Happy Friday the 13th!!!

Oh c'mon.  You had to know I was going to comment on that we have had two Friday the 13ths in the year.  Look at some of the tripe I have reviewed over the years.  So it is a hearty Happy Friday the 13th I allot for you and offer some handy tips on surviving the creepy rundown campgrounds.

1) Don't be an ass.  Stupid practical jokes just secure your death warrant.

2) Don't be a mean cow. Hurtful remarks about the creepy girl never goes well as seen in Sleepaway Camp and more than a handful of Friday the 13ths.

3) Don't be a mean jock. That's right no pantsing, noogies and dutch rubs allowed for you will receive a fairly large ax or machete in the six pack abs.

4) No liquor or drugs.  Yes they may sound enticing but these are tools of the slasher and leaves you vulnerable to horrific eye gouging, skull crushing or possibly an entire fist jammed through your ribcage.  Just say no kids.

5)  No bedroom bam bam.  Yes sex will get you killed quicker than drugs, alcohol and a speeding car chase with the local sheriff and his one to two deputies.  Just avoid those come-hither stares and phallic things that girl is doing with an ice cream cone or banana.  Cold showers lad!

Frankly this could all be avoided if you just took that fast food restaurant gig like your dad suggested but no you wanted to have premarital sex, smoke a spliff and chugalug beers so the price for your fun must be paid...in blood...and body parts.

That's no way to get ahead in life!