SG-1 Revisited: Space Race

Day 4 is upon us so let us embrace it for SG-1 Revisited as Carter to the SGC to speak with the alien Warrick from Forsaken asks for her help to win a race with the promise of access to an ion drive reactor. Warrick explains this race is for a contract for a large corporation. With the aid of Carter and his vessel Sebrus into the race. We are at Season 7 Episode 8. This is Space Race.

Hmm I see, you too like leathers.

With the race known as the Loop of Kon Garat hosted by the Tech Con Group. The race happens once a year as multiple people entered this for the chance at this contract. Carter brings a Naquadah generator as a major power supply to help with the race. Warrick (Alex Zahara of Riverworld, Gunless, Dead Rising 2, Dead Rising 2: Case West, Earth's Final Hours, Dead Rising 2: Off the Record, The House and Inhumans) offers Carter the chance to fly with him to monitor the generator and see how the ship performs. The creator of the Sebrus and Warrick's little brother Eamon (G.Patrick Currie of Cabin by the Lake, Cold Squad, Valentine, Dark Water, Stargate SG-1 and Percy Jack & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief) is pinning all their hopes and credits on Warrick's superior piloting skills.

This race is brought to you by Sparky Cola. A zap in a can.

The commentators explain each leg of the course and it feels like the Indie 500 or the Grand Prix in Monaco. Meanwhile Daniel, Teal'c and O'Neill are at the capital of the Hebridan/Serrakin representatives. Both species joined together to throw the Goa'uld off their world and managed to prosper and develop. Both species seem to have their collective attributions to their society but there has been a bit of tension between the cultures i.e. Bigotry, slights and in general strain in the society they have both spent so many lives and blood to rebuild.

The competition is fierce as beloved and expected to win is Hebridan pilot Muirios (Benjamin Ayres of Fantastic 4: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Good Luck Chuck, Dan for Mayor, Saving Hope and American Riot) and great outlaw Golon Jarlath (Scott MacDonald of Red Faction II, The Lyon's Den, Straight Into Darkness, Star Trek: Enterprise, The West Wing and Carnivale) and young, rising up and comer Lael Montrose (Lindsay Maxwell of Stargate SG-1, Deep Evil, Dante's Cove, The Butterfly Effects 2, Decoys 2: Alien Seduction, Lost Boys: The Tribe and Hair of the Sasquatch) as the race is on, the Sebrus gets damaged by sun's coronasphere that disrupted their shields due to sabotage. Eamon and Teal'c noticed a diagnostic showing power diverted from the ship.

Eamon and Teal'c find out that Eamon's supervisor Del Tynan had accessed their personal computer. To find more evidence he and Teal'c go to Tech Con and as they look into Tynan's computer and find almost every ship in the race has been tampered with except Muirios's ship. Captured by Tynan, he tells Teal'C and Eamon that the Serrakin are destroying the human race by mix marrying and crossbreeding so he will make sure that the winner of the race will be a pure blood human to begin the first step toppling the Serrakin.

Can SG-1 can get to the bottom of this conspiracy? Will Teal'c and Eamon be blasted to atoms??

Ah where the rubber meets the road...or not really.

SG-1 Revisited: Fair Game

Day 3 of SG-1 Revisited starts off with a large gambit, a gambit for the planet and all the lives of the Earth. Sounds dangerous? Well how about not even being a big kid to speak at the table and just being the host. Yeah that could suck but when you lack a fleet of starships to do battle with your opponents it is understandable. Back to Season Three, Episode 3 for a bizarre chain of events to unfold. This is Fair Game.

Do you mind? I am on the throne.

Back in Cheyenne Mountain via Stargate Command, U.S. Secretary of Defense, Arthur Simms. Visits and gives a speech on behalf of the work they do defending not merely the country and its way of life but putting their lives on the line to defend our very planet. Applause all around as General Hammond tells all attending to be at attention in order to honor Captain Carter's promotion to Major. Colonel O' Neill removes Carter's...Captain insignia (You pervs, behave!) and replaces them with those of a Major before Hammond and O' Neill salute her. Jack of course is required to make a speech and he is never really good at the stirring speeches that don't involve kicking ass and taking names but he musters up his courage in front of crowds and then...is beamed out of the SGC and on to Thor's ship.

I sat on a tack!

Supreme Commander Thor of the Asgardian Empire (voiced by Michael Shanks) tells Jack of an impending conference the Goa'uld System Lords will parlay into rather than destroy Earth for their meddling in their territories. So Thor has offered Earth a membership to the Asgardian Protected Planets Treaty so the System Lords do not wish to face the Asgardian Fleet. Thor ports his way to the SGC and informs Hammond of the treaty terms that as Earth is the planet in question up for strike that it is only fair that the negotiations take place here. They will set the negotiations at SGC and O'Neill will represent all of Earth, per the Asgardians' wishes. of which he feels Daniel would be better suited doing but the Asgards think otherwise as he was the leader taking his teams into dangerous situations and coming out on top in spite of being a technologically inferior race.

Doctor Jackson proceeds give the historical lowdown on what Earth knows of legends and myths of the System Lords Cronus (Ron Halder of Antitrust, Stargate SG-1, Spider-Man Unlimited, Mobile Suit Gundam Seed, X-Men: Evolution, Kong: The Animated Series and Death Note) Yu-huang Shang Ti (Vince Crestejo of Level 9, Dark Angel, Cold Squad, Christmas Rush, Stargate SG-1 and Stargate: Continuum)said to have been the Dragon or one of China's greatest emperors and lastly the Indian god of death and destruction Nirrti (Jacqueline Samuda of Wolf Lake, Stargate SG-1, See Grace Fly, Wilder Days, Sub Zero and A Girl Like Me: The Gwen Araujo Story). All in all, a swell bunch to be at your back door. Will Thor be able to deal with the System Lords? Can Jack not say something that will get the planet blown to bits?

A few facts of this episode now.

This was deemed an exercise in using folks that had never before appeared on camera. Jacqueline Samuda was a story editor for the show and given a major role as a Systems Lord? The same can be said of Vince Crestejo who at best was a stuntman and double for more than a few lesser characters on SG-1 and now made also a Systems Lord. And the gambit paid off well. Just goes to show you, you can never predict who will make a good actor or not.

Jack, did you float an air biscuit?

SG-1 Revisited: Prodigy

Welcome back for Day 2 of SG-1 Revisited. We are still in Season 4 of SG-1 and I always found this particular episode represented the past and the future of Stargate Command better than most of them. Imagine a lecture on wormholes being delivered by Major Carter and one of her equations was wrong. A brilliant but ill-tempered as well as ill-mannered young cadet points out this flaw and Carter sees potential in this girl if she could only play by the same rules as everyone else. This is Prodigy.

I am soooo bored.

Air Force Cadet Jennifer Hailey (Elisabeth Rosen of My Mother's Ghost, Sanctuary, Bless the Child, House of the Dead, Lucky Stars and Comforting Skin) would be a great asset to the SGC and Carter needs her to see in spite of being gifted she needs to go through the training as everyone else in order to rank up and probably not break the nose of any upper-classmates again. Colonel O'Neill and Teal'c are off-world at a research facility on a moon M4C-862 with a gathering of scientists that have deemed O' Neill and Teal'c as an unnecessary venture on Stargate Command's thinking and they will simply just get underfoot. O'Neill and Teal'c proceed to do sweeps around the base to ensure safety.

Back Earthside, Carter finds out that most of the negative attitude that stems from Hailey is due to boredom and frustration with the course she is taking. Constantly being compared to Carter regardless how her high scores in every class she attends. To sever the chip on Hailey's shoulder, Carter gets permission to give Hailey a tour of the SGC but General Hammond feels otherwise as he does not feel she is officer material. Carter goes to bat for Hailey stating if she glimpses her potential future with the SGC that she will buckle down and excel as a officer and make Hammond proud.

These titles are a bit too close to my groin.

Back at the moon, Dr. Thompson (Hrothgar Mathews of Cold Squad, The Core, Tom Stone, The Wild Guys and Cable Beach) discovers an alien life form comprised of energy phases through solid matter and discharges energy. Thompson tells the other scientists that they need to capture one for the betterment of all mankind!!! Yeah that old chestnut never comes to bite us in the ass.

Both Dr. Lee (Bill Dow of The X-Files, Cold Squad, Stargate SG-1, Pasadena, Da Vinci's Inquest, Kyle XY and Stargate: Alantis) and O'Neill think this is a bad idea as the makeshift container is breached by the lifeform zapping Thompson over and over and over again until he is a microwaved meal. Ick.

Unaware of what is happening on M4C-862, Carter and Hailey go for a visit to be right dab smack into a crisis when Carter goes into action to assist O'Neill, Teal'c and the surviving scientists. Hailey and Carter are butting heads on who hypothesized the most likely scenario while lives are in the balance. Will SG-1 be able to remove the scientists off the moon? Is M4C-862 deemed less than safe for humanity?

A few points on the episode now.

This marks the first appearance of Bill Dow of X-Files as Dr. Bill Lee. As he is barely is able to keep from being killed he ends up stay for the rest of the series, the spin-offs and even the movies. Pretty snazzy, sir.

Guest star Michael E. Ryan is the actual The Chief of Staff of the United States Air Force which Richard Dean Anderson gets to ask, "Do you really have Air Force Colonels who act the way I do? General Ryan simply replied, "Yes and worse!" General Ryan served until retirement in 2001.

No, let's not shoot it.

SG-1 Revisited: Window of Opportunity

Howdy folks and welcome to Stargate SG-1 Revisited for Day 1. Our episode revolves around a geomagnetic storm caused by solar wind shock wave or a magnetic field with the Earth's magnetic field creating a temporal loop. Can the SG-1 team get back on track? This is Window of Opportunity.

Why Fruit Loops??

On a mission on, SG-1 works with an alien archaeologist Malikai (Robin Mossley of The Sports Pages, Elf, Two for the Money, Connors' War, Painkiller Jane and R.L. Stine's The Haunting Hour) and a series of ruins and a large altar device left by the Ancients and is working with Daniel Jackson to study the ruins and the device as well. Carter is measuring the solar radiation when the stargate opens up from the planet and Earth while a beam emits from the device and then... O'Neill is in the mess hall with Daniel being poignant and passionate but Jack was spacing off and eating.

They proceed to General Hammond are set to go to planet P4X-639 and both O'Neill and Teal'c claim to have previous knowledge of the mission. Dr. Fraiser does a check-up on both fellows and all is well. Before the Scooby gang can go to their mission an unscheduled off-world activation happens and... Jack is back to his breakfast and Daniel is waiting for Jack's response... Yes we looped again and again.

No, I do not want a rectal thermometer!

Daniel suggests that Jack and Teal'c loop again they need to go with him to his lab and help him translate it. After what clearly was a few weeks they are making headway but both Jack and Teal'c have lost track of the days. At some point it looks like madness is about to ensue but the guys take a few loops off. Get some games in, take a few pottery lessons, some juggling and even a few golf swings.

So with shenanigans galore plus the ongoing concern of will they ever get out of the loop, stop Malikai from activating it and God only knows how much damage this device is causing around the universe linked to an existing wormhole. What Daniel deciphers with Jack and Teal'cs help they find out the device in question is actually supposed to be a time machine... that is not a blue box or a DeLorean. Shame shame Ancients. Always go for something with a little style. According to the translation, the device was made and tested but found it could not prevent the outgoing plague it was meant to be overted so they gave up on it. Malikai insists he is close to perfecting it but there is a tiresome and exhausted expression on his face that says even he doesn't believe in his work anymore.

Will the SG-1 crew be able to stop Malikai? Are they doomed to rinse, lather and repeat? Is there no end to Jake's horrible jokes??

Some points of trivia now.

The fruit loops on Jack's spoon were glued in place to ensure continuity between time loops, hence not eating that spoonful of cereal. At almost every sci-fi and/or Stargate convention, Christopher Judge (Teal'c) claims that he hit the golf ball through the Stargate, Richard Dean Anderson could not, even after multiple takes and attempts. Finally a CGI ball was made to complete the scene.

This episode deals in good humor and dark seriousness. It is light and pithy one minute and grounded in drama the next and makes for what most SG fans as a great episode to start people on the series as it is one of the best episodes and I have to concur.

Still not sure why they keep calling me "Pretty Boy".

SG-1 Revisited

Welcome back to the week, folks. It has been a bit crazy with the whole Indiegogo campaign NOT really taking off and I am almost certain unless within the next 13 hours it will change that the funds we have earned will be refunded. Yippee... But enough grumbling about that and we focus on the week in question which consists of those planetary explorers, defenders and instigators from Stargate Command. That's right, SG-1. None have known more physical and mental pain than these folks. The Doctor hasn't seen that much torment...well okay probably he has but he'd rather not talk about it so just go peek in his diary.

A woman and a black guy???  What the Sam scratch is goin' on?

For the next few days we will find some fan favorite episodes, go through the Chappa'ai and experience more deafening explosions outside of some popular Trekkie shows. Over the years of interacting with SG-1 and Atlantis fans shows me there is no one answer to what episode is more popular then the other. For some, it is the guest star. For others it is the writing and every so often it is a body swap episode or alternative Earth Mirror Mirror effect.

With the need to scavenge the universe for advanced technology to appease the committees that fund the Stargate Command, along with gaining allies in the struggles against superior firepower, interstellar ships and older races that conquer and enslave lesser developed planets, the SG teams constantly have to weigh the pros and cons of helping others, get involved with their day-to-day events and even understand the cultures, social and political concerns. 

The safety word is "Apples"

I know, soooo wordy. Let's get to the real reason we are here. What do you deem is one of the best SG-1 episodes and why. I have compiled a handful of suggestions but feel free to write me back and let me know what episode moved you to laughter, tears or even both.

This is SG-1 Revisited Week.

Zombie Stew: The Bone Yard

Welcome one and all to another helping of Zombie Stew. Day 4 and I am not certain I can truly reference this as a zombie film when the film insinuates the creatures are ghouls but hell Romero tried to call his zombies ghouls as well. What do you get when you pair two mildly capable cops an overweight psychic and a few coroners? No, you do not make a flesh golem Voltron capable of seeing the dead and dispensing the law. You get the comedy/horror dealing with decent practical effects a monstrous dog beast and Phyllis Diller as you have never seen her before. This is The Boneyard.

A door?  Damn.  How do these things work again?

Our writer/director James Cummins (The Boneyard, Dark:30 and Harbinger)cut his teeth in film doing creature design and sculpting for mostly sci-fi and horror films and followed the call of writing and directing.

With the police stumped after a series of unprecedented homicides, Detective Callum (Ed Nelson of A Bucket of Blood, Peyton Place, Police Academy 3: Back in Training, Who Am I? And Runaway Jury) and doofus Detective Mullin (James Eustermann of Spaced Invaders, The Boneyard, Cast a Deadly Spell, Woody Burns...a Life and Words Unspoken) seek any assistance to figuring out this grusome series of murders even coaxing a portly, retired psychic Alley Oates (Deborah Rose of Fugitive Lovers, American Drive-In, Troop Beverly Hills, Ski Patrol and The Boneyard) to help find this mass murderer. Their first clue is no exposition reports on the radio about homicidal loonies escaping an asylum and stealing an ax or machete. Tough luck fellas, time to do some real legwork.

NBC's Fall Listing: My Three CHUDS.

With a taped interrogation of mortician Chen (Robert Yun Ju Ahn of The Boneyard) our dutiful detective and flailing physic attempting to decipher what the bloody hell is going on, more deaths are occurring and bodies are be shipped in to the coroner's office. Enter our wacky medical examiners Miss Poopinplatz and yes that is her actual character name and Mr. Shepard.

Poopinplatz (Phyllis Diller of The Red Skelton Hour, Love, American Style, The Sunshine Boys, Uncle Croc's Block, The Nutcracker Prince, Blossom, Animaniacs, Robot Chicken and Everything's Jake) is a crotchety older woman without her iconic wig and only has love for her darling poodle Floofsoms and... yeah that is actually about it. Her colleague Shepard a.k.a. Mr. Roper (Norman Fell of The End, Getting There, Three's Company, Dan August: The Jealousy Factor, Dan August: Once Is Never Enough, Dan August: Murder, My Friend, The Ropers and Beach House) with a pony tail???

Callum arrives with Oates and bumbling rookie Mullin in time for the craziness ensuing as the bodies re-animate and start attacking the living. The ghouls in question are actually possessed bodies by demons known as Kyonshi...really close to Kashi isn't it? Given how some of those cereals are WAY TOO fiber based I would rather the demons named Kashi to give me more incentive to bodily dismember them. So the fiber demons are tearing ass around the morgue attacking both the staff, cops and psychic (of which she did see that coming) and let's be fair, the practical effects for the ghouls is actually really good. Will our dwindling party survive the onslaught of undead kids, men and women alike? Will this shake them to the core and they will have to stop over-acting like Jeremy Irons in Dungeons and Dragons? And what of my spinach puffs in the oven as I write this?

Bit of trivia on the movie now.

Special effects were handled by Jim Henson alumni Tim Hawkins (The Jim Henson Hour, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: Secret of the Ooze, The Boneyard and Muppets from Space) dealing with animatronic creature costumes and zombie effects.

Shot in a standard 35mm Spherical the film, lightning and general crew is professional in spite of the absurdity that is seen on screen. Our film was shot in five weeks with plenty of time left over to add an additional see of a wedding scene between Gordon and Dana that should have been the end of the flick but the scene was never added to the finished product.

Producers Richard F. Brophy (House, The Boneyard, Speak of the Devil, Dark:30 and Harbinger) and Phil Smoot (Alien Outlaw, Home of Angels, Above Suspicion, Night Class, Tara, The Gravedancers and Warbirds) talked about getting both Alice Cooper for not only the music but playing a part along with character actor veteran Clu Gulager for key roles but they declined.

Yeah the rock icon that starred in Monster Dog and Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare and the fellow that starred in Return of the Living Dead and all three of his son's Feast movies turned down The Bone Yard.

Bring your poo bags, FLUFFY GONNA CRAP DOUBLE TONIGHT!!

Zombie Stew: Cemetery Man

Howdy and welcome back to Zombie Stew for Day 3 of the madness. With a cemetery that is only watched by the gravedigger and the nightwatchman man there is more than enough activity to bring adventure and terror all in one sitting. With the risk of losing his job, the undead over running the living and in general, making his life hell, Francesco Dellamorte must handle these legion of flesh eaters with the assistance of his sidekick. This is Dellamore Dellamorte a.k.a. Cemetery Man.

Mmm nic stick!

Ever vigilant in the cemetery of Buffalora, a small village in the north of Italy seems to have a nasty penchant corpses rising out of their tombs so Dellamorte (Rupert Everett of Arthur the King, Duet for One, The Comfort of Strangers, Ready to Wear, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Shrek 2, Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Silk Stocking, Stardust and The Other Wife) has taken it upon himself as duties of nightwatchman man to deal with the undead and bury them again. Aiding him in his struggles of the nonliving is his mute sidekick Gnaghi (Francois Hadji-Lazaro of Cemetery Man, The City of Lost Children, Brotherhood of the Wolf and Dante 01) and live goes on dull as before...with roaming zombies. Some people seem to simply return after the seventh night of their death.

Well that will spoil the flesh eating.

Dellamorte is not exactly certain why this happens but he is simply just doing his job whether it is bashing brains in with a walloping shovel in the skull or simply putting a bullet in the head with homemade dum dum or hollow point bullets does the best. Dellamorte's only true friend is Marco (Anton Alexander of King David, EastEnders, Cemetery Man, Through the Eyes of Another, The Power of Three, The Novel and Romeo & Juliet) a clerk that explains how long the paperwork will take to file in order for Dellamorte to get an investigation going on why the cemetery is as it is. Easier to shoot them.

It's only a model.

At a funeral Dellamorte's heart skips a beat at the gorgeous young widow (Anna Falchi of Nel continente, L'affaire, The Dragon Ring, Celluloid, Paparazzi, Operazione Rosmarino, Bambini and Silent Night) of a rich and older man. Enchanted by her as spends every day replacing the flowers of her husband's grave they become interested in each other but will it take him away from his duties that he has sworn to do. Will the cemetery be closed down? Will Dellamorte ever have a life beyond the dead? Will Gnaghi ever overcome his shyness and have an astounding operatic singing voice?

A few points of interest on the film now.

All the zombies or Returners as Dellamorte calls them are practical effects and each and every one of them look unique and different. The characters and story hails from comic book writer/novelist Tiziano Sclavi (creator of Dylan Dog, Nero, Dellamore Dellamorte and Vittima degli eventi) and our director Michele Soavi (The Church, Stage Fright: Aquarius, The Goodbye Kiss, Political Target and Blood of the Losers) is protege of Dario Argento so you know his mind was warped at an early age.

With the copious amount of crane shots, POV, handheld and anamorphic lens coupled with its bizarre and wonderfully written content, I do recommend this for a different take on the zombie lore. Be advised, parental units there is a fair degree of nudity and sexual content as well so may want the little ones to vacate. 

Sheesh even the dead wanna see this girl nude.