Random Movie: Conquest of the Planet of the Apes

Welcome back readers. I found something interesting. The ratings board put the first three Planet of the Apes under a "G" rating. With gunfights, weapons battles, blood and mild swearing that was a "G" rating. Huh. Could learn something there modern day MPAA. Today is a film that was apparently too violent for the youngins in the crowd they had to bump it up to PG. Savagery, slavery and monstrous behavior on both fronts. This is Conquest of the Planet of the Apes.

Ricardo, someone pinched my butt.

Yeah yeah, back to the damn dirty apes joke blah blah. We return to a totalitarian police state of the United States. In this future a virulent plague wiped out small animals so the natural conclusion is to train apes to be household pets, servants and in general, enslavement. Guess sign language for fresh fruit and bounding around wasn't entertaining enough for the humans.

We catch up with Armando (Ricardo Montalban of Space Seed, The Train Robbers, Wonder Woman, The Mark of Zorro, Joe Panther, Police Story, Fantasy Island, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and Spy Kids 3: Game Over), the circus owner and follower of St. Francis of Assisi, patron saint of animals is back in town to provide amusement to those under tyrannical reign.

Now you all clean up your poops!

 

Milo now named Caesar (Roddy McDowell of The Felony Squad, Planet of the Apes, 5 Card Stud, Night Gallery, A Taste of Evil, The Poseidon Adventure, The Legend of Hell House, Fright Night and Batman The Animated Series) Cornelius and Zira's son from Escape from the Planet of the Apes all grown up baffled why all humans are not like Armando. Armando explains that subterfuge is the only way he can survive and not exhibit higher intelligence or the power of speech because the government fears an ape revolt that will overthrow humanity.

Police states implement order!!!

City Controller Breck (Don Murray of Bus Stop, A Hatful of Rain, Endless Love, Soldier of Fortune, Wings, The Single Guy and Island Prey) is adamant that he will be the man to find Cornelius and Zira's offspring and destroy him for the sake of humanity. So clearly enslaving his people should win him over. Meanwhile his assistant Malcolm (Hari Rhodes of Daktari, Shock Corridor, Detroit 9000, Coma, The Fall Guy, Magnum P.I., Donor and Cover Up) bites his tongue on the racist tendencies shown by white men in power and abusing their authority. May hit too close to home but he does his level best to rein him in when it looks like he is going over the top.

Armando is scooped up by Ape Control which is pretty much this future's Gestapo. Seriously, right down to the all black uniforms, sashes on their arms and brutal mentality. Caesar called the lot bastards and Armando takes the blame without hesitation. They go to town on Armando with beatings and lie detectors trying to find out if he knows whereabouts of Milo now known as Caesar. Knowing his number is up, Armando sacrifices himself to save Caesar.

Caesar infiltrates Ape Control, bides his time and prepares to go to war. Humans stole his parents and his surrogate parent. Revenge on them and liberation of his people is all that is on his mind. With observations of routine and lazy behavior of his human captors, Caesar prepares to win over his people, arm them and mount bloody retribution.

Will the humans survives this? Will apes dominate the world? Can a compromise be made?

The inherent cruelty to the apes pushes this animal lover's buttons something fierce until you remember, "Oh right, those are guys in costume. Unpucker, butthole." Once again SciFi doesn't pull punches about classism, racism and separation covered all in this one film. Subjugation is a way of life that no one seems to question or if they do, it is never out loud. A handful of picketing lines about waiters getting the shaft but other than that, no one even speaks up for the apes. Complete governmental control is as common as breathing and the people don't speak up about curfews, big brother watching its citizens' purchases and work environment?

I mean c'mon. This is exactly what the Trump administration wishes they could get away with.

I won't fib. Of all five of the original Apes films, this is probably the most violent. Do I think the modern day children will be horribly scarred if they watch it? Nah. I would have loved to have seen all five in the theater as a kid rather than chopped up for TV. Hell I didn't see Planet of the Apes unvarnished until I was 25 and at an art theater. So if you enjoyed the previous three films, yes catch this one as well. If anything my own complaint about this movie was the same with the previous three. I just had to go and get the letterbox version. If these flicks don't interest you at all, well why were you reading this review?   Seems a tad silly. 

Ape terrorists equal gorilla warfare.