Season's greetings for Day 1 of
Dismember December. A quick note on the weekly title. A
dissatissfied reader called all the horror films of last year as
horrific and wrong to be reviewed during this time of year. That
being said, I now take a gander at the last of the unofficial sequels
for Silent Night, Deadly Night. As it has been fairly clear to
anyone having the self-loathing to watch anything past the first
film, they would note the Killer Santa story arc had ended at Part 3
with Bill Mosley replacing Eric Freeman as Ricky, the second Killer
Santa and little brother to Billy. So how does this film differ from
those films and even the 4th? Howzabout killer toys, evil
robots and maybe a twisted toy maker? This is Silent Night, Deadly
Night Part 5: The Toy Maker.
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| Grrr!!! |
A young boy Derek (William Thorne
of Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey, Silent Night, Deadly Night 5: The
Toy Maker and Demonic Toys) heard the doorbell ringing and
ran down the stairs to find a Christmas present on the front porch,
His dad Tom (Van Quattro of Sweethearts, End of Days, Fight
Club, Altarcation, Time Line Inc., Biohazard: Patient Zero and Big
Yellow A-Hole) chastises the boy for answering the door at
this hour and still being up. Tom opens the present to see a strange
musical sphere (PHANTASM ALERT!!!) that suddenly fires cords around
his neck strangling him causing him to fall on the fireplace poker
leaving him impaled. Um happy holidays, Derek?
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| When I was your age, a rocket was all you needed for fun!!! |
Two weeks later Sarah (Jane
Higginson of Slaughterhouse, Danger Zone II: Reaper's Revenge, Object
of Obsession, The Silencers and The Indian), Derek's mom
thinks a visit to a toy shop might be just the ticket to help lift
his spirits...yeah because that makes it all better. Joe Petto (GET
IT??!!) played by Mickey Rooney shows
off the wacky creations of his shop which actually creeps Derek more
so as Joe's son Pino (Brian Bremer of Pumpkinhead,
Society, Dead Birds and Why Did I Get Married?)
acts strange or erratic so both Sarah and Derek retreated.
Pino breaks into
their house and claims a feeling of closeness to them and you can
imagine the need for a firearm or chainsaw. Joe trailed Pino and
apologized for Pino in the hopes to avoid the police. Sarah later
discovers that there is more than a few accusations that the
neighborhood placed on Joe as a major creeper.
With that in mind,
the story has some weird obsession with Derek, we receive a couple of
cameos from the fourth movie Initiation with Nieth Hunter reprise of
Kim and Clint Howard playing creeper Ricky which is no association
with the previous character of 2 and 3. Do they seem necessary?
Big bag of nope because they don't really bring anything to the film.
Also two sex scenes were clearly vital no doubt. One drawn out to
the level of annoyance and a quickie that added to the essence of
the film.
So how do you rank
this film? The killer toy motif has been done quite often but it
wasn't the vicious turd it has been reference and there is enough
mystery to make you wonder what the hell is going on. Shockingly
enough though I still wouldn't let young ones gawk at this one
either.
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| Beats a lesbian Wicca cult, burrowing worms and Clint Howard I suppose. |
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