Welcome to the tales of long ago. In these realms lurks yet another alternative
title for the week. Now let us speak of
days of high adventure! Sorry it is
really hard to break out of that speech pattern. Ahem, grab your furry moon boots, sharpen
your blade and mind. This is Ator, the Invincible a.k.a. Ator, the Fighting
Eagle, Ator: The Fighting Eagle, Ator I’invincibile and Ator the Mighty.
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| Call dibs on the gold and jewel encrusted nut cup! |
The Spoiler of Torren
will bring about the dawning of a new age!
Director producer Joe D’Amato (Papaya: Love Goddess of the
Cannibals, Anthropophagus, Erotic Delights and The Blade Master) is
known for the following concepts: Over the top sci-fi fantasy with zero budget,
Women In Prison Films and hard core pornography as I just found out the
last. Yes so you can already see the slippery slope
that awaits us all. The story of Ator
unfolds with enough exposition that would have flabbergasted Tolkien. Seriously that was incredibly long winded to
the point of being worthy of a narration via Uwe Boll movie. Only it was not continuous. Our young lad Ator (Miles O’ Keefe of Tarzan, the Ape
Man, The Legend of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, Sins of the Night, Shoot,
Marked Man and Silent Hunter) has grown into a family that is not of
his own. He has feelings for his adopted
sister Sunya (Ritza Brown of Beyond Good and Evil, From Hell to Victory, Monsignor
and Tuareg: The Desert Warrior) and asks his foster father for her hand
in marriage.
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| Ye olde Keg Partay!!! |
Yay! Almost incest
for the start of our heroic tale all of 5 minutes in and boy who wouldn’t want
that. Father comes clean about Ator’s
heritage and is overjoyed at the weird impending nuptials. Father then speaks of a man name of Griba (Edmund
Purdom of Sword of Freedom, Herod the Great, Anthropophagus, and Zombies 5: Killing
Birds) that is destined to be his teacher in combat and the ways of the
warrior so he may one day fulfill his prophecy of defeating the ancient spider
god and his cult, laying claim to his birthright and allowing peace throughout
the land.
Thank God it wasn’t a tall
order for him right? Note that quests
are never something as easy as fetch hither yon goat milk for my breakfast
cereal my son. For the morning meal truly is the most important of the day!!!
No sooner is Ator and
Sunya married that Dakkar (Dakar of Zombie, Zombie Holocaust, Pierino
Strikes Again and Ator, The Fighting Eagle), priest of the spider god’s
men ransack the village and slay just about everyone in the area, slap Ator
silly and scoop up his sister/bride. Yea
I am still skived on that. Sorry.
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| AHH!!!! BLIND DEAD FLASHBACKS!!!! |
Ahem, Ator trains with Griba to better his might and mind
when he encounters a young amazon warrior Roon (Sabrina Siani of Blue Island,
Daughter of the Jungle, Gunan, King of the Barbarians and Palla al centro)
who had to be saved by a man. Snort, snort!! The
two form an alliance to fight the dark knights of Dakkar, fend off the legions
of the undead and do battle with the spider god (Squiggly)!
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| No wait, that's poison oak. Ah crap! |
Um it is long winded, confusing plot, the story drags in
places. The swordfights are not badly
choreographed and some of the effects are decent enough but all in all this
film is cheesy and ain’t no Gouda. This
is a fair enough adventure but you will find yourself snickering quite a
bit. A great attempt with not nearly
enough funds behind it or proper time to edit; I am giving this a C minus overall.
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