Welcome back readers if I have any left after Missile to the Moon. Hahahahaha!!! I'm kidding. I would think the rape revenge and women in prison movies would have cost me readers instead of 50's B-movie nonsense. Well I sense from the overall vibe that many felt that yesterday's creature feature was simply not enough creature, in spite of rock monsters and giant spider puppet. Seriously, my mom is terrified of spiders and all that damn thing would have done is made her snort and belly laugh. So today we forge ahead to the far away time of 2004, where a contest to party in the Bermuda Triangle courtesy of MTV. This is Monster Island.
|Obligatory cheesecake shot!|
Our story follows Josh (Daniel Letterie of Camp, Debating Robert Lee, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit and The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green), a teen with his head in the clouds and slacker by nature is off to the Bermuda Triangle to party his time away, gathered with friends to rock out with special guest star hostess of this event, Carmen Electra. So yeah the kid is stoked, obviously to those around him. Of course things can always go bad as the dreaded Nick Carter of the Backdoor Boys is also in this event. Yeah and um giant fauna due to atomic mutations and genetic manipulation. Still Nick Carter? Chilling.
|Yup the acid kicked in already.|
With backstage passes to hang with Carmen, Josh is eyeballed by her security guard/ bodyguard Eightball (C. Ernst Harth of Thir13en Ghosts, Capote, Dead Rising, Scammerhead, Almost Human and Joe Finds Grace). Yup that is his name. No he is not black so that joke is lost. Guessing he is a speed freak perhaps and has a real Bulk of Bulk and Skull via Power Rangers look about him. Jinkies it turns out Carmen has thoughts, opinions and is like a real person. Hey give the lad a break, he's barely 20 or so. He was probably too gobsmack at her looks to kick his brain into high gear. With freak weather happening a giant stop animation bug causes havoc and scoops up Carmen carting her to places unknown.
With partakers fleeing left and right heading for the boats for safety, Josh and a group of devoted Electra fans journey into the unknown jungles to save her. Our party consisting of Maddy (Elizabeth Winstead of Sky High, Final Destination 3, Black Christmas, Death Proof, Live Free or Die Hard, The Thing, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Mercy Street) the gutsy brunette and ex-girlfriend of Josh, Jen C. (Chelan Simmons of It, Special Unit 2, Carrie, Snakehead Terror, Smallville, Chupacabra Terror, Supernatural, Final Destination 3, John Tucker Must Die and Love Under the Stars) the dingy but hopeful aspiring actress/musician, nerdy Andy (Cascy Beddow of Jeremiah, Carrie, The Mall Man, Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed, Life As We Know It, Blade: Trinity and Colony), jock ass and self-centered Chase (Chris Harrison of Smallville, Black Sash, 11:11 and Monster Island)
|K, we'll hang later. Peace.|
This movie dips back into the 1950s grab bag of effects with scale model miniatures, large scale pneumatic armatures and stop motion capture effects of flying creatures. The film tries to play the tongue in cheek jobs with as much seriousness as allowed. Making their way to the caverns or in this case probably lava tubes, the lot encounters Doctor Harryhausen (the late, great Adam West of Batman, The Adventures of Batman and Robin, Superfriends, Zombie Nightmare, Return Fire, Night of the Kickfighters, Mad About You, Black Scorpion, Johnny Bravo, XIII, The Batman, Family Guy and Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders) a mad scientist responsible for most of the gigantic fauna roaming this island paradise and yes a nod to stop animation/visual effects creator Ray Harryhausen (The Animal World, Earth vs.the Flying Saucers, 20 Million Miles to Earth, The Strange World of Planet X, The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, The 3 Worlds of Gulliver, Mysterious Island, Jason and the Argonauts, First Men in the Moon, One Million Years B.C., The Valley of Gwangi and Clash of the Titans).
The script is corny and it's meant to be. Giving love to those old Drive-In movies of the 1950s using the fades and dissolves to models scaled that were super imposed. Almost similar to Mysterious Island in its design.
You get the general vibe that all actors and performers in on this are there for a good time and a paycheck and well it seems just that. Carmen gets to embrace creature feature scream queen status akin to Fay Wray of King Kong or Joan Weldon of Them. It's campy, quirky, sarcastic and overall just damn odd. So naturally I felt a connection to it. Yup beat you all to the punchline, bitches!
Stop-motion animator David Bowes really captures the painstaking effect to make these beasties move along with life-size ant puppeteer George Groove making the ant rigs stomp their way through the kegger.
Yes it is once again slacker/outcast/rebel finds a cause, fights for it risking life and limb and may even get the girl.
Also I am so old I had to look up actress/producer/writer La La Anthony (Gun, Think Like a Man, 1982, Think Like a Man Too, Chi-Raq, Unforgettable and Power) and then it clicked with Unforgettable...but previously I forgot. False advertise, TV series!
|Gahh! You don't get my whimsy, childish behavior, girl!!|