Favorite SG-1 Episodes: Disclosure

And we are back. Sorry for the delay but that audio review that is now up on Youtube and Vidme took me almost two days to cut to my liking and I am still not 100% liking it. So on with the episode. Now this particular tale is not as exciting from an explosive action jam-packed power hour that you are used to. No new civilizations to beheld buuuut... it holds the future of the Stargate program in United States Air Force in the hands of many. This is SG-1 Season 6 Episode 17: Disclosure.

Sorry, sometimes the Borsch acts up.

A summit is held and foreign political representatives of the planet have been called in. For more than 6 years Cheyenne Mountain has been sending SGC teams to other worlds, finding new technology and making weapons to defend the planet against the Goa'uld but could easily being turned on their own enemies of the planet. Now many folks watching this episode have mixed feelings. You telling our rivals about all this sweet tech the military has been building? Why did it take so long to tell this story to the rest of the world? When will the SGC teams be revealed to the public?

General Hammond is trying to give vital intelligence on the Goa'uld's war capabilities, troops, ships that travel on interstellar levels and the weapons they possess when Senator Kinsey comes in with his hypocrisy for firebrand and God fearing, stating the SGC teams are incompetent, reckless and will one day have the Goa'ulds at our throats. He is counting on the representatives of the world to rally behind a civilian over-site committee to oversee all Stargate use, what trips to be taken and what material goods can come of this travel.  Again he sees overhead and gains rather than the allies and the people. Y'know, bad politician.

Gate bomb away!!!

With the ambassadors reluctance to accept that oblivion is on the rise, the collective heads of foreign relations are outraged as Senator Kinsey lays out some of SGC's dirty laundry. The fact of the foothold situation with an alien species incorporating a shape-shifting device allowing them to take over command for a short while, connecting the Stargate to a black hole nearly swallowing the whole planet up and diverting a planet killer asteroid barely in the nick of time.

His follow-up compromise is to have the NID (National Intelligence Department), a civilian committee to head up Stargate operations. These are also the same people that stole from the Asgard, threatened Hammond's granddaughters, almost killed a world removing its weather control device and frankly are a bunch of ex-military, ex-CIA dinks. Their objective is vast new technology at any cost including pissing off SGC's already established allies.

No France, we cannot immediately surrender. This guy.

Hammond endures about the whole episode of this when he decides he won't play fair either. Time for a winning hand and calls an ally in. You folks love the little guy and you know it. Of the Asgard fleet, Supreme Commander Thor appears and explains why the SGC teams need to continue, the alliance they have forged and how they would take any change as less than wise solution.

Now I know more than a handful of people that do not like this episode because it relies on a lot of stock footage of the previous episodes to explain the severity of the threat. Personally I thought this episode is vastly important to the series as the cat is out of the bag and all that is the SGC is in jeopardy if this summit goes south. Now anyone aware of nuclear deterrent summits, you know another will follow directly after this one has been reached to the goals intended or outright failed. Peace talks will continue and agreements will be done on table and everything under the table will still be in effect. They spy on us, we spy on them and so on.

Political struggle and the possession of the gate should have happened sooner but that is really at the end of the day in the hands of the creators and writers. I still felt there should have been more outrage and disgruntlement.

Extreme Wormholin'!!!

Favorite SG Episodes: The Tok'ra Part 2

And we are back ladies and germs for Part 2 of the exciting conclusion of the Tok'ra. When we last left our SG-1 and SG-11 teams, the threat of a traitor giving away the Tok'ras' position had happened, Sam and her father (General not Colonel) Jacob had made it to the caves so he and Selmak may possibly blend. What in the nine Hells can top all of that??! This is SG-1 Season 2 The Tok'ra Part 2.

Bow down before Sarah Douglas!!!

With O' Neill and Carter back with her father Jacob in tow, the planet is being evacuated. The Tok'ra are prepping to trash their underground tunnels, ring up to their hidden ships or head for the Stargate toot sweet. Mass chaos ensuing, O'Neil, Jackson, Teal'C and SG-11 assist in evacuations and even prep for cover fire and assault on the impending Goa'uld forces on their way for their standard ground assault. Not to bash the System Lords but have they ever considered just orbital bombardment? I mean soften the planet's populations and defense and then send in the ground troops. Just a thought.

During this clusterf**k of an mission, the SG teams hold under pressure. No wonder there of course. SG-1 is Air Force Spec Ops, a warrior more than a 100 years fighting experience and a brave paramilitary trained civilian/archeologist. SG-11 is Marine Recon so again odds are bad asses will prevail.

Sorry I beefed.

Selmak and Jacob chat through the former host and find each other to be decent folk. Selmak is smart and a capable being with vast knowledge but the host warns him that all memories, good and bad will be shared. Failures, horrors but also joy and accomplishments. Ultimately it is up to the general if he wants to do this blending. Plus the chemo and Stargate jaunt didn't help him feel any better.

O' Neill recognized the long range visual communications orb that is Goa'uld tech and slightly confused why one of the Tok'ra would use it. Given it's all one network and no real way to mask the signal. Confirming with Teal'c and later Sarah Douglas er um I mean Yosuuf/Garshaw of Belote that they have a Benedict Arnold amongst them, she and a detachment of men swoop into action weapons at the ready. Guess they don't waste time. With that, the traitor's host claims his symbiote was murdered and he had to obey the Goa'uld...and then chucks himself into the disintegrating tunnel as his own punishment. Well saves on time for a trial or vengeance but still not really helping the cause there.

Your dad beefed, Sam.

With the Goa'uld hot on their heels the SG teams and the Tok'ra all seems hopeless and only a typical last minute save can bring our collective groups out of the fire.

Can the Tok'ra be trusted?? Will Jacob/Selmak be safe?? What of Chad's love for Susie?

Coming back to these episodes it is easy to forget this goes back as far as 1997 and of course all happened because of Roland Emmerich's 1994 Stargate movie. For that further notion it has been ten years later since the last Stargate episode and it really doesn't feel like it.

This was the first real introduction to showing that Earth was not alone in this fight, that allies were possible and the humans might stand a decent chance against the impeding enemies.

Guess Jacob beefed again.

The Case of Financial Woe Chapter 2

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Favorite SG Episodes: The Tok'ra Part 1

Well it has been a while for this subject matter so no time like the present, eh? Welcome back to the blog and I thought I would work in a few Stargate SG-1 episodes. Among this week are some of my favorites so I thought I would share them with you all, my readers. If Stargate is not your cup of tea, well you will be disappointed with the week and I won't hold it against you. This is Stargate SG-1 Season 2: The Tok'ra Part 1

So I need to tinkle.

Yup a two-parter. You don't see many of those outside of science fiction or sci-fi fantasy.

After experiencing random memories from the deceased Jolinar, Carter has insight to tunnels created by the Tok'ra (an offshoot of the Gou'ald that share a true symbiotic relationship with their host), their guerilla warfare and tactical awareness. So much so, that SG-1 has a go to visit the coordinates of the nearby desert planet (I was unaware Vancouver had desert and bedrock) and before they can even fan out and do some recon, the team is surrounded by at least 8 would-be assailants with Jaffa sticks and Zat guns. Carter recognizes Martuf as someone Jolinar held in high regards and the ambush party reveal themselves to be members of the Tok'ra. Everyone manages to unclench and lower weapons and thank God because O' Neill was in a crouched position and that couldn't have been good for the knees.

Kind of reminds me of Planet Hell Star Trek set.

Invited to inner tunnels and sanctum, The Tok'ra proceed to evaluate the SG team confused as why a Jaffa is on their side and why Carter was once blended with Jolinar. Meanwhile Carter's father Jacob, decorated Air Force Colonel is dying of cancer. Yup wouldn't be a good drama without cancer. He knows that Sam is doing important work in Cheyenne Mountain but it is red taped classified and he knows she is not simply working on a satellite telemetry. When last they spoke he had pulled some strings to get her cleared for NASA and she blushed slightly and had to turn it down because of the importance of her work. Jacob and General Hammond go back quite awhile and he wants to know what Sam is really doing.

Meanwhile the Tok'ra are hard pressing the team for information and grating on O' Neill's nerves. This of course will lead him into a complex negotiations and diplomatic maneuvering. Oh wait, this is O' Neill. Yeah he'll get grumpy and snap at them like some irritable turtle. The Tok'ra explain that the human hosts and they exist together in one body. The hosts even speak for themselves trying to assure the SG team that they enjoy their blended lives, shared knowledge and overall experiencing one another in what anyone could viewing as two beings knowing each other completely and without shame or judgement.

Selmak their elder is dying with its host, the Tok'ra asks if any of the SG team wish to blend with Selmak to save her but of course the team passes that and explain they wish to add to each others strength and form an alliance. The Tok'ra are cagey, paranoid and with good reason. Their mere existence is an affront to the Goa'uld as much as they to them and they have only stayed alive through covert attacks and tactical planning. The team is being held in the tunnels until the Tok'ra can decide whether or not they can be trusted.

Ahhh Hell Dimension!!

With Sam millions of light years away, she is unaware her father is dying. Hey how do we ratchet up that drama? How about a Tok'ra acting shifty? Maybe even possessing one of those long range Goa'uld communications orbs?

Will the alliance be over before it begins?? Can the Gou'ald find the Tok'ra before they can escape?? Will O' Neill be insufferable??

As this episode leads out on a cliff hanger I guess you will have to wait until tomorrow for the continuation. Directed by Brad Turner (Homeland, Hawaii Five-0, 24, Alacatraz, Transporter, The Vampire Diaries, Psych, Stalker, Legends, Daredevil, Falling Skies and Wayward Pines) a seasoned TV director and producer brings his "A" game to all his work and it truly speaks for itself. This episode brings not only a turning point for the SG teams but the beginning of a much larger universe and species for humans to interact with.

Sitting on this rock is gonna be hell on my roids.

Rotten Reelz Reviews Audio Review #30: Deep Red

B&W Horror: House on Haunted Hill

Welcome back my good and true readers. As we delve into the terrors of the B&W Horror with the prince of darkness himself. Vincent Price. With the potential for murder, mayhem and most long winded malarkey involving dull dialogue and no ability to move ones arms, how could you not be on the edge of your chair? Well if you are, scoot back and relax. This madness hails from 1958. This is House on Haunted Hill.

They're always after me Lucky Charms.

If you're an eccentric millionaire with great big gobs of money, what do you for a good party? Of course you would give folks the chance to winning the amount of ten thousand dollars if they can make it through the night to a haunted house teeming with pesky poltergeists. But who do you invite? Friends and family? Clearly not. How about a smattering of employees, a columnist, a test pilot and maybe even a shrink? How else can you and your wife be entertained but a gathering almost total strangers.

I will out creep you, John Carradine!  I swear this!

Fredrick Loren (Vincent Price of House of Wax, The Fly, Last Man on Earth, House of Usher, Dead Heat, Catchfire The Heart of Justice and Edward Scissorhands) and his stunning new wife Annabelle (Carol Ohmart of The Scarlet Hour, House on Haunted Hill, Spider Baby, Wild Youth, The F.B.I., Barnaby Jones, Mannix, Caxabu and Branded) are having a potty according to the shrink who cannot pronounce an r, Dr. Trent (Alan Marshal of The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes, After the Thin Man, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Bourbon Street, Day of the Outlaw, Sugarfoot, M. Squad and Surfside 6) with free flowing liquor, loaded firearms and a gaggle of ghouls said to roam the house. Hope that is iron based rounds and not lead then.

Test pilot Lance (Richard Long of Stranger, House on Haunted Hill, The Big Valley, The Girl Who Came Gift Wrapped, Love, American Style, Nanny and the Professor, The Twilight Zone and 77 Sunset Strip) is a martini away from bad touch and is such a klutz I cannot envision the Air Force entrusting this goober with a 15 million dollar aircraft.

Then I feed the entrails to my dark lord and master. More Scotch?

With odd effects and Elisha Cook Jr acting like a demented, drunkard of the Lollypop Guild telling the party goers (potty) of all the horrors of murder, suicide and madness. This murder mystery is only lacking some pesky kids and a yammering dog. Cook plays Watson Pritchard, a wide eyed leprechaun who is convinced the whole house is cursed with the deaths of the previous owners including his brother that has power come for them all.

In spite of this story being a bit on the dull side, the cinematography is impressive, the cast is fairly enjoyable and it is ripe for riffing (movie mockery) if that is something folks love to spout jokes and comments at a flick.

Keep in mind, Rifftrax beat you guys and gals to the professional punch but no reason you shouldn't have some fun with this cinematic goofiness.

Spanish Colonial Outta Control.

B&W Horror: Carnival of Souls

Hey folks. Well it was bound to happen that eventually if it is in your movie collection long enough, I am going to make fun of it. I mean review it. Somehow today's B&W film may have been deemed spine-tingling horror to the 1962 audience but when you think how many exploitation flicks were being made, probably not. Because when I think pants wetting terror I automatically think the name Herk Harvey (Operation Grass Killer, Your Junior High Days, Dance, Little Children, Why Study Science?, Why Study Industrial Arts?). Shuddering stuff those PSA films. Hell I openly riffed Your Junior High Days via Rotten Riffs. Bone chilling notions.

Howabout the story of an organ player making her way to the splendor of Utah after a near tragic car crash? Intrigued yet? Don't worry. You won't be...ever. This is Carnival of Souls.

Ma'am, can I interest you in a copy of the Watch Tower?

For all the mockery this movie has received...well here's some more. Young Mary (Candace Hilligoss of Carnival of Souls, The Curse of the Living Corpse, Naked City, South of Hell Mountain and Quincy M.E.) endures a painstakingly long ass drive to Utah. SERIOUSLY! It was almost 8 to 15 minutes this drive for footage. With the exception of the occasional mutant hell beast from the Never Never trying to bum rides in her car, it was damn squirrelly.

We finally get to her boarding house where Mrs. Thomas (Frances Feist of A Life to Save, The Show-Off, George Tackles the Land, Speech: Using Your Voice and Carnival of Souls) proceed to talk her ear off about sandwich makings, how to run the bath tub, the plumbing, the heating, maybe how to bathe herself and possibly her bed turn down offers. Yeah she yammers for quite a bit. Worry not ladies. The screen sizzles with this hunk of beef just down the hall from Mary as main man John (Sidney Berger of Carnival of Souls and Carnival of Souls 1998) with his shifty nature and makes leering stares and slathering expressions. I don't think he was actually acting as so much as Herk just hired him to make lewd gestures and scratch himself in true construction worker fashion.

Resident sex offender reporting for duty!

The minister (Art Ellison of A Life to Save, The Perfect Crime, Carnival of Souls, Paper Moon, Shoot it Black, Shoot it Blue, and Mary White) has of course introduced Mary to his organ.. The church organ! Apologies. More pasty white soundless men appear around Mary and normally I would be concerned but it is Utah and the populous is really made up of some of the whitest people you will encounter. She is also clearly a student of Leonard Nimoy as she manages an inquisitive eye brow raising all the while looking befuddled.

The film gives you the overall vibe that Mary is alone, isolated and lacking any form of human interaction aside from pleasantries and greetings. With soggy chalk white specters as her only source of male interest you do get the idea perhaps Mary was never meant to survive her car crash.

Which one of us farted?

Great gobs of organ music to make a bizarre standing. 82 minutes of this story dragging on and on.

Perhaps the radio stations in Utah are nothing but organ enthusiasts.

Will the organ bring her solace? Will creepy opaque ghouls haunt her? Did she spy on her landlady's lemon drink?

This by the way is the only time I have ever heard a Foley flub. Her footsteps do not match up with her running in one scene and I just started laughing. Line and dubbing flubs I have seen and heard before but foot flub? That's new. Quick shout out to Mom. Yes landlady's term sandwich makings sounded dumber than my term sandwich fixings.

With a modest budget of maybe $10,000 but of course IMDB estimates it at $30,000 this low budget film was attempting more of an Outer Limits/Twilight Zone/Night Gallery vision without being nearly as eerie and clever. The cinematography does capture a lot of the dark atmosphere but again so much padding takes away from it. Best to watch this as it was meant to be. With Rifftrax's Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett mocking it as veteran riffers.

Rotten Reelz Reviews Audio Review #29: Puppet Master

Rotten Reelz Reviews Audio Review# 28: Subspecies

Random Reels: Alien vs Predator

Hey folks I am back again. Sorry for the delay but the Subspecies Audio Review took almost two days to cut, edit and complete. That being said we are doing some Random Reels today and I thought I would describe a film that was neither disappointing or amazing but really lackluster as a whole. A film combining two franchises that should have accelerated to the echelons of cinema and not in the bottom of the Best Buy five dollar barrel. This is Alien Vs Predator.

His name is Tusky.

This particular film had high hopes from anyone playing the arcade game of Aliens vs Predator based on a Dark Horse title started in 1993 which storyline has nothing to do with humanity and it is just Aliens and Predators going to town, along with Activison releasing a Super Nintendo version of the arcade game. With action figures, video games in development, these two terrifying creatures of space were held to a standard as high as the Universal movie monsters of yesteryear. So Fox green-lights a film treatment that was in development hell. Deciding if it should be a new Alien movie, will Ridley Scott or James Cameron come back for it, can they get Sigourney Weaver and/or Michael Behn back and so on. So how did this concept disappoint so many? Well...okay I'll tell you as best I can.

Looks like a remodeled Shang Sun temple.

Director/writer Paul W.S. Anderson (Mortal Kombat, Event Horizon, Soldier, The Sight, Resident Evil, Resident Evil: Apocalypse, Resident Evil: Extinction, Death Race,Death Race 2 and Pompeii) tells a tale involving humanity, the xenomorphs (Aliens) and the hunters (Predators) and an ancient pyramid deep in the frozen wastes of Antarctica. Recorded by Weyland Industries satellite, a huge energy beam strikes the frozen region from the sky. For what purpose? No one can say. Owner of said satelite and growing corporation, Charles Bishop Weyland (Lance Henriksen of The Terminator, Aliens, Alien 3, Pumpkinhead, Powder, Millennium, X-Files, Man's Best Friend, Madhouse, Hellraiser: Hellworld and Screamers: The Hunting) has video confirmation of something, a huge structure buried miles under the ice and wants to take an expedition to discover what it is.  Well being an Anderson movie you know this cast will consist of expendable one-dimensional characters who will tell the audience in clunky dialogue who they are and why they are so vital to the team. Anderson favorites include the very talented Colin Salmon, Tommy Flanagan and Liz May Brice. Yeah they show up in more than a few of these flicks and their roles as body count NEVER EVER changes.

Make two Blade sequels without me? What were they thinking?

To lead this dangerous trek we need a bad ass and there she is. Alexa Woods (Sanaa Lathan of Blade, Out of Time, Nip/Tuck, Powder Blue, Something New, Wonderful World, Tilda, Contagion, Boss and Shots Fired), mountaineer, trained medic and overall bad ass. Weyland describes what they will be facing and she puts her foot down worried that the expedition will be over before it begins. Some of these cats don't look cardio ready enough but Weyland will go forward with or without her help. So off into the tundra they go.

Meanwhile miles above the Earth, a landing party comprised of three predators proceed past this forgotten oil refinery/whaling town and head below the ice to find...a big honking pyramid somehow almost perfectly preserved from even these harsh climate changes. Let's be clear. This stonework is completely intact after years of no direct contact with the existing weather patterns. Our team of expendable (Not in the Stallone and Statham way) archeologists want the audience to believe it is an Aztec temple and the hieroglyphs speak of a hunting ground as a rite of passage to being full hunters. An Aztec temple in the Antarctic, possibly Cambodian. Boy, that will be a big shock for Mexico won't it? Oh and before we get into the sweet, sweet action this SciFi/Horror movie is rated PG-13. Conclusion on that? More young butts in seats equals a viewing pleasure.

Action scene wise, this is visually awesome. Watching two of the nastiest critters going at it in full death match looks amazing. You can hear every growl, snarl, bones cracking, masonry being shattered. Awesome sauce.

The downside is the dialogue is typical of Anderson creations in that it has no depth, no time for character development and no one is particularly interesting at all. Exception our bad ass mountaineer, the rest could have been replaced with voice actors and CGI green screen characters. I couldn't remember a single character name attached aside from Weyland and Alex and I have a near perfect memory. Bottom line, the story is crap but the visuals are amazing. The characters are dull and unfinished but the FX, props and makeup are astounding. My advice? Hit mute, turn on close caption and watch it unfold.

Sadly, Kevin Peter Hall did not get to reprise his Predator role as he died in 1991. the animatronic Alien Queen was rigged with a motion control remote allowing her movements to be recorded digitally and saved for implementation for the film. 

Guess the queen is into BDSM??

Hey gang!  Sorry for the delay but the editing for this audio review took almost two days to get it where I wanted it.   Take a gander yourselves.  Audio Review# 28 Subspecies   I hope you all enjoy it.

Incognito Cinema Warriors XP: Werewolf in a Girl's Dormitory

Howdy doodly doo readers of the blog! Yeah I promise to try not to do an intro that goofy again. So we are back with the boy and bots of ICWXP as the lads partake in a snobby high end coffee sketch. Zany funsters that they are. No sooner does the monkey business end, Dr. Blackwood sends cam feed of him getting tazed and abducted by a hybrid of a hazmat/paramilitary team lead by a man in black. My heavens. Not sure why they had to go with the ball gag but I'm not judging.

Something got into Rick's hand and it went bad.

Our man in black introduces himself as Kincaid (Because Wesker would have been too on the nose) and tells them they have been experimented on by the Ludovico Corporation and it will be business as usual. Also Rick should give up thoughts of escape and kneel before Zod. With an annoying short in play and the main feature looming overhead, the fellas are a bit nervous. This is Werewolf in a Girl's Dormitory.

Our short, Ghost Rider (Thankfully not starring the ghost of Nicholas Cage's career past) give a deep, sinister look into bus safety from beyond the grave... Chilling, right? Frankly the film called out for more Cage references but I digress, the boys got through it, chins held high.

The Mighty Quinn teaches 7th grade English.

During the host segment the lad and droids decide how to get to Toshi station for some much needed power converters and... Wait, that's something else.   Reminiscing over Blackwood and his nutty experiments Topsy and Cylon proceed to have their own douchy paranormal investigators series. I think it's called Ghost Jackers.  I guess it creeps the dearly departed if you start strangling the bishop right in front of them as they manifest. It would disturb me.   Also the "school" seems to be some potentially depraved old man's standing on what an all-girl school would be or operate. With its high walls and iron gates I just assumed it was a Catholic college.  This film loves three things: Cuts in the film and dialogue, lamps and letters. They are the primary focus of the werewolf movie it would see.

You've got to hide me, Rick!

Got to see Luciano Pigozzi again. Who?! Character actor of such gems as: Pigs with P.38, Evil Eye, Return of the Saint, The Exterminators of the Year 3000, Strike Commando, Zombi 3, Strike Commando 2, Yor, the Hunter from the Futur and Robowar. He will need a lot of hemp before the day is through. For those of you brave enough to watch the flick he looks like a Peter Lorre clone in this flick. So what can we even say about this movie? Well first time I saw it was at 4 in the afternoon and while Rick and the bots were knocking riffs left and right and being very entertaining the pace of this flick lapsed me into a small coma, possibly it was just a nap. I'm serious, I had to sit up to watch this movie it is so poorly paced, it has next to no copy that doesn't look like a copy of Reservoir Dogs from a local Blockbuster and the obsession of lamps was eerie.

I have no idea why the bots just didn't run head on into the path of a transformer or electromagnet. Suppose Rick could have hung himself with his combat boot laces.

Favorite riffs: Must we fight in front of the Lhasa Apsos, CAN YOU HEAR ME THROUGH THE LAMP??!!! and of course, I'LL KILL YOU!!

Make no mistake, gentle readers, we start moving from the counter and explore more story in the series. A true turning point and setting the stage for Season 2. Remember to hit Cinema Warriors homesite for episodes, swag and extensive stats and bio.