Hey gang! Yeah I'm back for more
Obscure Italian Horror movies. Say, what is more odd than a Lucio
Fulchi movie? Well anything created solely by writer/director
Claudio Fragasso (Monster Dog, Zombi 3, Strike Commando
2, After Death, Troll 2 and The Squad). Claudio is
responsible for several Bruno Mattei films via "writing".
Bringing such goofiness as Hell of the Living Dead, Guardian of
Hell, Women's Prison Massacre, Rats: Night of Terror, Strike
Commando, Double Target, Robowar, Cop Game, Zombi 3 and Shocking Dark
has been most of the knock offs
that Horror, Action and Sci-fi has flooded the market for more than
30 years.
Our
odd creation today is deemed an unofficial sequel due to mass
distribution of a series of every five years to having translation
errors that often occur. With the titles of Ghosthouse 2,
Evil Dead 5, House
5 and Horror House
II, it actually is no wonder
most people cannot find this even at Wal-Mart. The most common
official title of our movie is found in Amazon so by God let's go
with that. This is Beyond
Darkness.
Kids, stop playing with dark forces and go take your baths. |
First
off, IMDB's synopsis is crap as our minister turns out to be a priest
so already huge separation between Catholic and Protestant faith.
Secondly, since when does a priest have a family?? Yup I was a
trifle baffled at this. Father George (David Brandon of
She, Cave Dwellers a.k.a. The Blade Master, The Lost City, Warrior
Queen, Eleven Days, Eleven Nights and The Maharaja's Daughter)
gives the last rites to a serial child killer and attends her
execution. She claims to have devoured their souls and thus giving
her power over the world. Her wacky Satanic bible apparently effects
the father making him (ALL TOGETHER NOW) question his faith.
Father
Peter (Gene Lebrock of Santa Barbara, Fortress of
Amerikkka: The Mercenaries, Metamorphosis, Night of the Beast and
Fatal Choice) moves his
family into a less than savory house. Less all white exterior like
say Amityville Horror but a house that definitely defies logic and
registers at least a 8 on the Weird Crap 'O Meter.
The
good father and his wife Annie (Barbara Bingham of The
Octagon, Splitz, Death Mask, The Colbys, Real Men, Knots Landing,
Friday the 13th Part VIII:
Jason Takes Manhattan and Cop Target)
start to notice odd sounds and sights and begin to wonder if they got
this house under other reasons. With a little background
investigation (GOOGLE IT DAMMIT!!)
we find out that the house was built on the same land when twenty
witches lost their britches because all went up in flames via
witch hunt and trials.
Witch wardrobe brought to you by Glad bags. |
It is
almost as Father George's faith was the only thing keeping these maleficent spirits at bay as they are tormenting the family of which
one of the children is none other than Michael Stephenson
of Troll 2 and The
Paper Brigade. Ahh Troll
2...what dog flop. George combines his forces with Peter and they
are MEGA PRIEST!!! Actually they engage the spirits in the rites of
exorcism but Mega Priest sounded cooler. Would have settled for
Captain Catholic too. Can the padres duo banish the spirits??
Will their faith waiver?? Will Pazuzu of Exorcist II: The Heretic
make an appearance?
Let's
break it down. The practical appliances and effects aren't bad, just
dated. A lot of dry ice and back lighting was used so you know there
wasn't a huge budget and everyone is written like a one dimensional
stereotype. Our pace is dragging so much that snails begin to lap
us, the intentions and ideas behind this film clearly feel like they
have been lifted from both Poltergeist and The Exorcist but poorly
executed. It was said at one point, Fragasso's people tried to get
Linda Blair into the project but she shot that down toot sweet. B-
for effort, fellas but the lady can do more than spit pea soup. As
far as DVD releases this seems to be only found as a double feature
for George Eastman's Metamorphosis on Blu-ray. Yea not even a DVD
release.
Confessions of a Priest...The Behind Bars Edition! |
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