Hey folks back some more. Well after
the illuminating film, Beaster Day I decided I wanted some more
superhero viewing. Avengers: Endgame is up and running but yeah
gonna be hard to take screenshots of that. So why not hit an
animated film with at least two Avengers and maybe a runty X-Man too?
With droves of devastation, mass smack downs and more that a few
furious roars, today's film is coming at you. This is Hulk Vs.
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| Hulk say you not Idris Elba!! |
What is a two-part story line of Hulk's
many forays out and about from his gargantuan leaps, Hulk makes his
way into Asgard. All Father Odin, King of Asgard, the light of the
Nine Realms and the life's blood of Asgard must sleep for the winter
in order to replenish the realm and bring forth a bountiful harvest
and give power back to the lands. Well into the Odinsleep, the realm
is less protected and gets lumped onto Odinson, Thor (Matthew
Wolf of Family Affairs, Shelf Life, Fable, Samurai Warriors 2, I
Shouldn't Be Alive, Call of Duty 3, BladeStorm: Hundred Years War,
Rambo and Big Red), his friends the Warriors Three and Lady
Sif (Grey Griffin of Star Wars: Jedi Knight- Jedi Academy,
Looney Tunes: Reality Check, The Powerpuff Girls, Doom 3, Johnny
Bravo, Ultimate Avengers, Xiaolin Showdown, X-Men: The Official Game
and Batman: Arkham City) to keep things in check.
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| Isn't that Hulk pimp slapping Not Idris Elba around? |
As any good Thor fan is aware of. Dear
adopted brother Loki is plotting and scheming as per usual, so enter
the Hulk who will no doubt be duped or mind controlled into doing
Loki's bidding.
The green goliath is voiced by Fred
Tatasciore (Avengers Assemble, Batman Ninja, Guardians of
the Galaxy, Lego DC Super Hero Girls: Super-Villain High, The Loud
House, Lost in Oz, DC Super Hero Girls: Legends of Atlantis, Marvel
Powers United VR and DuckTales) and brother the Golden Realm
is in for a serious real estate overhaul when Hulk is in full-on
"Smash mode".
As predicted, Loki takes over Hulk and
proceeds to go sick house on Asgard when Thor and Mjornir crack open a
36 pack of whoop ass and then...PLACE YOUR BETS!!! Prince of Asgard
vs the Jade Giant! Fear not for the realm but pity the masons that
have to do this massive repair job. I wouldn't wish that gig on
anyone. Hey, does the All Father approve of O.T.? Things like that
keep me up at night, huh? So what do you get? 12 solid minutes of a
brutal match between Loki controlled Hulk and Thor.
Of course, dullard that Loki is, he's
fueling Hulk's rage. Y'know, like dropping wood into a forest fire
and then following it up with napalm. For those not getting this
analogy, that's bad. Important safety tip there. Don't do any of
that. Well the local landscape, architecture and maybe a random
sheep are getting squashed, smashed and crushed. Even better news,
no Loki or Banner to reign Hulk in...there's no end to his rage. So
yeah that's gonna go well.
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| Permit me to take you to "Funkytown", mortal. |
The day is done and Banner has given
more than any of us will ever know. Primarily because we are not
selfless fictional characters. Onto a realm filled with darkness,
primitives and maple syrup. I speak none other than the feared
region known as...Canada!!! A virtual Savage Land and... okay all
kidding aside, why does most of America have issues with Canada?
I'm clueless on this one.
Now we check in with one of my favorite
antiheroes voiced by the talented Steve Blum (Wolverine
and the X-Men, Superhero Squad, Cowboy Bebop, Cowboy Bebop: The
Movie, Star Wars Rebels, Transformers: Robots in Disguise,
Transformers: Rescue Bots and Let It Die), at 5'5", 300
lbs of Adamantium and all attitude, Wolverine. Yup, need a deep
growly voice for this guy and brother Blum delivers. Well bub,
he's the best there is at what he does. Too bad none of that is
diplomacy or a deft hand at dealing with a raging beast that can
clear most forest fires with a clap of his massive hands.
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| When Atomic Wedgies go horribly wrong! |
Naturally we need a hero vs hero fight
so off we go! Yup, this forest area is completely boned.
I mean just the large thump from 300
foot Hulk drop into the Earth, thunderclaps rocketing trees willy
nilly and oh yeah smacking a midget with claws through trees,
boulders and skipping him like a stone in the lakes. Wolvie has been
dispatched by Department H (it is unclear if he is still under
Canadian Spec Ops still or not, definitely not Alpha Flight)
as a town has been completely destroyed, innocents lost their lives
and Hulk's scent is all over the place.
What will have here is two guys with
buckets of stamina, rage issues and the need to put the hurt on the
other. Seriously I don't think Logan has ever gotten along with
Banner's alter ego ever.
Low and behold; an off the books Weapon
X project is underway and gee, isn't that Sabertooth, the cyborg
assassin Lady Deathstrike, the Soviet super-soldier Omega Red and the
Merc with the Mouth Deadpool? Well these peepers rarely fail me, so
yes it is.
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| Wolvie Revenge Force Activate! |
Wel,l the professor that originally gave
Logan bones and claws laced with adamantium wants Hulk and Wolverine
for a new Weapon X project as soldiers. Yeah multiple PhD s and this
doesn't sound stupid. Shockingly enough, Wolvie's sparring partners
want him dead, gouge the prof and prepare to unleash a series of
fatal ass whippings on Wolvie but he gets loose and gets to Banner.
Oopsie Poopsie, Hulk very angry. Must have knocked Sabertooth about
at least a mile. Deadpool bounced like a tennis ball, all the while
Omega and Deathstrike are still trying to mix it up with Wolvie.
Not going to lie to you, not a huge fan
of the artwork but both stories and voice cast easily make up for
that. We have two substantial fights of epic proportion. And yes I
loved Nolan North as Deadpool. He was killing me. Pew pew pew!! So
at the end of this madness, I had two colossal, drag out battles
worthy of wine and song. Thanks Marvel.
FYI, first cartoon flick we get to see
Wolvie take the villains to claw town. Yup bunch of soldiers dressed
like Hunks from Resident Evil get the sharp end of those blades and
dammit, we need that now and again.
