Captain Marvel

Howdy all. Well time for a new release. Yes I know so many of you wanted an obscure Italy Horror or an Exploitation film from the 1950s but dammit I need some new viewing material from time to time. With this new Marvel "Cough Disney subservient" release, the controversy (that really isn't) we finally have a female protagonist not surrounded by male counterparts in the sense they have to protect or govern her.   As Phase 3 is commencing and it's all about outer space, it is time.  This is Captain Marvel.

C'mon, put 'em up! Put 'em up!

Our story is in a far away time...the dreaded 1990s.  That savage time period.   Cellphones could barely flip, we had actual face-to-face conversations and our music wasn't completely sucky.   Enter a young Kree (Alien species with blue blood that can resurrect humans) recruit Vers (Bria Larson of Free Fire, Room, Kong: Skull Island, The Glass Castle, Unicorn Store, Basmati Blues and Captain Marvel) is having confusing dreams/nightmares. A link to the past? Another life before the Kree? Who can say?

She and her trainer/mentor Yon-Rogg (Jude Law of Gattaca, Final Cut, A.I. Artificial Intelligence, Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, Alfie and Repo Men) tells her in true Obi-Wan fashion to be mindful of her feelings, powers and surroundings. To serve the Empire with diligence, dignity and grace.  She's a bit headstrong, cocky and some levels, arrogance. I like that. Reminds me of me. No wait, that's another film. She and her team are on mission to stop Skrulls (race of shapeshifting and transmographing alien combantants) for disrupting the harmony of an outside system under Kree protection.  Vers is captured and probed (mind not anus. You perverts) as the gaps in her memory show her a parallel life on an insignificant blue and green planet involving primitive vehicles like go-karts, 64 and a half Mustangs, Hornet fighter jets and hey... ain't that Earth? How kooky.

The domesticated Skrull attends to light housekeeping and dusting.

As Vers is done with hanging upside down, she proceeds to open a big gulp worth of whoop ass on the Skrulls, escapes the vessel in a pod and crash land in a refuge of movie known as Blockbuster Video.  Hope I didn't lose the Milennials again. Prior to Red Box, there was a store that provided you VHS and DVDs, snacks and soda, along with human interaction on selecting films of current or previous eras. Thanks to progress...we have none of those. Hurrah.

With being an extraterrestrial, she is flanked by a couple of SHIELD agents, Fury (Samuel L Jackson of Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown, Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace, Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Captain America: The First Avenger, The Avengers, Black Snake Moan, The Incredibles and Afro Samurai) without his mother f bombs (so sad) and Phil Coulson (Clark Gregg of Spartan, The West Wing, When a Stranger Calls, The Air I Breathe, Iron Man, Iron Man 2, Thor, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., The Avengers, Ultimate Spider-Man and Captain Marvel). Assigned by their higher ups to keep tabs on Vers, understand and plan for the Skrulls and see if she is on our side.

Jackson senses MF Bombs but is forbidden to utter them.

With Vers' team lead by Yon-Rogg, I can't help but recognize a few later villainous fellows such as Korath (Djmon Housou of Stargate, ER, The Four Feathers, Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life, Constantine, The Island, Blood Diamond and Guardians of the Galaxy) and Ronan the Accuser (Lee Pace of Pushing Daisies, A Single Man, When in Rome, The Resident, 30 Beats, Lincoln, The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey, The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug and Guardians of the Galaxy) so yeah a tad flashback like. Not unlike this whole film granted.

Piecing together her life on Earth and in the Kree homeworld, Hala Vers is having conflicting memories about a FTL drive (Faster than Light) and who it would benefit.

Can Vers agree to work with SHIELD? Can the Skrulls be defeated? Can the Kree be trusted?

So yeah Marvel, nice of you to get off your ass and finally have a predominant female protagonist film. Not as though Marvel archives are rife with them and...oh wait, THERE ARE TONS of them!! Let's address the chauvinistic pricks that whined about this movie. Fellas, what's the damn problem? She came, she saw and she kicked ass.   Had Spidey levels of quips, energy channeling and re-directional blasts, flight, strength. She's Captain Marvel. So what's the friggin' problem? Did you not "See Yourselves?" Boo frickin' hoo. How many muscle bound male hero flicks out there? You can find more than a few.

This is Black Panther whiny white guy bitching all over again. Frankly, I wanted to see Valkyrie, She-Hulk, Spider-Woman, Elsa Bloodstone and Misty Knight 20 YEARS AGO, but I cannot bitch and complain about that all the time. I would be tedious and annoying. Much like the pricks that complained about this film. Solid storyline, a few alterations to meet the current timeline, great cameos and nods to the current nifty gags and tropes, this is a decent flick.

Oh and guys that ask me this FAR TOO OFTEN, no there is no titty in the movie. 

Miles away, Hollywood Video had Hercules drunk again.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Hey there readers, I'm back. Sorry for the delay, I was busy creating my Johnny Mnemonic review for my Rotten Reelz Reviews Video Review (Now available on YouTube!) so yeah I was a bit distracted. Yes I am aware of the high grossing MCU Avengers: Infinity War and no I have not seen it yet. Please, no spoilers.

Instead I thought we could enjoy the dethawed 6'2" blond, bohunk of the 1940s after his Avengers debut. This time around he is working with S.H.I.E.L.D dealing with conspiracies, collateral damage and a ton of action. This is Captain America: Winter Soldier.

Captain...going down?  wink wink.

Captain America (Chris Evans of The Losers, Not Another Teen Movie and Fantastic Four) is adapting to modern life, goes for a lengthy run of 20 miles. That would warm up the limbs. He bumps into a vet Sam Wilson (Anthony Mackie of Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter, Avengers: Age of Ultron and Ant-Man) and they bond over being in combat and adjusting to civilian life.

Scooped up for an search and rescue team for a ship in international waters alongside his fellow Avenger, the Black Widow (Scarlett Johansen of Lost in Translation, Iron Man II, The Avengers and Ghost in the Shell) as they assess the situation and drop the terrorists.

Fighting skills by Hydra. Fabulous hair by Vidal Sassoon.

After being a bit pissed at Widow working a different mission on his, Cap grumbles at Director Nick Fury (Samuel Jackson of Pulp Fiction, Rules of Engagement, Iron Man II, The Avengers and The Spirit) about protocol, soldiers needing to have each others back and so on. Head guru spymaster lets Cap in on the new upgraded helicarriers, loaded with rail guns and missile racks, speaking of how wiping out potential threats instead of playing clean up. Both argue their different ideals of how America should respond to threats and Cap is adamant how wrong this rejoinder and stomps off like a diva.

Fury starts investigating how this mass SNAFU to find out who is behind it and is later chased by armed assailants dressed like SWAT. Big question during this firefight...where are the actual cops? Anyone? Fury's poor SHIELD SVU has been blasted something fierce and just when all looks fine, a single armed man blasts his ride, flipping it up and over.

Cap returns home to find a battered Fury hiding out in his apartment and he casually talks to him while passes Cap notes explaining SHIELD isn't the secure, agreeable peace keeping force we are lead to believe when Fury takes a few rounds from a sniper.

Cap's neighbor watches over Fury while Cap gives chase, hurls his mighty shieeeeeeld...and low and behold, our sniper is the same guy that shot at Fury prior, catching Cap's shield in his nifty bionic arm. He hurls it back at Cap and leaps from a rooftop like it's nothing.

Cap and Widow regretting the three bean burritos now.

Head of Council, Alexander Pierce (Robert Redford of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, The Sting, Three Days of the Condor, Legal Eagles and Captain America: Winter Soldier) wants answers. Cap keeps it close to the vest and heads out. His team decides to jump him and we have a decent smack down and chase.

Widow works with Cap to figure out who took out Fury, what the hell is going on and what seems to be a building to a mass conspiracy to take over the world?!

Not to use existing titles too often but this is The Manchurian Candidate, Three Days of the Condor and good old over-the-top comic book action.

With collusion, cloak and dagger motifs, gun play and plenty of suspense; we have a decent machination story line offering plenty of story, intrigue and managing to keep a riveting fantasy trying to remain grounded in reality.

An awesome cast giving a great performance, excellent SFX and a sequel that surpassed its original.

I highly recommend this film for action fans and comic book fans alike.

Not sure how to say it Ludlow, but you look like a weasel.