Rotten Reelz Reviews Video Review #3: Billy the Kid vs Dracula

The wait is over.  The completion has happened.   I'm finally done with the damn thing!

Billy the Kid vs Dracula video review is available right here

Enjoy!   Or you know, don't.  Hey it's a bizarre flick plus my own stuff added to it.

I have no pants and took two little blue pills. Muahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!

Bloodsucker Sequels: Dracula II: The Ascension

Hiya gang and welcome back for Day 4 of Bloodsucker Sequels. Hey remember when director/writer Patrick Lussier retold the legend of Dracula in the year 2000? Thus getting the title Dracula 2000? What ever became of Simon Shepard and Mary Van Helsing? Did they ever drag down the smoking remains of Dracula and entomb in the crypt under Carfax Abbey? What if none of those questions will be answered at all? Then you would have a sequel ignoring its own storyline. This is Dracula II: Ascension.

Hey, that's not Gerald Butler!

So the fairly well spoken narrative of Mary being her father's daughter and the keeper of Dracula's remains...yeah we can toss that notion right out the window. RETCON! Hours after Dracula transmogrifies to Mr. Crispy due to intense ultraviolet rays he is wheeled into the morgue.  Prior to this reveal is our beginning story in Transylvania with Father Uffizi (Jason Scott Lee of Back to the Future II, Ghoulies Go to College, Map of the Human Heart, Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story, The Jungle Book, Tale of the Mummy, Soldier, Lilo & Stitch, Timecop: The Berlin Decision and The Prophecy: Forsaken and Seventh Son) with twin vamp girls (Jennifer Kroll of Weird Science, Cybill and Dracula II: Ascension) when he was injured by one of the vamps corrupting him. He walks in the sun and flogs himself to purge the evil.

Now according to a friend of mine who watched this with the commentary on; it was stated that the master of vampires' body was swapped for another and Mary ended up claiming another charred corpse and stowed him away. Apparently that scene just wasn't worth filming or maybe it hit the cutting floor. There goes her pre-natural senses. Interns Luke (Jason London of Dazed and Confused, Mixed Signals, Broken Vessels, The Rage: Carrie 2, Jason and the Argonauts and Grind)and Liz (Diane Neal of Dracula II: Ascension, Second Born, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, NCIS, Power, Suits and NCIS: New Orleans) work to move the body for an experimentation when they see the body healing on its own from third degree burns of bone and ash.

Jeremy? Jason here.  Look I'm not feeling this role. Cover for me?

Professor Lowell (Craig Sheffer of Nightbreed, A River Runs Through It, Hellraiser: Inferno, One Tree Hill and The Mark) suffering from palsy feels this is the real first step to repairing his on diseased cells. Along for the ride of science and the macabre is fellow intern/students Kenny (Khary Payton of Street Sharks, Certain Guys, Latter Days, Marvel: Ultimate Alliance, Teen Titans, Friday: The Animated Series, Ben 10, The Sims 3, Marvel: Ultimate Alliance 2 and Young Justice) and bubbly Tanya (Brande Roderick of Club Wild Side 2, Stripper Wives, Baywatch, Baywatch: Hawaiian Wedding, Starsky & Hutch, Lucky 13 and The Daily Habit). So off to flirt with damnation and death then!

A middle man Eric meets to explain that large sacks of money are on their way if the kids play ball. Lowell goes on to explain the mythos of Dracula as he can apparently change his appearance after every resurrection (Hang on a tic, that's the Doctor's racket you hornin' in on, mate!) and their paltry explaination why Gerald Butler is not reprising his former role but now a platinum blonde man (Stephen Billington of Out of the Blue, Highlander: The Raven, Cornation Street, Resident Evil, Young Arthur, The Prophecy: Uprising, A Life in Suitcases and Hollyoaks) who flirts with Liz. With Luke being the only real one of sound mind, he goes shopping for holy water, knotted rope and seeds following the vampire mythos of their need to untie knots, count seeds and well holy water probably burns like the Dickens. Meanwhile, Father Uffizi is on the trail for Dracula as well and Heaven help whomever stops him.

Will tampering with Dracula lead to bodies hitting the floor? Should Luke pour holy water all over himself? Can Liz stop flittering between her collective men?

Patrick Lussier really wanted Dracula to be the pinnacle apex of evil so Billington claims to be to be Gilles de Rais (Knight and Marshal who was a companion at arms with Joan of Arc dabbled in satanism and child murder), Vlad Tepes (House of Draculesti, Prince of Wallachia and Vlad the Impaler), Proximus (Dux or General of Roman Legion) and of course Judas the Betrayer. It was if though Dracula was not evil enough and had to show the audience oh yes, this is a very bad man in case SOMEHOW you forgot that. While the first film dealt with shades of gray (Not 50!), Lussier feels the need to hammer it in your skull that Dracula is the personification of all that is evil. Subtle touch.

The effects of CGI blood and practical are a decent mesh but I would have preferred more practical vs CGI. It captures better on film. Jason Scott Lee's character is a righteous wrathful man that seems like the instrument of righteous cruelty rather than a man of God so it was interesting watching him balance the two sides of himself. Location wise this is a gorgeous region of hills, mountains and township to capture on film and connected in the heart of the mythos and Stoker's own writings. Overall this is not a bad movie but it does contradict a lot of the first film. 

OoOoOo he has the sweeping cloak effect going.

Vampires Reborn: Dracula 2000

Back again for Day 4 of Vampires Reborn and today's title is very apt. The origin of the stories spoken and written brings about a different take on a character that hails from an age-old monster that haunts many dreams, fascinate others and terrifies several. A creature that lacks a reflection, has hatred of all things Christian and seems to have a vulnerability to silver. This is Dracula 2000.

Jeri Ryan as a vampire?? Hmm...

Deep in the heart of London, Matthew Van Helsing (Christopher Plummer of The Silent Partner, Murder by Decree, Highpoint, Dreamscape, Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country, Dolores Claiborne and A Beautiful Mind) a descendant of the 19^th century country doctor that fought Dracula owns an antique shop working along side his protege Simon Sheppard (Jonny Lee Miller of Hackers, Trainspotting, Plunket & Macleane, Mindhunters, Endgame and Elementary) as they are about to close down for the holiday as Helsing's secretary Solina (Jennifer Esposito of Summer of Sam, Spin City, The Bachelor, Beyond the City Limits, Taxi, Samantha Who?, Blue Bloods and She's Funny That Way)needs a few signatures and she discretely shoots Simon down for a romantic getaway. That being said, Simon is off for the night and Matthew retires for the night. A cadre of thieves break into the Carfax Abbey building, bypass his security and head into a large catacombs but this was only the modern security. A few deadly traps killing a member of the crew and they still move on, stealing a silver coffin which the thieves assume is the treasure to be had.

You almost hit a mime!

Escaping with the goods with a flight to New Orleans, the coffin is opened releasing the prince of darkness himself, Dracula (Gerard Butler of Attila, Shooters, The Jury, Reign of Fire, 300, Gamer, How to Train Your Dragon and Olympus Has Fallen) who dispatches his would-be captors with ease and ended up crashing the plane outside of New Orleans.

Helsing gets on a plane and heads out for the crash-site, only to followed by Simon and then things get a bit kooky. Not having a CSI in this tiny town, the buddies were brought to a school only to release freshly made vampires. Simon quickly comes to terms that the monsters were real and helps end them. Matthew explains that he is actually Abraham and kept Dracula prisoner all these centuries, using Dracula's blood to prolong his life until he could figure a way to dispose of him forever.

Dracula bound by blood, seeks Helsing's daughter Mary (Justine Waddell of Great Expectations, Chaos, The Fall, Target and Killing Bono) as they are connected on a psychic level. Helsing and Simon must get to Mary before Dracula does and stop him as quickly as possible.

A few points of interest on the film. The name of Helsing's antique shop is named Carfax Abbey, the name of the house Dracula moved into in Stoker's novel. Actress/singer Vitamin C playing Lucy Westerman works in Virgin Megastore and you can clearly see one of her own albums on the rack. I noticed it seem we were less likely in London and more so in Toronto.

Not a brilliant movie but a new spin on an old thing. I have seen far lesser Dracula films and trust me on that.

So you are... gifted then?

Horror of 1970 Week: Scars of Dracula

What’s happenin’ babies?  Okay got that out of my system and welcome to Horror of 1970 Week.  This week we trowel some B Movies of the year and we shall see if we find any gems or diamonds in the rough rather than a polished turd.  So let’s commence with a Hammer Film of the vampiric nature starring our favorite Prince of Darkness, Dracula so fasten your crosses to a lapel, prep your rings of garlic and put an edge on that stake.  This is Scars of Dracula.

 

His eyes are so scary the credits tremble.

Klove: You fools!  You think you can destroy my spoiler??!!  The flames will never reach him!

As in the previous films there is of course the recap from its predecessor giving us the highlights of what was then and why the monster returns yet again to wreak chaos on the land and the villagers. We see Dracula’s remains, his cape and a pile of dried blood and dust left on the altar in said church.  Alice saved by Paul shudder at Dracula’s agonizing death and leave.   However, a large bat flies in the church dribbling blood from its fangs on to the powdered, desiccated remains only to resurrect the vampire once again.

Villager rabble and cookout!

A year later the villagers summon the nerve to attack the Castle Dracula after yet another village girl died at his hand and they burn the Castle while the Count is actually snoozing away in a crypt away from the castle.  After their arsonist deeds, the villagers return to find every woman and child hid in the church to be slaughtered by bats.  

Accused of raping the burgomasters’ daughter (she was spurned by Paul) Paul Carlson (Christopher Matthews of Some Like It Sexy, Scream and Scream Again and See No Evil) fled from the Kleinenberg officials by leaping into a handy coach and while it lacked a driver it takes off with great velocity.  The coach deposits him off to the slightly ruined Castle Dracula where the lord of manor and his mistress Tania (Anouska Hempel of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, Tiffany Jones and Black Snake).    After dinner and given his room to stay Tania and Paul…have a brief little liaison of the flesh when Dracula comes barging in, slaps Paul aside like a rag doll and skewers Tania with a dagger.  He locks Paul in his room and hands Tania to Klove (Patrick Troughton of Hamlet, Doctor Who, Sinbad and the Eye of the Tiger, The Omen and Knights of God) to dispose of her.  Paul attempts an escape but is trapped in a room with a locked door and a coffin at his feet.

Now the frat's hazing can be...rough.

Sometime later Paul’s brother Simon (Dennis Waterman of The Sweeny, Sweeny!, Sweeny 2, Back in Business and New Tricks) and Paul’s fiancée Sarah (Jenny Hanley of On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, The Flesh and Blood Show, Saturday Night at the Mill and West Country Tales) are attempting to retrace Paul’s whereabouts and remove this stigma on his good name.   The reluctance of the authorities makes Simon a bit concerned but little does he know what truly happens in this village.

I wanted to make a few points of interest in this film.  Christopher Lee has a lot more to do, better dialogue and still quite menacing.  The cinematography as always amazing and their collection of scale model and deep woods was so impressive and the landscape paintings were quite detailed. The violence is greater and sexuality a bit more freely than back in the day however I feel the ending is a bit anti-climatic as it feels like they were running out of ideas.   Just my take on it but if you are a Hammer fan give it some love and the once over.

Hammer Features Week: Dracula: Prince of Darkness

Hello and welcome back to Hammer Features Week.  Now it is rare I tackle a sequel directly after reviewing its original source but I thought this could be entertaining and therefore how could I refuse?

We hark to the year of our lord 1966 where director Terence Fisher (The Curse of Frankenstein, Hound of the Baskervilles, The Mummy and Horror of Dracula) has procured another helping of horror to the dish of dismay, this dinner of detestation…yeah now I am just flexing my vocabulary.  Dreadfully sorry about that behavior, it won’t happen again for a while.    So hang the garlic cloves around your windows, don your crucifix and prepare for battles with the undead.  This is Dracula: Prince of Darkness.

Dracula's tale told through The Eye of Sauron.

After a reign of hideous terror, spanning more than a century, the King of the Spoiler was finally traced to his lair high in the Carpathian mountains.

It has been ten years, ten quiet years since Doctor Van Helsing had done battle with the lord of the undead Dracula and won. Dracula had faced an adversary armed with the knowledge of dispatching vampirism and the dark lord’s arrogance was his own undoing.   The villagers quietly rejoice but remain vigilant of any strangers, stragglers or persons unknown.  To not allow them to disturb the town of Karlsbad in the remote region of the castle of Dracula the peasants remain cordial but wary.  Four young travelers from England are visiting the countryside to broaden their horizons.   They have chosen to dine and relax in the local tavern with a large well armed priest wanders from off the road in need of libation and a warm meal.

  Father Sandor (Andrew Keir of Sword of Freedom, Ivanhoe, The Four Just Men, Cleopatra, Macbeth and Daleks’ Invasion Earth: 2150 A.D.) greets the Kent family four but urges them to avoid Karlsbad.  Our young travelers are baffled at the mention of this castle because the maps show nothing in that area but the good father assures them the castle is there and they should not go.   Naturally the good father’s warnings are chocked up to being poppycock and tom foolery.  The Kent family travels until almost evening when the coach driver pulls over, demands they vacate the carriage and even threatens them at dagger point for them to leave.  

Now dear what could possibly go wrong?

Confused for a place to stay for the night is a shabby cabin to lodge in or they can walk the two kilometers (1.24 miles for the Americans.  Stupid metric system.) into Karlsbad.    As luck would have it, quite possibly a writing device, a driverless coach appears with two black stallions.  Our party cannot believe their good fortune and head off…with the ominous omens and portents here!

And now I have just a few tidbits and bonmots about the film.   

Once again I am always floored by the costuming and sets Hammer brought to life.    The haunting chords of composer James Bernard sets the scene well and keeps the mood throughout the film.

Now be honest, am I getting long in the tooth?

Christopher Lee (Horror of Dracula, The Three Musketeers, The Man with the Golden Gun, Dracula and Son and Star Wars: Episode II- Attack of the Clones) is completely without dialogue the whole film.  The rumormill churned out such fabrications to Lee was being a diva and insisted Dracula would never say such things.  Another story is the screenwriter felt vampires had no need for idle chat or tete-a-tete  so that being said Lee was to have no lines at all.  

Take your pick on which you choose to believe.  

Hammer Features Week: Horror of Dracula

Okay you horror nuts have a decent one for you all.  Harkin back to 1958 when Dracula was tall, majestic and all the while vicious and one would dare say brutal.  So grab your crucifix, holy water and a few stakes.   This is the Horror of Dracula.

There's a trusting face.

Shh there be spoilers on the moors.

Veteran Hammer Film Director Terrence Fisher (The Curse of Frankenstein, Horror of Dracula, The Revenge of Frankenstein, The Hound of the Baskervilles, and The Man Could Cheat Death) brings in my humble opinion a timeless tale of the misdeeds of the Lord of the Vampires.  We open with our movie on Jonathan Harker (John Van Eyssen of Chance Meeting, Four Sided Triangle and Quartermass 2) a mind mannered librarian arriving in Transylvania to catalog Count Dracula’s extensive library but in fact is to investigate Count Dracula (Christopher Lee of Horror of Dracula, The Three Musketeers, The Man with the Golden Gun, Dracula and Son and Star Wars: Episode II- Attack of the Clones) and the possible link he has with a cult of vampirism.  Soon after encountering one of Dracula’s brides, Harker is determined to rid the world of this undead monster, manages to stake the girl but is thereby angered Dracula and is slain by him.

Mmm, just my type. A negative.

 Doctor Van Helsing (Peter Cushing of The Curse of Frankenstein, The Abominable Snowman, The Hound of the Baskervilles, The Brides of Dracula, Dr. Who and the Daleks, Star Wars: Episode IV- A New Hope and Shock Waves) arrives in Transylvania in search of the whereabouts of his associate; only to find Harker had been made a vampire and he slew his former colleague.  He finds a few detailed clues that Dracula has vacated the country in search for Harker’s fiancée, Lucy.  Desperate to catch the fiend before he has the girl under his spell, Helsing rushes back to London in the hopes that he can end Dracula’s tyranny of terror. 

What can I say about this movie?    Well it is one of the Technicolor greats.  Filmed in standard 35mm stock and has two very distinguished British actors Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee.  The film has a good pace and does not leave much time to moll over scene to scene.  The wide angle shots of the castle’s interior will astound you.   The musical score in junction with the exterior castle shots and even those of the graveyard just sends mild chills down the spine. The fog on the graveyard followed by the orchestration just sets the tone of this movie.  Lee’s portrayal of Dracula is one of elegance and object cruelty.  Cushing is steadfast as a hero and you get the feeling would sacrifice his own life to end Dracula. 

I say old sport, you're crinkling my cravat.

Sorry gore fans this is not that messy for you but I think the plot and performances should make up for that.  As for the rest of you that may have grown up on these films as well as your children did.  Pop it in your DVD player and give it the love it deserves.