Tuesday, August 27, 2019

Eternal Code


What's the old cliche? A new spin on an old thing? Hey folks, I'm back with a request review from our old friend, producer Joe Williamson of Williamson Management Company (Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance, Check Point, Holy Terror, Nation's Fire, Moon of the Blood Beast, Meathook Massacre: The Final Chapter) and he had a humble request to give the once over for a new Harley Wallen film. Director Harley Wallen (Deceitful, Moving Parts, Bennett's Song, Abeyance and Betrayed) has a new action thriller so let's give it an eyeful. This is Eternal Code.


Honey, I think this Craigslist orgy is wrong now.












We open with a young man on the ragged edge, hastily scribbling notes and pulls a USP .45 to clear his mind when a young prostitute, Stephanie (Kaiti Wallen of Moving Parts, Bennett's Song, Iced Out and Betrayed) is getting slapped around by her would-be John (Brian Heintz of Moving Parts, Lizard of Dogs, Betrayed, Revenge of the Mask, Ring of Silence and Be Somebody). Naturally the need to help another puts our suicidal lad Corey (Damien Chinappi of The Web of Spider-Man, Knightmare, Retribution, The Girl in the Attic, Betrayed and I Thought You Were a Nice Man) off his coconut scrambling ideas and proceeds to lay smack down on the puke and they disappear into the night.

Basing this story on Juan Ponce de Leon's(Conquistador, explorer, soldier and first governor of Puerto Rico) discovery of the fountain of eternal youth, a genetic research company has developed a miracle cure. One that will enrich human life for, shockingly enough for the rich and powerful. The idea of infinitely prolonging human life and slowing the aging process.


Hobo Hero...












However, the methods to bring this miraculous creation to be was immoral and completely unethical. The company's CEO Bridget Pellegrini (Erika Hoveland of Sparkle, Mary's Buttons, Ticket to the Circus, The House That Jack Broke, Believe Again, Proxy and Good News) wants to pull the plug and not watch her empire to go crumbling down. Her board of directors is trying to coax her to the dark side with promises of money and chocolate chip cookies and hey if you can't trust Oliver (Richard Tyson of 3 o'Clock High, Kindergarten Cop, There's Something About Mary, Battlefield Earth and Black Hawk Down) well, who can you trust?


Who took my smiley face mug? You Gary? Hmm?

 










The looks on the interns and lower echelon workers, seems to me a typical board meeting. Screaming and scheming is the order of the day, if not the week. Dr. Magnus (Yan Birch of Slumber Party Massacre III, The People Under the Stairs, Cyber Bandits, Ghost Rock, Terror Tales, Death House and Betrayed) also attempts to get Bridget to see the benefits that outweigh the repercussions. C'mon Bridget, the Stairmaster is right!  At least Mr. Pomeroy (Mel Novak of Game of Death, An Eye for an Eye, Sword of Heaven, Moonbase, Vampire Assassin, Thunderkick, Kill Factor, Syndicate Smasher, Holy Terror and Nemesis 5: The New Model) has her back. GO STICK!   I swear I will try to stop doing that.

Ongoing concern about this merger veto even hits home with Bridget's husband Mark (Billy Wirth of The Lost Boys, Body Snatchers, Reunion, The Talent Given Us, Duress, Chicago P.D., Last Curtain Call and Betrayed). He expresses he just doesn't want her getting hurt and is there to support her while he is making dinner. Damn right she put a ring on it!


Diabolical deeds done via Vida!












Corey and Stephanie slowly gain a rapport as two people broken by life are trying to mend. Two people guarding who they are opening up in a fashion they didn't think even possible again.

Oliver is done playing nice and contracts a crew to capture and contain Bridget and family. This nefarious piece of work, Sam (Harley Wallen of Moving Parts, Love Espionage: Spy Revenge, Halt: The Motion Picture, Betrayed, Be Somebody and Eternal Code) tells Oliver 5 million upfront so they can have a location for the kidnapping and another five once completed.

Considering kidnapping is a federal offense, yeah his team is gonna need the scratch to avoid prosecution. Costa Rica would be ideal.

With Bridget out of the way, Magnus can start the trials with the aid of Nikita (the vivacious Vida Ghaffari of Circus of Dread, The Catch, Holy Terror, Horndog's Beach Party, Robowoman, Moon of the Blood Beast and Meathook Massacre: The Final Chapter) and her talents.

With Corey and Stephanie trying to find out what happened to Bridget and Mark, time is ticking down. Can a burned out Vet and a street walker save the day? Will the company collapse?



This is just some damn good story telling. We got heart and soul of good people, that grim and gritty darkness of the villains and business being dealt regardless of the damage that it could produce. A solid thriller, good dialogue and an impressive cast, I have to say this Indie thriller is damn captivating. A nice slow build-up to give you all you need to know about the players and then, something new happens. Take notes, A-list films. This is how good yarn spinning is done. Does it need a sequel? Maybe not but I would like to see this cast brought back for a similar project. Took me ages to realize Charlie was Scout Taylor-Compton (Charmed, Halloween, Halloween II, NCIS Los Angeles, Wet and Reckless and Nashville). Brain was expecting her to be blonde. Smooth move, brain.

Just a side note here. Damien and Kaiti had real chemistry. I really hope to see them in more work. Maybe give them villain roles this time around. Sinister and brutal. Again all just ideas to toss out there. A tale of morality versus injustice. Strong character development for a 105 minute film. Excellent playing off each others emotions and I especially enjoyed Richard Tyson having next to no morals. Vicious character.

September 6 is a release of VOD on iTunes, Amazon, GooglePlay, Vudu and FandangoNow and the DVD release is scheduled later in the fall. Keep those eyes peeled, people!

Ho boy, Joker crew.

Friday, August 16, 2019

Finding Purpose


And we are back. Hello ladies and gentlemen. I was going to follow up Ninja Death with its sequel when the lovely and talented Dawna Lee Heising (Blade Runner, Kung Fu: The Movie, Big Trouble in Little China, Forbidden Warrior, Waiting for Dracula, Legend of the Red Reaper, Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance, Meathook Massacre II and Nemesis 5: The New Model) made request of me directly to take a look at today's cinematic, and who am I to refuse a lady her humble request? A compelling story of brotherly love, a fight of what is the law and what is morally right. Being helmed by writer/director John Reign (Bullets for Jesus, Snuff: Diary of a Serial Killer, Exorcism of the 7th Demon, Blood Woods and Brokedown) it looks like it should be a bit heart wrenching. This is Finding Purpose.


Um, pack of cigarettes?












With an all too familiar tale of a soldier that has fought for his country with distinction, Sergeant John Kayhill (John Reign of Bullets for Jesus, Destitute, Snuff: Diary of a Serial Killer, Brokedown, Finding Purpose and On the Arm) fought in the Bosian War and saved his men out of a serious slug throw fest that was that ambush.

25 years later, he is reduced to living in a trailer with no job prospects, the power and water being shut off and caring for his mentally handicapped brother, Rodney (cinematographer/actor Thomas Stoops of Wormwood's End, Blood Woods, Brokedown and Finding Purpose). Naturally Social Services had a field day with this, gathered the cops and took Rodney away from John due to unfit environment. Rodney is scared and the change in his life will have devastating effects for years to come. Furthermore, John is deemed less than savory to be around his brother at all and loses rights to visit him. Yeah folks, rock bottom is sinking in.


This a bug hunt, man. Game Over!












Not leaving a brother in the lurch, John's old army buddies decide they would help John and concoct a jail break for Rodney. Cue The Great Escape theme! Loaded with some getaway cash and a ride, the brothers are on their way to wherever the road takes theme.

A quick stop off at a strip club (no folk, no zombies.) and John reconnects with the lovely Skye (Dawna Lee Heising) and they see each other with seasoned but kind eyes. A shcmuck with a fat wallet, attitude and frankly in need of a serious ass whipping grabs young dancer Anna (April Love of Creed II, Finding Purpose and Volition). John's having none of this and well you know the fight is on. With the law not taking kind for this sort of action, April joins John and Rodney on the road.
The comaraderie is there and sometimes misery is beaten back by having company. A journey of the soul and simple dreams to be met. A mixture of the family you come from to the family you make.

Keep in mind, we have all the elements of a thriller/action drama with a thirty something ex-Special Forces badass and all the pithy one liners to be had. Instead with we have a down on his luck guy in his fifties that has integrity and duty. Honestly I appreciate this fresher look to it rather than a drag out action exploitation film without any real meaning and a huge body count.




So many taboo subjects that cause polite society to turn a deaf ear to. Mentally handicapped, to impoverished to near homeless veterans to the mere cruelty that is life. Imagine all these woes that John could have walked away from but his heart, his soul and his very honor would not allow such.

This film is not demanding special treatment or being preachy about bad things happen to good people. What this story is telling the audience that life will throw some wicked curve balls and you have the choice to wallow in your own pity or rise up and meet the challenge. It is that courage to tell this story that really makes the film. Some damn good hand held work, excellent blocking and a very professional vibe on the indie budget.

Call me Boris one more time...I dare you.












 As many of you know, I have...endured some indie films that have looked like a failed high school student with a handy cam and a bottle of Thunderbird got it in his/her head to put a film out there. Not so here. Our director allows a peek into his very life as his late brother was mentally challenged and that love and pain translates from the page to the screen. An authentic glimpse to the highs and lows of the family that must be strong. This was a tight cast and crew. A great cast, memorable moments and great performance. So impressive this film; that a sequel has been green lit and I think they will knock it out of the ball park.

Okay so who order the Moons over My Hammy?

Tuesday, August 13, 2019

Ninja Death


Okay, back from the hiatus. I have been working on freelance writing as well as, a radio script known as Fiends and Flatfoots. Basically Noir meets Horror. That however is not what we are enduring today. So combing through the more obscure 80s films, I noticed the 50 to 100 disc collections of martial arts, three titles and their alternative titles keep coming up so I thought I would take a gander at this. This is Ninja Death a.k.a. Ninja Kid.


Pajama Party!












No time for credits, introduction or story build-up! Yeah I am serious. This opens up with Samurai spilling Ninja blood. A gathering of warriors, their grand master watching over a princess with a baby and attempt to escape their capture and deaths. Guess we just dive into the action. This ridiculous fast pace is the first five minutes. With that in mind, the princess hurls herself off the cliff (clearly a dummy) and one of the brothers makes off with the baby.

Then for some reason we still skip title cards and have years later tag and fade.

Finding our protagonist Tiger (Alexander Rei Lo of Kung Fu Commandos, Shaolin vs Ninja, Shaolin vs Lama, Mafia vs Ninja, Shadow Killers Tiger Force and Ninja: The Final Duel) in a brothel and a cadre of pointless sex scenes (Yeah boys, there's titty!). The dialogue among the prostitutes sounds like it was written for a porno. Stay classy, movie.


Chinese Gandalf is most vexed.












Gobsmack amount of nudity, this bit of pointlessness is all leading up to intro of a brother and sister that work for Tiger. Tiger makes the brother engage in tons of montage training footage. Seriously, this all look like B footage set aside for filler. Also the grand master has to make a fabulous entrance worthy of Rip Taylor. He send the brother out to converse with a blind soothsayer because...why the hell not. The dubbing goes from American English to the Queen's English throughout this whole scene.

For some reason we have a gaggle of ninja trying to still find Tiger and the siblings. The Grand master has a bunch of ninja along with one wearing a devil mask, who goes completely mental every time the Grand master plays the flute. Who knew that could be a trigger?

With more fighting we see the devil masked ninja is actually Tiger's brother. Okay we have tons to get through.


Ninja Casual












 Firstly, the movie just abruptly starts as well as ends. I mean there weren't any title cards on either the beginning or the end of the film. I am baffled to what the hell I was watching.

After a bit of research, I found out this film and its sequels is actually all one movie that was diced up to make for sequels. This was a friggin' acid trip. Nothing of coherent for story, acting or even a decent explanation. This is either a brilliant bypass to story telling or a garbled hot mess.

Enough interest for me to see if the sequels would actually make ANY sense of this. What the hell, I'll give the second film a whirl.


Hmm decent Slipknot mask.

Friday, August 2, 2019

Night of the Creeps


Heya kids I am back and we are going for some 80s throwback. Why 80s? Well they are some of the most outlandish, bizarre and risk taking with stories. We are back with Tom Atkins (Escape from New York, The Howling, The Fog, The Rockford Files Halloween 3: Season of the Witch and Maniac Cop) and his awesome power imbuing mustache which has served him well via the 1980s and our film is being handled by writer/director Fred Dekker (House, The Monster Squad, If Looks Could Kill, Ricochet, Tales from the Crypt and Robocop 3) so expected weirdness. This is Night of the Creeps.


Yeah I didn't get lead, got stuck as love interest.













With an alternative title of Homecoming Night; our film already has cult classic status, as if college wasn't a difficulty enough but they now must contend with the Homecoming Dance. In the far away time of 1959, a spacecraft race to find an experiment from getting released by a member of the crew. This container holding said experiment crash lands on Earth.

A couple are parking and necking when they follow the path of a shooting star. An criminally insane patient has recently escaped and meets the creature, the aliens were in hot pursuit. A slug like creature makes the nutter butter even more crazy as he engages in a little axe murder. Said creature glurks out of ax murderer's mouth and the now ex-boyfriend captures it in a container.


Yes I am the hard ass. give it a squeeze.












30 years later... Sorry love the ellipses.  At any rate, 30 years later we have a gaggle of teens headed to college, jammed pack with hormones and need for identity.  Two frat pledges, Chris (Jason Lively of Brainstorm, National Lampoon's European Vacation, Monday Morning, Rock 'n' Roll High School Forever and Maximum Force) and JC (Steve Marshall of Night Heat, 21 Jump Street, Justice Denied and Sleeping in a Dream) end up releasing our film's evil McGuffin and the guy frozen in '59 and out and about infecting brohans and making slug wagons (pithy euphemism for zombies controlled by semi-intelligent, intergalactic slugs).


Damn Zombrohan! Use a door!












Chris while freaked out by the walking dead guy, he makes his way to the dance. Meanwhile the cops get a report from the cryogenics department in this small town college and head of investigations is none other that Detective Cameron (Tom Atkins of The Fog, The Howling, Halloween III: Season of the Witch and Maniac Cop), a hard-assed, bad ass on the ragged edge. Probably two weeks from retirement. He recognizes the frozen body as it was the kid from '59 that disappeared all those years ago. Cameron has to get to the bottom of all this.

And before it is asked, yes there is mild nudity so thank the gods we cleared up the age old question I get. "Will there be titty?" With Chris, Cynthia and Cameron working together, the slug wagons attack the prom pre-party for some monster mayhem. Still love that Cameron happened to have a flame thrower in police armory. In a small town. Totally believable.

The cluster of ideas and themes blends pretty well together with a mixture of 1950s Sci-fi alien invasions the zombie craze courtesy of George Romero, a dash of slasher film and even some teenage touchy feely dialogue worthy of John Hughes.

With seven days this script was penned by the director, selling the product with the notation, unless he directed it, he wasn't selling the script. The granite hew balls on this guy! Tristar floats him $5 million for his 1986 release. Not too shabby. While the gross was only about five hundred thousand in gross box office, this film did better with the video rental crowd and became a cult classic.



A quick side note. All main characters' last names are the names of famous Horror directors, Bruce Solomon's Sgt Raimi (Sam Raimi of The Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2: Dead by Dawn), Jill Whitlow's Cynthia Cronenberg (David Croneneberg of Scanners, Videodrome, The Dead Zone and The Fly) Wally Taylor's Detective Landis (John Landis of The Blues Brothers, An American Werewolf in London and Innocent Blood) Jason Lively's Chris Romero (George A. Romero of Night of the Living Dead, Dawn of the Dead, Martin, Day of the Dead, Creepshow and Monkey Shines). There really is no one category for this film as it is comedy, horror, sci-fi and action.

This is another one of those flicks you can't simply quantify and group. Last film tidbit, Fred Dekker was roommates with Shane Black and they both worked on the script. Later Shane Black would go on to writing Lethal Weapon and Predator.   Scream Factory released a collector's edition Blu-ray a month ago. Considering it was in bootleg territory in 2005, it is nice to see it getting some love in the current format.

Evil slugs or sentient turds?