Okay my fine fiendish fans. I have received my share of disgruntlement on my dismissal of Jim Wynorski films. I claimed I view them as jiggly girl films with a Sci-fi or Horror theme attached to them and many of you got irate about it, protesting and claiming there are vampire flicks, creature features and some decent B-movie goodness to be had. I am certain I have been pretty hard on the guy and he and Fred Olen Ray have introduced me to many beloved Scream Queens so this week I will delve into the depths of Jim Wynorski films and see what is to be found by this fan base. Also so I don't get lynched. The first creature feature to look at I was confused as these two films were released a year apart and on similar topics. This is Komodo vs Cobra a.k.a. Island of the Beasts a.k.a. Komodo versus Cobra a.k.a.Kobra AVI a.k.a. KVC
|Can't wait to eat humans.|
Cobralalalalalalalalalala!!! Heh if you don't get it, yer too damn young. On the secluded island of Isladomas, We see a lead doctor father/daughter duo along with expendable lab assistant. As predicted, lab assistant does not listen to "mad" scientist and is devoured like a 5 year old gobbling pizza. Doctors Richardson (John Henry Richardson of Evil Spawn, Terror Night, Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers, Out of Time, Alienator, Cybernator, Vice Academy 3, The Wasp Woman, Vice Academy 4, Victim of Desires and Treasure Hunt) and scientist hottie daughter Susan (Michelle Borth of Wonderland, The Sisterhood, Freddie, Rampage: The Hillside Strangler Murders, Trespassers, Tell Me You Love Me, The Forgotten, A Good Old Fashioned Orgy and Hawaii Five-0) paddle to safety from...a giant Komodo dragon. When I say giant I mean at least 10 times its normal size. Like a double decker bus with scales. So what in the good gravy is going on?
|Hmm need some Little Richard as we fly.|
Well let's cut to Captain Stoddard (Michael Pare of Eddie and the Cruisers, Streets of Fire, The Philadelphia Experiment, Dragonfight, The Last Hour, Intro the Sun, Sunset Heat, BloodRayne, Postal, BloodRayne: Deliverance, 1968 Tunnel Rats, Far Cry, Road to Hell and BloodRayne: The Third Reich) and his merry ferry service as he is charted for a three hour tour...tee hee. With him is a team of environmentalists (eco warriors, gah), a reporter and camera man in the hope of a scoop but the island has been purchased by the US Navy and that makes it very illegal to be roaming around it, so they drop more dough on the captain and he changes his tune. They're going to prove EeeeeeeEEEvil Military experiments are about this island for...I guess a buttload of money, award for the reporter and maybe the camera guy can afford to go to Australia. Got me folks but we are just getting started.
|How you doin'?|
No sooner are they on the island they can't help but notice fences seems torn down and no one is their at all when they find an abandoned home with Susan in it. I can't help but have Return of the Swamp Thing flashbacks with the house. Maybe someone can clue me in if it is the same house. She explains that her and her father's research was it grow food exponentially to help solve world hunger issues by enlarging the vegetables making larger portions. Personally I just envisioned bulbous obese people heading to Wal-Mart for more servings for giant kabobs but I am screwy like that. The military liaisons tell them they need to try the same formula on reptiles to create a viable bio weapon. I guess air drops of kaiju like creatures in Afghanistan perhaps?? Got me on the long term plans there.
Well at least it wasn't radiation creating these gargantuan monsters, then we are getting into giant ants of Them or Peter Graves' The Beginning of the End and giant grasshoppers. Nope we are into genetic manipulation (the atomic mutations of the 90s to 2000s).
A few nitpicks coming now and you knew it was going to happen. The nine millimeter Taurus hold fifteen rounds in the mag and 1 in the pipe. Heh, still love that term but Pare fires off close to 40 rounds before changing magazines (no, I do not say or write clips) so I got a bit of a snicker out but nothing compared to the chuckle I got from Major Frank (Paul Logan of L.E.T.H.A.L. Ladies: Return to Savage Beach, Stripper Wives, House of Love, Angel, The Curse of the Komodo, The Eliminator, Way of the Vampire, Days of Our Lives and Vampire in Vegas) and his comms radio piece. Props dropped the ball there. Looks like a well-built man ready to take my Arby's order. Curly fries with that. Still loved the doc's comment as she glances down at her Taurus 9mm, "It's gonna take more than a .38 to stop what's on this island." Oops. Well she's a geneticist not a ballistics major.
Comprehensive wise, we have a military experiment gone horribly awry, creatures of unusual proportion, gunfire and one liners. Not a bad flick and amazingly PG-13 so let the kiddies watch the CGI creatures snack on the humans and each other. The film is very similar to Curse of the Komodo except those characters were a tad more interesting and given the fair degree of nudity, probably wanna skip letting the kiddies see that one. Check IMDB for all the alternative titles or be prepared to handle explaining why that lady has her boobies out.
|Putting my foot down.|