America 3000

Welcome back my readers. For those of you in the Midwest, sorry for your blizzard wind conditions. Hope it lets up soon. Those of you in the West Coast, I envy you so much right now. Today's movie is another journey back to the 80s as we are back in Post-Apocalyptic staple. Yeah I know I watch quite a few of these but I thought I would explore more into the lovely and vivacious Laurene Landon's career and this title just grabbed me. This is America 3000.

Hmm, this one will do nicely.

Yay! Two alternate titles called Thunder Women and Thunder Warriors!  No idea why I love that so much.  Our friends via Cannon and Golan-Globus produced this. Written and directed by David Engelbach (Death Wish II, Over the Top, MacGuyver) our story starts 900 years after the bombs dropped in 1992, (making this timeline roughly 2892), the world has been reduced to a stone age (Thought my observation says almost iron age) as a tribe of amazon like women rule over the existing populous, making sure man does not overthrow them.   Naturally, this could cause a bit of tension.  Women decide roles in the tribes according to the regs of Tiara.  Quick warning, these amazons are very coiffed. 80's hair be there.  More than an assortment of loin cloths and shammies died for this film like so many Bothans.

Women on horseback, lashing their slaves to guitar rock. Don't you have to pay extra for that? Not up on my flogging etiquette, so I ask my male and female readers on that one.

Oops. That intern didn't get her coffee.

A young lad who tires of being a sex object and a breeder, Korvis and his laborer buddy Gruss flee from the Fraus in search of freedom and building their camp of sausage fest. Yeah I am not sure what's going on there but not woman one.

Grown up Korvis (Chuck Wagner of General Hospital, Automan, All My Children, Loving,Dynasty, Matlock and The Sisterhood) and Gruss (William Wallace of Beverly Hills Cop, Delta Force, Avenging Force, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Troop Beverly Hills, Born on the Fourth of July and Solo)strive to free their fellow man from this injust tyranny. Yeah, boo hoo. Oh woe is me. I have to give orgasms to hot women. CRY BABY!

Men are encamped and separated to needs of the tribe. Laborers, servants, seeders (breeding population control) and some are just for fun. Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge. Almost feels like Gor for how the men are treated. Um really stringent feminism? Eh, whatever.

With a total lack of machines, damn dirty apes, my usual riffing is held up until the monster which looks like the offspring of Chewbacca and Meatloaf roaming the lands with a boom box. Won't lie.  I got the biggest laugh out of that. Then I remembered where they were shooting and had huge amounts of pity for that guy in his monster booties.  His burbles were less intelligible than Chewie.   I think he was gargling raw goat balls.   Hey, I am an amateur audio engineer with good ears. I know goat ball gargling when I hear it.

Glam Gal in Charge.

There are more primitive men called Plougats. Sloping foreheads, rudimentary hand tools, ridiculous beards and melee weapons. Apparently they can't farm so they ambush the tribes for food and probably for breeding purposes as well. No giant irradiated monsters so yeah it was kind of calm.

With their queen Reya (Camilla Sparv of Murderers' Row, The High Commissioner, The Rockford Files, Winter Kills and The Naked Truth) nearing death, her daughter Vena (Laurene Landon of Hundra, Yellow Hair and the Fortress of Gold, Maniac Cop, Maniac Cop 2, 1313: Hercules Unbound!, Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance and Syndicate Smasher) is to be the next Tiara, follow a map and sounds like quest time. Yup gotta have a good quest. Her sister Lakella (Victoria Barrett of Hot Resort, Three Kinds of Heat, Cheers and Russian Holiday) looks a bit pissed to not have been named the successor. Just an observation.

Thanks to plot device...er I mean a simple alphabet book, Korvis can understand English enough to realize they have been up-top an underground bunker, filled with firearms. Will Korvis overthrow the tribes of women?   Can woman and man live together in peace?  How many of these guys did they castrate?

In spite of this being a Post Apocalyptic film, zero skin and mild violence. Yeah this has a PG-13 rating so I was spared 20 billion rape scenarios. THANK GOD. The film is slow in places, we have time span speech that adulterates speech and pollutes meanings but I'm a quick study. We have a narrative that establishes certain facets of the film, filling in the blanks and overall it isn't a bad flick.

Unlike your typical cataclysm story line, no vehicles, heavy use of firearms, or real struggle against marauders. There is no demand of oil, water or political upheaval.

This is all supposed to be taking place in Colorado and geographically speaking that would be roughly Colorado Springs near NORAD.

Point of fact, in the year of 1986 our feature was shot in Israel. Kinda nifty, right? Colorado might have been a bit too lush and vibrant with fauna and flora. Sorry for the logo pop. This was found on a streaming site that taped it from Impact TV via TNT in the day. 

Grandpa...fading...

Biohazard

Howdy folks. Well because of the re-release of the revamped with new bells and whistles Resident Evil 2, I decided to find something to brand that up. So digging through the archives of producer/writer/director Fred Olen Ray for anything resembling that and well...the Japanese title is acknowledged with this film buuuuut...I'm not sure what I am in for. This is Biohazard.

Are Boobs and I invited to the phone conversation?

Written and directed by Fred Olen Ray (Evil Toons, Star Hunter, Night Shade, Illicit Dreams 2,Tomb of the Werewolf, Bikini Airways, Teenage Cavegirl and Nuclear Hurricane) and I am not as versed with him as I am Jim Wynorski or their Italian mockbuster counterpart Bruno Mattei, so this should be interesting. I did see Alienator with Ross Hagen, John Phillip Law, Jan Michael Vincent, P.J. Soles and Joseph Pilato. Yes I recognized them all because...I have reviewed a lot of film, TV and near photographic memory.

Our movie begins as most do, with some simple slide texts and some synthesizer. We open with a APC driving into Vasquez Rocks??!!! AHHHH!!!! Sorry, sorry. I am a wee bit sick of this as a location. I get its appeal of being remote and isolated but ugh. Just a bit irked I can recognize it by sight.

Hearing a giger counter bury the needle is always a cause for alarm in my book. Could also have been a stock sound effect. Gonna punch most of our "Military Men" as NONE of them bothered with a G.I.cut. HAIR GROWS BACK! Well, for most of us. I hadn't taken in account of male pattern baldness. My bad.

As the experiments continue, experts range from a scientist Dr. Williams (Art Payton of Beverly Hills Madam, Never Too Young to Die, Emanon, Defense Play and Knots Landing) to a rather chesty psychic, name of Lisa (Angelique Pettyjohn of The Girl from U.N.C.L.E., Get Smart, The Touch of Her Flesh, Clambake, Star Trek and Hell's Belles)

So our heroes are experimenting with transmitting and assembling matter from nearby dimensions. Yup, the physics are right out the window with this grade of Sci-Fi but you normally expect it in 70s to 80s TV. Not everyone has a blue police box at the ready. So scientists twisting space and time and basically giving God the middle finger. Well this will clearly not backfire.

Probably measuring zombie rads like Zombi '90.

Transport expert and ex-military, Mitchell Carter (William Fair of Deep Space, Take My Daughters, Please, The First Power, Marked for Murder and Deep Impact) and his driver get to the secret lab in time to watch General Randolph (Aldo Ray of Johnny Nobody, The Virginian, The Violent Ones, The Green Berets, The Houndcats, The Centerfold Girls, Black Samurai and The Lucifer Complex) blow his top. With this science being fiddle faddle, poppycock and utter balderdash, Dr. Williams is hoping to change his mind.

They manifest some sort of container and naturally the general called dibs, ignores the scientist because...plot device.   I mean military intelligence knows all!   We also do not comment on how uniforms don't match military chain.  One guy is in civvies camo style. Again we are behaving. 

Trick 'r Treat, sucka!

Naturally the Army is made to look like asses as the container breaches and out comes!...a very small alien. Like the size of a kid. Um, okay. So toddler Clawful smacks a grunt to death and escapes into the wilderness.

Carter and Lisa team up to chase the creature down. Lisa seems to exhibit empathy rather than telepathy. Not sure if that was important but I noticed that. Of course since they are working together she feeds him Dinty Moore stew and then proceeds to mack him on the couch, with the girls out on display. Must be co-operational behavior.

Can Carter and Lisa capture or destroy our itty bitty invader??  Will General Randolph stop burbling lines like he is drunk?  How does Lisa's bra handle the strain??

I recognized precisely two people in this flick and that is rare I do not recognize more. Maybe more Fred Olen Ray films will fix that oversight. Aldo Ray I clocked from Black Samurai with Jim Kelly. Let's not get back into the hate crimes of that flick. Angelique Pettyjohn took even longer and then I remembered my original Star Trek era and Gamemasters of Triskelion popped in my head. Ample and very curvy, she tends to stand out. Buxom, I believe will get the point across.

At 84 minutes, we have a killer ET that is roaming Southern Cali with murder on his mind. The transmat device interacting with psychic energy sounds straight out of Tom Baker Doctor Who era and some light to moderate skin with your violence. A few blocking issues and I swear Aldo Ray was drunk for his scenes but all in all this can be a fun drinking game for movie tropes.

The creature costume looks pretty damn impressive courtesy of Kenneth J. Hall (Ghoulies, Critters, Carnosaur, Puppet Master 4, Puppet Master 5, Jack Frost, and The Clown at Midnight) and Fred's son, director Christopher Ray (Reptisaurus, Megaconda, 2-Headed Shark Attack, Mercenaries, Circus Kane and Minutes to Midnight) was roaming around it the bio suit at age 5.

An amusing side note, the Mexican VHS release was called Space Gremlins or Gremlins del Espacio if you prefer.

I sense you are gawking at me.

The Initiation

Hello again my readers and welcome back for more 80s Horror Throwback. What could be more 80s than what we already experienced? Well, how about an obscure 1984 maniac slasher film that didn't get a massive collective of sequels? Yeah I know that many of you are confused but not every low budget slasher film was deemed necessary or worthy of sequels. Now look at some of those Fridays and Halloweens and tell me if they did a decent job all the way through. No instead of griping about lack of continuity or grasp of temporal mechanics, let's give view to actor turned director Larry Stewart in his incursion into horror. This is The Initiation.

So that Lonestar guy just starts hitting on me. Ewwww...

A gaggle of sorority sisters jiggling and giggling while a deranged nutter butter stalks them? Let me guess, he escaped a secured maximum wacko basket, visited the local hardware store and is on the loose?

Our film's location is Dallas/ Ft. Worth so you got a lot of ground to cover.  Our story focuses around Kelly Fairchild (Daphne Zuniga of The Sure Thing, Modern Girls, Spaceballs, Last Rites,Melrose Place, Monkey in the Middle adn Beyond Paradise), our plucky protagonist who has a recurring dream of a strange man burning to death, screaming and flailing himself inside her childhood house. Seriously 80s, did any of the teen protagonists have a pseudo-quasi, normal childhood? If that wasn't stress enough, Kelly is taking part in initiation for her sorority house. A group of pledges have to break into her dad's department store after hours with several of her friends. Simultaneously, miles away from all this gallivanting; a sanitarium has a riot, nutters get free and a nurse has been forked to death. (I WROTE FORKED, PERVS!).

NO ONE ESCAPES THE CLAW!!!!

Mother and Father Fairchild cracked me up as it is Frances (Vera Miles of The Searchers, Psycho, Follow Me, Boys!, The Spirit is Willing, Hotel, Murder, She Wrote and Separate Lives) and Dwight (Clu Gulager of The Killers, The Last Picture Show, A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge, Uninvited, The Return of the Living Dead, Gunfighter, Feast, Piranha 3DD, and Blue Jay). I guess more Clu Gulager equals boobs and gore for your horror film. That morning, Frances and Dwight have been notified of the escape as if a dark secret is about to rear its ugly head. Those aren't Dwight's real boobs!!! GASP!! Uh I mean Angela's a boy!!! Um Ricky has a psychic link to an annoying blind girl?

Jinkies, Kelly being a good girl is a bit concerned for the evening's event as she goes to hang out with Peter (James Read of North and South, North and South, Book II, Legally Blonde, American Dreams and Charmed)to work on her thesis for psychology and hopes to understand her nightmares. It just means you into Rick James, baby. That's all.

Yes Debbie, they're real. k?

Back at the department store, the night porter has the life expectancy of a Starfleet red shirt. Now the killer has free reign of the multi-level store. Now to steal all the parachute pants and linen suit jackets! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Kelly, Marcia (Marilyn Kagan of Foxes, Mork & Mindy, Hart to Hart, The Ladies Club and Ellen) and Alison all agreed to split up to look for these uniforms for the initiation. Y'know, instead of the girls sticking together and Kelly leading them all to where the uniforms would be. Cause that would make sense!

While the bodies are stacking up like cord wood, Peter does a work-through with the microfilm and news clippings of convenience describing Kelly's childhood fire as a floor manager at Dwight's store.

Is the killer this Mr. Crispy? Can nothing be done to stop the maniac? What of the secret of the Yeti?

The Bold and the Beautiful fans should get a kick out of seeing Hunter Tylo a.k.a. Dr. Taylor Hayes as Alison in this flick. This is assuming The Bold and the Beautiful fans read my blog.

So with a few plot twists, a red herring here and there, this isn't a bad slasher. Daphne's performance stands out the most because she is really trying to emote and it shows. It had some genuine kill counts, some impressive gore effects, the acting was solid and honestly it was creepy. It would have been creepier, if I didn't see the writing on the wall of 80s tropes coming to fruition. That's okay. I have seen a fair amount of Horror than most.

He died as he lived. Mistaken for wood.

Uninvited

Hey gang, welcome back to 80 Horror Throwback. So I have to say the notion of a Killer Cat film outside Poe's Black Cat via Lucio Fulci is foreign territory. Seen enough Killer Dog flicks than you can shake a stick at. So why not add a few more unlikely scenarios. Say for example, a mafia don hosting a party on his yacht in the Caribbean? Scientists tinkering with Fluffy's DNA creating a virtual monster? This is Uninvited a.k.a. Killer Cat

They gave him one too many shots.

Yup sadly only one English Alternative Title this time around. What can you do?   Our film was written and directed by Greydon Clark (Black Shampoo, Angel's Revenge, Final Justice, Dark Future, Mad Dog Coll and Star Games) so yes there is an exploitation background and two of his films have featured on MST3K so you know we may have some chop in the water with this one.

With our instrumental and credits interspersed with a mild bit of exposition, our two doctors believe the test subject has a tumor ranging inside of it (Obligatory Arnold quote: "Eet's not a Tumah!) so you know PETA and ASPCA are already annoyed. Our subject is a fluffy orange tabby that looked a bit disturbed at a impeding shot they were going to give him when he he bolts away. Should they have closed the door? Hmm, sound thinking but we don't have time for rational thought.

A further note is one of the doctors calls for radiation security. So now we have armed men in hazmat suits? The furball is nuclear??! What the nine hells is that about? Tranqing him, the security team thinks they got him (It's a trick, get an ax.) and he proceeds to go sick house on them, spraying cherry pie all over the walls. Yes some bizarre mutation allowing him to house another creature inside of him like a host to a parasite (Thanks for the spoiler reveal in 3 minutes and forty-eight seconds!) allowing him to skibble away with POV shots that would have been better served on a Jeeper Creeper because the shot looks like either a human hunkered over or a Great Dane with a Go Pro.

Dr Grady (Greydon Clark) and his lab assistant (Only titled as Lab Assistant) Paul proceed to lower mesh metal gates in a parking lot have secured the building and they're going after the cat. Yeah best of luck with that. I expect Boysenberry blood spatter similar to the previous cherry pie gunk. FYI, the stock cat sound effects in ADR is really limited and slightly ridiculous.

Subplot 2 is two girls trying to find a hotel for Spring Break are aided by a mysterious Mr. Graham (Alex Cord of Route 66, The Brotherhood, Police Sotry, Airwolf, Airwolf TV Movie and Fire from Below), a shady fellow living in the hotel. Hmm... the plot thickens? Suzanne (Shari Shattuck of Hot Child in the City, Freddy's Nightmares, Goddess of Love, Mad About You, Death Spa, Dallas and Silk Stalkings) and Bobbie (Clare Carey of Zombie High, Waxwork, Coach So Little Time, Point Pleasant and Jericho) are just a tad clueless to the bright neon sign over Graham's head that says: I AM A MAFIOSO but it happens.

Tee hee.  We have bewbs.

Graham needs to tend to a "meeting" with his "associates" Mike (George Kennedy of The Silent Witness, Have Gun- Will Travel, Hush...Hush, Sweet Charlotte,Airport, The Naked Gun, Dallas and The Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell of Fear) and Albert (Clu Galager of Have Gun- Will Travel, The Rebel, The Tall Man, The Virginian, The Return of the Living Dead, A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge, Walker, Texas Ranger and Feast), to go over Subplot 3 of the Mafia angle and a deal of great importance.

It seems their weaselly trader/banker Darryl (Michael Holden of Automan, Freddy's Nightmares,Cheers, L.A. Law, Reasonable Doubts, Fallout and 24) is having a devil of a time, money laundering. The FTC (Federal Trade Commission) has been snooping around the irregularities of flux of money is getting paranoid being small potatoes and knows if he screws up he will have 10 to 25 years with a cellmate/boyfriend name of Bubba. A hot tub bubbly bath of drowning later and we know Darryl's not gonna flip.

Vic Vega didn't age well.

Felonious feline forays to the dock, sneaks on aboard the yacht and the body count starts racking up. Again it's a cat. Regardless of its mutation, it's called a hammer. They're five bucks. BONK! BONK!

The puppetry is fair, but it doesn't exactly strike fear into my heart. The husband/wife duo Jim and Debi Boulden (Predator, White fang, Strays, Strange Days, Sabrina, the Teenage Witch) built a nasty looking tabby but again not terror inducing as a whole regardless of the professional creation and the camera blocking.

I am told this particular flick wound up in Rifftrax via Michael Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett so yes you may want to watch that version than this straight through. An additional amusement with the level of gore, nudity and blood spattering against the bulk heads, this cinematic creation fell under PG-13.

A ratings error or did it go straight to video in the day and no one was paying attenion? I do not have all the answers on that one. With 90 minutes on the clock, it is distracting enough for unintentional humor and yes I would say it is a good bad movie for those that love them. So if you want some mindless violence, jiggly girl gallivanting and carnage candy, well this is the film for you. 

This is my stop, Tex!

Night of the Comet

Welcome back to the blog! Today we start 80s Horror Throwback. Here's hoping at any rate, all the films chosen for this I have never seen. GASP! Yes, it is true. I am slightly lacking in my 80s Horror alumni. With that I bring you mad scientists, a scourge of zombies and two Valley girls. For those that already know this title, yeah it never fell on my radar. As for the rest of us, sit back and bear with me. This is Night of the Comet a.k.a. Teenage Mutant Horror Comet Zombies.

SMG toting teens!

Got to be honest, never saw the working title turned print. At the helm of this ship is writer/director Thom Eberhardt (Sole Survivor, The Night Before, Without a Clue, Captain Ron, Face Down, Ratz and I Was a Teenage Faust), so with his colorful background he has handled quite a few genre so should be fun.  Warning for younger and mature readers!   There will be...80s hair! Teased with Aqua Net or possibly more Mousse than Bullwinkle. You have been warned!

This comet returns to the planet Earth and the world seems totally stoked. (80s lingo, I apologize) Well that is except for Regina (Catherine Mary Stewart of The Apple, The Last Starfighter, Weekend at Bernie's, Dead at 17, Limitless and Red Dead Redemotion II) Samantha Belmont (Kelli Maroney of Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Chopping Mall, Ryan's Hope, Big Bad Mama II, Not of This Earth, Scream Queen Hot Tub Party, Pop Star and Hell's Kitty). In their collective off hours not working for a movie theater as ushers, I guess they kill werewolves and vampires. Belmont...Castlevania joke? Sigh... Moving on, there are perks for Regina as she's necking with Danny Picket er um Depree (Michael Bowen of Valley Girl, Private Resort, Iron Eagle, Jackie Brown, Kill Bill: Vol. 1, Walking Tall and Lost) in the projection booth.

Zombie Grady Sanford, NOoOoOoOo!!!!

Meanwhile Samantha is stuck at a Comet party, watching her way too flirty stepmom Doris(Sharon Farrell of Marlowe, The Reivers, Lone Wolf McQuade, Can't Buy Me Love, Arccade, Yakuza Connection JAG and Broken at Love) try to mount everything while hubby is out of town.

A low filter over the camera with dust blowing everywhere indicates that L.A.isn't doing so hot. Red dust blowing all around when it dawns on you that red dust is PEOPLE!!! Cars, homes and the streets are cluttered with crumpled piles of clothes. One could almost call them the lucky few, just obliterated to carbon atoms. Regina wakes after a most likely disappointing sex with Depree and stumbles into what I can only describe as a survival horror video game but she only gets one life. DUN DUN DUN!!! Thankfully she does upgrade past her melee weapon, the monkey wrench and has borrowed a cycle to check on her sister Sam.

Now how does a Valley girl defend herself, you ask? Well she's an Army brat, so that means hand to hand and firearms training. Noticing the downtown is as deserted as a Toto concert, Regina makes her way back home.

Last Known Photograph.

The zombies are capable of speech and using weapons, so no Romero formula there. Maybe their just hideously scarred cannibals. Yeah that makes everything so much better. The whole while I am watching this when trucker Hector Gomez (Robert Beltran of Calender Girl Murders, Slam Dance, Models Inc., Star Trek: Voyager, Star Trek Voyager: Elite Force, Manticore and Big Love) comes on screen, I am torn between making Lone Wolf McQuade Kayo references or Chakotay Star Trek:Voyager references.

During the interval, an underground location known as a think tank actually talks to Sam on the radio but she's a bit of an airhead and didn't get details.

The shopping montage reminiscent of Dawn of the Dead. Jamming out to Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun", was a nice touch as well. A shoot-out with Mall Mauraders was interesting as well.

What you have hear is a post apocalyptic film with a touch of Dawn of the Dead, Valley Girl and Better Off Dead. Gruesome FX, kick ass girls and who truly knows the think tank's ultimate goals.

With half a million in the kitty for pre and post production, our zombie FX was handled by veteran makeup artists David B. Miller (Freddy's Nightmares, Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare, Needful Things, My Girl 2, Night of the Scarecrom, The Mangler and Batman & Robin) and William Snyder (John Carpenter's The Thing,Trial by Terror, Running Hot, Savage Streets, Night of the Comet and Barfly), this film grossed over 14 million. Not a bad investment there at all..

The biggest impressive creation was the think tank. All done with scale models and forced perspective and trust me, without the Blu-Ray release; it is damn hard to tell otherwise. That gorgeous bike was a 1972 650cc Triumph T120 Bonneville and yeah it is damn hard to come by these days.

Interesting side note, the theater Regina and Depree work at is the El Rey Theater, a historic theater used in films like: Thank God It's Friday, Zombiethon and Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back. Okay, I thought it was interesting,

Finding a copy of this isn't too difficult but thank God I am not doing a Video Review on it. I have to cover international, VHS, re-distribution in the credits or someone would complain. These days, the 2007 MGM release for DVD and the 2013 Shout! Factory Scream! Factory Blu-ray release covers quite a bit. I for one will be adding this to my collection.

Clowns.  Harbingers of Doom.

Minds on My Money

Hey there folks. I am back and I have a doozy here to review. Fella by the name of Shane Vozar sought me out for a quick review on his film. Hey, it's what I do, babies. Now as I understand it, he has been playing this horror host character Mormo for about ten years and this flick sort of unfolds like an acid trip and a seminar at the same time. This is Minds on My Money.

Evil Ernie??

With work on A Bulldog for Christmas and Bloody Island I had to dig a bit to find what other work he might be upto and came across a cable access series called Chester Grim's Mausoleum. Along his YouTube channel entitled Mormo Zine.

So yes this feels more like a introduction to a film, detailing what he wants from it, rather than showing us what he could do in horror. More of a step by step setup through SEO, Social media and handling cryptocurrency. Um, I don't seem to find a movie on here. There is eerie stock horror organ music, we have a post production flame effect similar to that explosion one I like to use.

A dastardly duo!

It's not really clear the purpose of the film. It's got plenty of ideas going but there is not real focuse or subject. I am afraid it bounces are over. I have no idea what I am watching. Pro cryptocurrency accounts? Bolstering increased views? I normally put out an objective review on most but I will be damned if I knew what I was watching.

I was under the belief that this was a horror film he had not released to the public yet. Instead I just see tips on increasing algorithm that may or may not bone smaller subscriptions. 

As confused as I was, I leave you gentle readers the link to it, Minds on My Money

I guess that is all I have,folks. This week I will be tackling some 80s Horror flicks so I hope you enjoy my take on those as well.

Captain Spaulding Casual Friday.

Robowoman

Hiya boys and girls! I'm back and ready to blog. That fricking #34 Rotten Ramblin' On took far too much time editing. Will explain at a later date. Today, a director who you all by now if you have been reading this blog, contacted me for a write-up. Rather a regular on this blog, director/writer/editor Dustin Ferguson (Doll Killer, Die Sister, Die!, Gloved Murderess, Cheerleader Camp: To the Death, Invitation to Die and Nemesis 5: The New Model) asked if I wouldn't mind giving his flick the once over. Naturally, the answer is yes.  Penned by writer Mike Reeb (Nemesis 5, House of Pain, Horndog's Beach Party) gives off  the styling feeling almost like a hybrid of Ms. 45 and Robocop, I am completely down for this. This is Robowoman.

Petite and pistol packing!

With an opening shot of L.A.via some damn fine drone footage and treated some radio exposition of violent crimes, we follow the story of Vivica Stevens ( Dawna Lee Heising of Blade Runner, Kung Fu: The Movie, Forbidden Warrior, Waiting for Dracula, Legend of the Red Reaper, Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance and Meathook Massacre II), hard at work for a temp agency and anyone that has worked temp can appreciate that grind, scowls from the regulars that you are a scab worker and so on.

Hounding her for a night on the town, a persistant co-worker Jonathan (Johnathan Nation of Flight World War II, Erotic Vampires of Beverly Hills, Circus Kane, Jurassic Galaxy and Runaway Nightmare) is pleading for a date; reluctantly Vivica lowers her shields and decides to give this goof a chance. I wasn't really feeling good vibrations of this cat, but hey I'm not female or gay, so what the hell do I know?

She's looking for Sarah Connor?

Still being sensible, Vivica calls her roommate Carlenee (Sue Price of Nemesis 2: Nebula, Nemesis 3: Time Lapse, Nemesis 4: Death Angel, Nemesis: The New Model and House of Pain) to give her the heads up that she will be out with Jonathan and a few of his buddies. Carlenee tells her to be careful and use good judgement. Sheesh, okay Mom. It's just Robby's (Gregory Blair of AbsurdTV Show, Horndogs Beach Party, Abaddon, Ugly Sweater Party, Lockdown, Garden Party Massacre and Wall of Flesh: A Vintage Comedy)birthday. What could go wrong?

The night goes for a turn for the worse as Jonathan and his "buddies" jump poor Vivica in a parking lot and proceed to...will "bad touch" do well enough for you folk? Yeah I know, I know rape revenge isn't my best subgenre to tackle but bear with me. Viciously attacked and left for dead, Vivica is barely hanging on, needing help badly. Carlenee tracks her to the park finding her in the mess that she is in, violated and hurt.

Isolated in a hospital, Vivica is touch and go, a Doctor Michaels (Mel Novak of Game of Death, Cat in the Cage, An Eye for an Eye, Future War, Vampire Assassin, Samurai Cop 2: Deadly Vengeance, Check Point and Holy Terror) and his assistant Hannah (Vida Ghaffari of Near Death, Circus of Dread, The Mindy Project, Eye on Entertainment, Facebook Live with Ford & Vida, Horndogs Beach Party, Holy Terror, Suspense and Hybristophilla) offering Vivica a new arm, a means of rewiring her optic nerves and giving her life back. Maybe not as before but better than bed ridden and injured. Helloooo Nurse Hannah! Sorry, sucker for a pretty face.

Moving right along, the procedure is a bit delicate and not completely legal but it is the building blocks of cybernetics. Carlenee must decide for Vivica and save her friend. Undergoing surgery, she is outfitted with a visor to compensate for her eye damage and now a killer right hook. The punch. They didn't give her a hook for an arm. Emotionally, Vivica is trying to keep things together but not able to cry is turning her stomach. Perhaps some martial arts and self defense to ease the soul, mind and body?

Confronting her demons, Vivica tries to move on from that night and Carlenee is really being the awesome, supportive friend she needs but she cannot shake it away from her thoughts. She seems to be off center with all the odd series of murders happening in her neighborhood. I'd think about moving but that's me.

L.A. after 2 p.m.

In a nutshell ,we have a Sci-Fi look at modern hate crimes, rape and murder and how society doesn't seem to register it being horrific as it really is. This blend of a rape revenge/science fiction shows Dawna can really perform. To see her range of cold decisive to conflicted and emotional was a real treat. I couldn't get over how warm Sue Price was in her performance as well. Keep in mind, I have only seen Sue Price as a muscle bound warrior crossing space and time, so a nurturing role was a bit startling but welcome. My only complaint is we needed a villain worthy of David Hess (Last House on the Left, Hitch-Hike, House on the Edge of the Park and Swamp Thing) or Henry Silvia (The Manchurian Candidate, Above the Law and Dick Tracy).  Jonathan Nation just looks like a really nice guy. 

With returns of regulars in the Ferguson alumni is legendary Scream Queen Brinke Stevens (Private School, Sole Survivor, Fatal Games, Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama, Cheerleader Massacre) actor/producer Mark Popejoy (Mark Popejoy of Die Sister, Die!, The Eyes of Isabelle, Gloved Murderess and Shivers Down Your Spine) and Clint Beaver (The Dummy 2, Tales for the Campfire 2, Meathook Massacre II, Worng Side of the Tracks, Nemesis 5: The New Model and Amityville: Evil Never Dies), it is easily understood that Ferguson is easy going, know what to expect from his cast and crew and they deliver in record time.

A quick and special shoutout at SFX creator, Joe Castro(Xenophobia, Terror Toons 4, 9 Ways to Hell and Night of the Demons 3). Responsible for Dawna's visor and cyberarm, she embodies looking like a badass and stunt coordinator Shaun Vetick (Blood Rites, Flyover Country, Flat Water Terrors Volume 1, Say Goodbye, Grace: A Detective Story and Robowoman) giving our cyborg some martial arts training and pointers. Kudos for Wilheim screams (Stock sound effect of a man screaming used in over 389 films and dozens upon dozens of TV shows) being used.

Long term view? This definitely screams out of a sequel. Hell maybe two. We'll just have to wait and see.

Candid pose?  Perhaps.

Reign of the Supermen

And I am back. Still editing the podcast last week. Lot of audio clean up so clearly time for a blog. I was 16 and ultimately the big blue boy scout faced off with what many believed an unstoppable foe. In the end, both this Doomsday killing machine and Superman destroyed one another, thus killing each other. Understand, several annuals of Superman throughout the years; they always hinted that Superman could die and until 1992, those were always the building blocks to the Elseworlds (DC Comics version of Marvel's What If...) So 26 years later, this year it was placed on the small and big screen for viewers to watch what overall was a decent story line and beginning of new and old characters in his universe. This is The Reign of Supermen.

Using his X-ray peepers at a 24 Hour Fitness. Shame!

Glossing over the three part crossovers of the Superman titles and Justice League, the world mourned the loss of one of their greatest heroes, many villains looked to Metropolis as ripe for the pickings and the League carrying the weight of the rest of the planet without him. Four separate beings bearing the S shield have been seen around the world and Metropolis. A visored energy projector looking like Superman, a young teen, an armored Man of Steel and a cybernetic Superman.

Shaq??!!

The Superboy is a clone of the original and unlike his comic book counterpart, he is solely created by Lexcorp rather than CADAMUS. The visored Superman comes off cold, methodical and with no moral code against killing like the big blue. Our armored Man of Steel developed his own power suit that let's face it, can take a beating as well as give one. Lastly the cyborg Superman who seems to have his essence and battle scars.

CYBER VD happens, kids! Wear protection!

With the Justice League and Titans spread thin, the world is unaware just how much was on Superman's shoulders to defend and protect his adopted world.

Let's talk voice cast. Because damn there is a lot of familiar names here. Supes voiced by none other than Jerry O' Connell (Stand by Men, Sliders, Crossing Jordan, Las Vegas,Justice League Dark, Justice League vs. Teen Titans and The Death of Superman) Lois Lane via Rebecca Romijn (X-Men, Femme Fatale, The Punisher, Eastwick, King & Maxwell and The Librarians) Wonder Woman by the astonishing Rosario Dawson (He Got Game, Men in Black II, Rent, Clerks II, Sin City, Deathproof, Daredevil, Iron Fist, Cage and The Defenders) Cyborg by Chocolate Goodness himself, Shemar Moore (Birds of Prey, Criminal Minds, The Young and the Restless, Diary of a Mad Black Woman and S.W.A.T.) Green Lantern tackled not by Ryan Reynolds but by Nathan Fillon (Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place, Firefly, Slither, Castle, Serenity and The Rookie)and the list goes on.

With the new 52 approach staying with DC Comics revamping, the storyline has altered and key components differ from its source material. I mean a Supey Smackdown fight in under 15 minutes for a 90 minute movie? Seems a bit sudden. Many are establishing this is DC's attempt to combat the crowds going to the Spider Verse and well, I can't say I completely agree with that. It could also be a bit biased on my part as I enjoyed this particular storyline.

Not a massive fan of the artwork i.e. Cartoon itself. Lacked texture and felt a bit rushed. Story overall was pretty solid, voice cast was deeply impressive so all in all, not a bad flick. A decent follow up to the Death of Superman giving hope back to the DC world that one of their greatest heroes returns. Still, he's not Batman. Yeah I said it.

Oh yeah, one last tidbit. Candyman's own Tony Todd as Darkseid. Huh?? HUH??!! 

Disco shades make folk look cranky.