Now I have just a few comments about the movie.  It does have the 1950’s atomic mutation feel of a monster film yes but the source material gave that option.  The classic struggle of good vs. evil and for all its flaws Louis Jordan was an exquisite villain and his right hand man Ferret (David Hess of The Last House on the Left, Hitch Hike, House on the Edge of the Park, Nutcracker, Zombie Nation and Cabin Fever) is the personification of scumbag.  He just comes off as this leering rapist/murderer that probably savaged many a village during that lovely war. 

Made ya a convertible there, chief!

Poor Swamp Thing (Dick Durock of Coast to Coast, Braker, Silverado and Swamp Thing the TV Series) had to be melting in his mostly thick rubber suit trudging through the swamps and not falling on his face was a real compliment to his balance.  And no we shant speak of the unfortunate sequel by Jim Wynorski.  One last tidbit is Friday the 13th famed composer Harry Manfredini did the composure for this film as he was a regular working with Wes Craven projects.