I had a growth spurt as a boy, dig? |
Bison: The Spring Beauty makes her way to the nest of spoilers.
This movie is solely focused around the life of Chun-Li, from the happy days of learning concert piano and Wu Shu with her father Xiang (Edmund Chen of Ghoststories, The Eye, Police & Thief, Sense of Home and Serangoon Road) to the day he was abducted by a unscrupulous businessman Bison (Neal McDonough of Ravenous, Band of Brothers, Timeline, Walking Tall and Justified) with the assistance of his hulking and bruising bestial of a man Balrog (Michael Clarke Duncan of Armageddon, The Green Mile, The Whole Nine Yards, Planet of the Apes, The Scorpion King, Daredevil, Sin City and Kung Fu Panda) around the age of 12 she has bared this sadness but continued on her studies of Wu Shu and piano as a young woman. Chun Li (Kristin Kreuk of Smallville, Eurotrip, Earthsea and Beauty and the Beast) a headstrong and good hearten 21st Century girl receives an scroll written in the ancient dynasty text that she cannot read, she hurries home to see her mother who is dying of cancer.
Whose scruffy lookin'? |
Meanwhile Bison is consolidating his assets to Bangkok and his corporation Shadaloo is built on syndicate money, informs the heads of these families that their participation in future endeavors is at an end. Rather than jumping the man at dinner, they leave grumbling and are dispatched to Hell by Bison's associate Vega (Taboo of the Black Eyed Peas). After her mother passes away, Chun Li takes the scroll to Hong Kong's shopping district and of course a wise elder will send her on the path that is before her, telling her of a mentor just so suited for her training and blah blah blah.
Plot development 3 offers the Bangkok Gangland Homicide department detective Maya Sunee (Moon Bloodgood of Eight Below, Pathfinder, Day Break and Terminator Salvation) a hard nosed female cop that had to work her way to her badge and you know this reteric. With a forced partnership of Interpol agent Charlie Nash (Chris Klein of Election, American Pie, Rollerball, Caught in the Crossfire and Wilfred) a stereotypical portrayal of a decadent American hard ass with a heart of gold. When these two are clumsily flirting to a point it is painfully obvious there is no chemistry, they are hot on the trail of Bison. Will Chun Li join forces with the cops or will she strike out on her own? Is she there for justice or merely to wipe that smug look off of Bison's face?
Okay, got a few pet peeves here but I will do my best to reign them in. One, Charlie Nash was in Guile's Special Forces Air Force and not some smarmy jackass in Don Johnson's hand me downs. Two, while the late Raul Julia was decked out as Bison in the unfortunate 1994 Street Fighter character jumble, I have to say Neal McDonough brings a morbid and dark villain to the table. I was pleasantly surprised with his representation. Three, the bloody narration throughout this movie felt like a voyage of discovery in the sense of a lost girl growing up and yeah she is a concert pianist and privileged child now turned warrior which is a huge separation from the Interpol tough as nails cop of the games. Honestly if you remove the Street Fighter elements from this movie, it is actually enjoyable.
Bring it on, Clark Kent! |
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