And we back for the week again. I
might do a write-up on Saturday to give you at least 3 different
films but the audio review for Psycho II was a bit exhausting. I
have only done that one and Zombie Doom as far as capturing video so
bear with me when I tell you that 8 minutes of footage took almost
two hours to get just so. Moving right along I really wanted to
find a copy of Satan's Blood but I need to buy one instead. Ugh,
back burner you go. So with that bit of depressing news let's head
to a small European village instead where the inhabitants seem a bit
off, superstitious and fearful as we delve into The Vampires' Night
Orgy a.k.a. Orgy of the Vampires, Grave Desires and Vampire Night
Orgy.
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| First the spankings and then the oral sex!!! |
Yup we got an award winning concept as
who could pass up on any of these titles.
We open with a funeral in progress as
the coffin is lowered into the ground, it cracks open to reveal a
maggot infested corpse. Guess they were late and the whole party
flees to the sounds of a big band number and drum solo kicking the
action up...that wasn't there. After some gorgeous shots of the
countryside we witness a bus load of tourists and workers all heading
in the same estate as apparently they have jobs after. Tutors,
professors, chamber maids and workers as a whole felt the need to be
this far out in the country through their exposition. Plot device gardener's flower arrangement story was so boring, it gave the driver
a mild heart attack and he... slightly swerved on the two lane road.
HEAVENS!!!
With mild chest pains causing death,
the trip is off to a good start. Dark omens people. With a quick
bit of moving "the body" around and arranging a blanket
over him, the rest of the party make their way to the estate with
little to no problem. Pre-GPS, kiddies. In them days youse needed a
map and you loved it! Still loved the flute indicating the gruesome
act of concealing the body from the little girl traveling. Sadly no
Edward Mannix voice over acting so that was a bit of a let down.
The pleasant wafting music showing us an empty village, no church or
people to be around.
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| C'mon sweetie. Just ignore the poop smell and go out and play. |
No warning bells going off at all,
people? They all just head right into the local tavern and proceed
to take up rooms without worry of the staff or management getting
angry. Heck one of the rooms has a creeper peephole into
conveniently the cute blonde's room. 20 minutes before we get a
vampire attack but feels like it was unnecessary, in the sense no
vamp fangs revealed.
 |
| The locals are definitely revolting. |
Human servants bustling about explain
why the people were not available but Boris the impromptu mayor
explains creepily how they had to bury a friend. His dub actor is
bouncy and way over the top easily arousing suspicion but that's just
crazy talk. Weird synthesizer music as a villager needs to
sacrifice a leg for dinner. An American tourist also finds this
strange but shrugs it off as it is simply a custom he is unfamiliar
with and chalks it up to his ignorance Slowly but surely the members
of the bus trip are disappearing left and right and Boris just scoffs
at this as clearly they were trying to find their way in the village
or the next one.
Will Hot Blond be next? Will American
blood be too thick or sauce gravy like? Why would you do this to
most of a town??
Director Leon Klimovsky (The
Werewolf versus the Vampire Woman, Leap to Fame, La paz empieza
nunca, The Dracula Saga, Mean Mother, Vengeance of the Zombies, The
People Who Own the Dark and Night of the Walking Dead)
pitches decent atmosphere and pacing, I just felt the dialogue was
lost in the dubbing as it sounds like the cast is a bunch of whiny
bitches through most of this film. The film stock is either damaged
or I did not get the best version of this as it is really dark and
difficult to make out the action half of the time. The townspeople
are actually not really vampires as so much almost cannibals or some
mad ghouls.
Most of the locations are around Madrid
as was with the Count Dracula's Great Love flick but this seems to
move more to the residing villages and then in Estudios Roma for the
interior shots. Unfortunately my copy was very grainy so the print
was not the best to be seen. Very mild nudity, a topless scene here
and there so no orgy. FALSE ADVERTISEMENT!! That being said
however, it was actually kind of creepy. Also the Countess was
smoking hot so bonus. No forced lesbian and/or whipping scenes of
yesterday so all pluses across the board. A vast improvement. I
was expecting some kinky, oil slicked up Jesus Franco BS and was
surprised with a decent story and some folklore of Spain.
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| Jeff Foxworthy: Vampire Hunter. |
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