Thursday, November 1, 2012

Big Tits Zombie...I know what you are thinking..

Hey all, back with YET another zombie film.  Maybe this one will have its own unique spin.  Instead of that tired lumbering zombie of Romero years, this will be mildly intelligent and sentient flesh eaters.  Doomed to roam a world where no one understands their plight, hopes and dreams.   So grab your clear heels, draw up your g-string and prepare of swirling and twirling.  This is Jugs &Ghouls…er…I mean Big Tits Zombie.

Spoilers dig strippers…it’s true…look it up.

Soft core pornographer/writer Takao Nakano (Sumo Vixen, Sexual Parasite and Hot Step Jump!) decided to branch out in his…particular genre of horror eroticism and delve into the realm of zombies.  Now you Nakano fans must be asking, “But Jake how will he achieve the proper exploitation of actresses and insure us nudity?”   Well as luck would have it he makes the girls fending off the legions of the undead, strippers.   Yeah breaking some new unfettered ground there let me tell you.  This manga (Japanese comic book for those of you not in the knowing) influenced film was based on Rei Mikamoto’s Kyonyu-Dragon.   Our story opens with a barely dressed stripper lightly dribbled with blood.  I think it must have been a pen cap full sprinkled on.   As she attempts to clean her ample cleavage off, three shambling ghouls appear with patented Walking Dead moans.  Another girl with a cowgirl outfit and chainsaw, Lena (Adult actress Sola Aoi) splits one down the middle in true Tokyo Gore Police fashion with blood sprinklers at the ready.  She proceeds to have technical difficulties but her friend got her second wind, proceeds to go sickhouse on the lot with a katana.   Joining back in the fray, Lena goes back to back with Ginko (Risa Kasumi of Tokyo Girls 2: Supervixens and Subete no onna ni uso ga aru)

A few technical critiques I have offhand.  The feel of the film is to give the implied Grindhouse standing.  Lower budget and grainy film stock to give it that patented 1960’s exploitation feel and overall it is decent but the combo of CGI blood splatter, squibbed gel blood packs as well as the more viscous sprays with a under cranked fast paced film may be a bit hard on the photophobic eyes.   Takano is really going for the live anime standing so that means absurd violence, twisting the laws of gravity and physics with a dash of what the hell.   Lucky me I got to endure the 3D version and yes we are talking old school red and blue glasses rather than your polarized version of current.  Migraine sufferers you may want to skip this film but of course the title didn’t shoo you away I guess you deserve your fate.
This is ridiculous violence, caricatures of working girls and an amusing narrative through this bloodbath.  Mindless hack and slash for all to enjoy and yes boys ample amounts of nudity so you are fully covered. So have at it folks.  I’m going to crack up a Doctor Who book.