Thursday, May 11, 2017

Return of the Cult Classics: The Lair of the White Worm


And we are back. Well while getting the bathroom remodeled (Not our choice at all) I thought I would get back at the week. Today's film in RETURN OF CULT CLASSICS...we skibble across the pond from director Ken Russell (The Devils, Tommy, Altered States, The Lair of the White Worm, Lady Chatterley, Treasure Island, Tales of Erotica, Dogboys and Trapped Ashes) and brought loosely based on Bram Stoker telling of the English legend of the D'Ampton Worm. Recognizing the cast from several BBC series, ranging from comedies, dramas and science fiction, it does my heart good to have a small sense of culture. Heir to the D' Ampton Estate in County Durham, John D'Ampton was said to have done battle with a giant worm that was terrorizing the local villages. So we are watching that...with boobies. This is The Lair of the White Worm.


Must be warm in her house.  Honest.














A young Scottish archeologist name of Angus Flint (Peter Capaldi of The Secret Agent, Chandler & Co, Neverwhere, Fortysomething, The Best Man, Waking the Dead, Doctor Who, Torchwood and Paddington) is excavating the site of a covenant near at the Derbyshire bed and breakfast (in spite of it feels more like a tavern) which is ran by the Trent Sisters, Mary (Sammi Davis of Mona Lisa, Hope and Glory, Lionheart, Homefront, Four Rooms, Woundings and The Double Born) and Eve (Catherine Oxenberg of Dynasty, The Love Boat, Roman Holiday TV Movie, Acapulco H.E.A.T., Treacherous Beauties, Watch Over Me and Starship Troopers 3: Marauder). An bizarre and large skull is unearthed and holds certain snake like characteristics with the flint and burial mound about it giving it a rough date of at least a thousand years ago, almost giving credit to the legends of the D'Ampton legend of the wyrm.


Dr. Ian Malcolm will have a field day with this!













In a nearby manor, the Temple House, Lady Sylvia Marsh (Amanda Donohoe of Castaway, The RainbowDark Obsession, L.A. Law, A Woman's Guide to Adultery, Liar Liar, One Night Stand, The Calling and Trafficker) returns to the region after a prolonged hiatus. At a gathering, Angus encounters Lord James D' Ampton (Hugh Grant of The Last Place on Earth, The Dawning, The Lady and the Highwayman, Four Weddings and a Funeral, Sense and Sensibility, Extreme Measures, About a Boy, Love Actually, The Rewrite and The Man from U.N.C.L.E.) direct descendant of John D'Ampton who recently inherited the manor and the lands not far from Temple House. The two begin to strike up a friendship as well as their own theories on whether there is truth to the legends. The folk song of the D'Ampton Wyrm was catchy and enjoyable.


Fear the superimposed flames of damnation!!!














Shortly after this, people in the nearby villages are missing. A few at a time, raising all sorts of questions and concerns. The skull has been taken from Angus's room, The Trent sisters have their father's fob watch that was missing for more than a year with their parents discovered at Stonerich Cavern miles from the farmhouse/bed and breakfast and folks are skittish as hell. James and Angus postulate that an ancient cult was formed around the time of that land being Mercia, the Roman creation for England against the Saxons and that they may have been Wyrm Worshippers treating this ancient monster as a god fulfilling it with blood sacrifices. All this ties around the arrival of Lady Syliva...hmm I wonder if there is a connection.

Will the Wyrm turn again? Will the cult revive? Does Angus have a beef with James?






Quick bit of observation was seeing one of London's hardest working character actors, Paul Brooke. Who? Well my first introduction to him was the Rancor Keeper in Return of the Jedi.  A talented chap to be certain but not really wanting to see him without his shirt again. PC Erny (Paul Brooke of Return of the Jedi, Reilly: Ace of Spies, Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes, The Kit Curran Radio Show, Mystery!: Campion, The Fool, The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles and Agatha Christie's Marple) Well there is a fair degree of nudity so the menfolk should be happy...unless depictions of Romans raping nuns might freak them out.   There's an issue with a stick. I have heard of a devining rod or dowsing rod if you will for finding natural water springs or even oil but um...this one detects virgin women. Yeesh. Aside from that, you do have a suspenseful ghost story/legend, the practical effects are fair minus the giant snake puppet and I felt our antagonist was revealed a touch too early.   Might want the kiddies to skip this one too. 


Blimey, another Four Weddings and a Funeral fan.